tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63338683658993424962024-03-28T09:58:00.526+08:00甲板_劉崇鳳天不走,地不走,安安靜靜心不走。崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.comBlogger555125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-73837881467052688722024-03-28T09:56:00.003+08:002024-03-28T09:57:25.080+08:00推拿(71) 給虹轟的一封信<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYKq-KGVGPA-fkEE4XESIBuxp2gb3VKXusmXYqCx5KZ1rdUZD2OprLrk5U90CWVb17_cIRSeSHlC-fUvQ-NX8UqRDkKK1wfRFnbQrHUsfLhAQBkLg0OtlcYiVMaeTsdc_DNzrQn_UEUZCiRDXddO5Smha0jAraGKUukOaiZkB1QPzVU12sGA-ucJERWGM/s1824/395283422_303977582586113_6834703196939710511_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1824" data-original-width="1368" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYKq-KGVGPA-fkEE4XESIBuxp2gb3VKXusmXYqCx5KZ1rdUZD2OprLrk5U90CWVb17_cIRSeSHlC-fUvQ-NX8UqRDkKK1wfRFnbQrHUsfLhAQBkLg0OtlcYiVMaeTsdc_DNzrQn_UEUZCiRDXddO5Smha0jAraGKUukOaiZkB1QPzVU12sGA-ucJERWGM/s320/395283422_303977582586113_6834703196939710511_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><p><br /></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我睡得很好,異常的好,好到不能再好,推拿完回家能直接睡覺真是太幸福了,就是早上七點時,身體不想起床理智卻勸拉身體起床,覺得不能滿足身體的需求有點痛苦。出門的路上小飽才跟我說萊樂</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">狗狗</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">半夜叫了多次,我卻一丁點也沒聽到。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">即使近來無大事,即使走進工作室師傅和妳都說我看起來很好,推拿後身體仍因明顯放鬆而顯得那麼需要睡眠補充,讓我意識到這陣子生活真的不常把心思放在照護身體上。謝謝妳的到來</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">成為動力</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">體感的記憶上,妳的存在留給我身體的印象比三年前強烈很多,因推拿手法和節奏有很大的不同,前日,我能知覺妳對碰觸身體的清楚,儘管我只說胯下緊繃和左側脖子會疼痛,其實並沒有給需診療的大問題,因為我不是為診療而來,是為妳而來、為照護身體而來,妳在整體照護的工作中仍給了我極大的安適感──若不是放心,我其實是不輕易睡著的個案。在被人碰觸身體的過程中,要放下對自我和環境的掌控對我來說是很危險的一件事。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">很喜歡妳一開始為這次推拿選的音樂,大概是聽心靈和自然音樂太久了,當西班牙女聲的輕快慵懶環繞室內,就好像妳的手法、態度都跟耳邊西班牙旋律一樣歡快。妳處置我的雙胯緊繃,將右腳撐開,那條筋被拉緊的同時我感到舒服,因為大腿內側很久沒被外力好好關照了。然後妳問:「可以讓我實驗一下嗎?」知覺到某種慧黠和即興,我忍不住笑了……完全懂得!讓妳開跨開到比安全的範圍內再多一些,好好玩喔,跟著妳一起實驗和探索。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三年後,妳再站在我身側,一樣是波浪般的感受,卻更穩定和安在。安在不是因為反覆練習,安在似乎是妳對自我生命的掌握度。一隻腳被抓放在妳的身上,旋轉或按壓,無論妳怎麼做,我都覺得像是跳舞:</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">。妳跟我的身體在跳舞,這富藝術性的輕快讓人忍不住微笑,這女性特有的輕盈自在,讓我第一次體驗到推拿像跳舞。「深呼吸一口氣,吐出來的時候,想像一道海浪過來,然後漫上沙灘。」妳拉我受傷的左腳內側時如是說。我也許沒法即刻進入冥想中,卻因這樣的想像感到鼓舞,因為對於受傷的內側,我一向只覺匱乏或內疚,從沒想過用海浪去陪伴她。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">後來感覺到妳在我打開的兩腳中忙碌,我想女性之於兩腳之間、乳房、腹部這些較為敏感的地域,若有信任的女推拿師帶著愛來照護,其實會產生巨大的溫暖和親密感,那是技術態度再好的男治療師都難以企及的。同性之間相互給出信任與愛,面朝我們都知道是那麼害怕受傷,滿載壓抑、羞恥、藏汙納垢</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">如委屈困惑憤怒等情緒</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">的敏感地帶,就有療癒出現。印象中就妳、和美辰站在我的兩腿之間工作時,我會有「好好喔</span><span lang="EN-US">~</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">怎麼那麼好</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">」一種如釋重負的窩心,那是難得而無比珍貴的時刻。我不說出口,但會在心底一直說謝謝。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">妳在我正面工作了蠻長的時間,期間經過了手、胸部外側、並揉壓到腹部。妳揉壓到我右腹上方時,第一時間我感覺到「痛」,但要說精準一點,那不是痛,那是「不舒服」。因妳有再下手深按,像試探又或評估,似乎是在那短暫直接的深入中,引起我無意識的抵抗。當下我湧起一種陌生而奇怪的「不適」,那種不適來得非常突然而且讓我困惑,「不爽」來得迅速莫名,意識反應不及,只聽到有個聲音在吶喊:「不要碰!」我猶豫著要不要跟妳說,因為妳的手正在那上面思考。那當下我沒能辨識出那是一股極隱微的「深埋的被漠視的憤怒」,有種不被尊重的痛苦。但我必須跟妳說,因為那股「不要碰」的聲音就快變成尖叫了,而確實,在推拿經驗的互動上我們仍然陌生,我不知怎麼處理這不知所措,也不好意思直說,就跟妳說「那裡不舒服。」妳一聽,就停手了,我閃過這一層探查。</span> </p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">只是幾十秒間發生的事,卻是電光石火。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我很感謝在事後喝茶時的交流,妳坦誠告訴我妳摸到右腹上方時的內心感受:「幹,這是一個巨大的垃圾!」我整個傻眼啊……才回頭細思那時的自己到底發生了什麼事?那股疼痛其實複雜,腹部有悶脹,但不是痛,痛的是深埋的東西。妳的靈動妳的特殊詮釋能協助我意會,自以為是長大的我到底丟掉、壓制或忽略了什麼。而今我對那個「不要碰」的吶喊充滿好奇與疼惜</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">打出疼惜二次時,莫名鼻酸</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">──那個疼痛,原來是被包裝精良的垃圾。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">其實從妳按手開始,我就不自覺意識開始模糊了</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">對,還沒翻面時</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,痛的時候意識會回來,比如右胸外側、或左胸和左肩繞璇感到卡卡時。昏沉的意識間,胸部的疼痛提醒我今年還沒去照乳房超音波,我的左胸去年檢測出有乳房纖維囊腫,該年年追蹤檢查的,今年也要記得呀</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">後來呢,我們是不是翻面了?翻面之後我睡得蠻沉,只有妳在背上左肩胛內側一兩個點按壓的疼痛能讓我回神。推拿久了,而今多數的疼痛我都能接受,也就是說我看好因推拿引起的疼痛釋放對身體的照護力,所以有痛我都喜歡都甘願</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這心態好像有點奇怪</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,後背幾個疼痛點的強烈我到現在都還記得。我想如果患者不要太抵抗疼痛的話,一點痛其實能讓自己更好睡。</span> </p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">感覺睡了很久,我隱隱知曉也許已超過時間,妳在我身上付出的心力超過預期,當妳拉起我兩手時,赫然驚覺要結束了嗎?蛤,可是左邊的脖子……還沒被輪到……不行我還要虹轟……所以我開口央求,而妳也二話不說,請我翻到側面,讓妳再跟脖子和肩膀多工作一會兒。那時我醒了,感覺妳的手找到脖子鬆與緊平衡的關鍵處時,忍不住發出聲音,那是一種嘆息──因開口要求得到回應讓我感覺自己被愛被珍視,需求被明確的回應對我來說是如此重要,不同於童年處境,謝謝妳,虹轟!</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">像睡了一個長長的覺</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">雖然偶爾會疼痛</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,休息過後精神很好,會後兩人的商談對我來說也很享受。於此我才意會到右腹上側的秘密,以及,「日常沒事並不代表身體不需要推拿」這個事實。聽到妳說自己在推拿過程中的種種思緒,反問自己為何在此的懷疑,讓我也有點心疼呢。希望這份回饋能讓妳知曉那日妳存在對我的意義。謝謝妳願意,祝福妳找到清楚篤定專屬於林虹穎與身體接觸的神祕道路。因為虹轟呢,就是這麼靈動、精怪、奇特又令人安心的女子呀!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">2023.03.28 am9:50</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">崇鳳於美濃</span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-35405712929875339392024-02-28T21:51:00.000+08:002024-02-28T21:51:12.462+08:00推拿(70)你有沒有什麼忠告要跟我說<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe14AspDli0L-IJGTwyj_PVAHGmMZxhFDA_1O8tgTHRdA_Y8b6KNZvoCf1QLsQhYkCxsdYX3UWw0wIO3x8ZfPfcYAsWIaygYB83JogQaD9xOMYg-lJuPLYIS3QEQt5Odm_lHKwfDp4H2J_Y368DB8wviSvyq-T5yXLkC6W5T7y7PSwXB6gx8_kGoLTISY/s1890/422956946_7251330944985606_2073167187669881392_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1890" data-original-width="1890" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe14AspDli0L-IJGTwyj_PVAHGmMZxhFDA_1O8tgTHRdA_Y8b6KNZvoCf1QLsQhYkCxsdYX3UWw0wIO3x8ZfPfcYAsWIaygYB83JogQaD9xOMYg-lJuPLYIS3QEQt5Odm_lHKwfDp4H2J_Y368DB8wviSvyq-T5yXLkC6W5T7y7PSwXB6gx8_kGoLTISY/s320/422956946_7251330944985606_2073167187669881392_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「師傅,一年到頭了,你有沒有什麼忠告要跟我說?」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我躺在那裡,忽然想到甚麼似地,開口詢問是出於好奇,更是信任。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我真想知道,這熟悉我身體狀況與性格的推拿師,時間走到現在,他能給我甚麼建議。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而當時我並未意識到,自己其實是向外尋求答案,以供參考。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「忠告喔……妳說哪方面的?」推拿師總是很認真看待我的提問。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「任何方面,之於我,你想得到的都可以。」我說。其實我也不過是過年了要領一個信籤那樣的心情。但我不信神這裡也沒有廟,而是徵詢一位信任的朋友,那樣的日常。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我很期待。推拿師正在認真思考中。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">到底是甚麼呢?</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「……不求甚解吧!」他說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「什麼?」我一時沒會意過來。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「妳太求解方,可以不求甚解,更趨近於真實。」推拿師說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「這是要我做差不多小姐的意思嗎?」我感到荒謬,其實是不解。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">他笑了:「差不多差不多……」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">其後我繼續追問</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">看吧,就是追根究底的性子</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,不求甚解是甚麼意思呀?凡事求解這性子有什麼問題?我從不認為有問題啊……</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這就是問題</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">他說,因為這世界上有太多無解的事情了,不求甚解的態度會更適切,某種程度上,也是一種放過自己。這樣過日子,相對比較輕鬆吧。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我不懂</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">繼續求解</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,沒辦法接受自己做差不多小姐,這才意識到自己對事物的探尋有多麼上窮碧落下黃泉</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">是這樣用的嗎?</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,光是不求甚解,我就是要打破沙鍋問到底。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">幾個月後,讀到了一本書。那是臉譜出版談罕見疾病的一本翻譯書籍《疾病的隱域》,讀到第九章〈出錯的免疫系統〉時,看到所謂「消極能力」一詞。一邊讀一邊感到似曾相識?有什麼相仿的論調曾出現過嗎?關於「不求甚解」……</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「</span><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">十九世紀的詩人約翰‧濟慈寫這封信時正面臨母親死於肺結核的境況,那在當時是種病因不明的神祕疾病……他試著向弟弟說明區分偉大藝術家與不錯的藝術家的關鍵:濟慈將這種至關重要的特質稱為『消極能力』,也就是『能夠接受不確定性、神秘與懷疑,不煩燥不安地追尋事實與緣由』的能力。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">我不禁認為,濟慈如此重視『接受不確定性』,是因他的家庭總籠罩著肺癆揮之不去的陰影;老實說,這種『消極能力』似乎正是濟慈能夠直面痛苦後好好活下去的原因……</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">」──梅根‧歐羅克</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">她沒說錯,是人類至今對身體以致於宇宙所知的一切仍然是那麼少,但我們的文化卻卯足全力要淡化這個事實。於是我們窮根究柢,就是要抓出一個道理,彷彿知道為什麼才有根基可以繼續前進,卻不承認我們「不知道」的東西還有太多太多。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">梅根‧歐羅克談的是罕見疾病,我想的是人生態度。每當我身體哪裡出現狀況或思考出現偏差,總急於修復或更正,追著醫生或治療師問「為什麼」,在他們回答後我再繼續問「那又為什麼……」。而今我不禁想,那醫生或治療師,難道他們生命中沒有困惑或不確定嗎?他們如何自處?他們沒嫌我囉嗦就不錯了。凡事都要知道都要掌握,這樣的人生真的很累也不切實際。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">與其說不求甚解是一種「消極能力」的練習,或可坦然接受我知道得就是那麼少,真實世界本不一定有解,不求甚解,或可是對待未知的一種慎重與尊敬,保留喘息的餘地給自己,是一種溫柔。即使面對未知我們不無痛苦惶惑。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">還沒說完呢,推拿結束,最後離開前,恬不知恥的我在喝茶的時刻繼續追擊,跟推拿師再要一個:「那麼,如果說,請你給我的身體一個忠告,會是什麼?」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「不是給了麼?」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「不一樣,剛剛是針對整體,這次是針對身體。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「喔。」</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">他怎麼沒翻我白眼</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「好啦,歲末年終,來嘛來嘛</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">」</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這個人,真的是……</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「……」推拿師認真思考,他思考到轉身看牆壁。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「怎麼要想那麼久?」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「等我一下,我要把妳的性格考慮進去,再給忠告。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">好吧,我等。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「非常好!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「……蛤?!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「我給妳身體的忠告就是:非常好!」推拿師篤定無比地說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「這是什麼……忠告?」我瞬間有點茫然。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「妳要忠告是希望更好,我能給的忠告就是妳的身體非常好,沒什麼其他的了。」推拿師說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「這樣啊……」我想我的神情一定有點僵,沒想到會收到這回應。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">無須再用力追求什麼了吧</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就不求甚解吧,非常好呢。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">好喔,這忠告我收下了!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-6073204297375127162023-12-21T14:05:00.007+08:002024-01-05T21:58:39.041+08:00如願 (致汪其楣)<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinRZucnx7OM4TiAR7ZswcuYZ2C7wddp2eEW8sWFxrSAy54Jqaxx74nkbeXVxvxEfWye6P0eE9571jQksIjdtGkIAhGIx4thh6_1veTS-GPhj-QuThkGbvEm_xQcq3IKScKVDKU8AJEwWFgkELXC8wCL7aEzzQYlFWJiMTf964SG6hw0aGOsF-TMn3bPe8/s2016/%E5%B8%AB%E7%94%9F%E4%B9%8B%E9%96%93.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1512" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEinRZucnx7OM4TiAR7ZswcuYZ2C7wddp2eEW8sWFxrSAy54Jqaxx74nkbeXVxvxEfWye6P0eE9571jQksIjdtGkIAhGIx4thh6_1veTS-GPhj-QuThkGbvEm_xQcq3IKScKVDKU8AJEwWFgkELXC8wCL7aEzzQYlFWJiMTf964SG6hw0aGOsF-TMn3bPe8/s320/%E5%B8%AB%E7%94%9F%E4%B9%8B%E9%96%93.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">12</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">月。冬日。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">南方終於冷了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我將幾張照片置入一個資料夾,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">對自己許諾,把故事說完,如同完成自己。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">人生很短,真心做人。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">---</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那日我們在台北左轉有書發表新書,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">還是炎熱的夏日,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">汪老大來訊邀約我倆吃飯,說她該日正好也在台北某頒獎典禮,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">會後可以趕過來左轉有書找我們。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">她進來時,我們正坐在咖啡館裡面的最裡面</span>,<span face="新細明體, serif">與眾人分享</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face="新細明體, serif">有病</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face="新細明體, serif">的人生。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">不知為何,個頭小小的她,走入人潮最末端,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">仍能感受到一股氣勢。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">眼尖的卉君早早發現,她中斷分享,一個細微示意的動作,傾身輕聲</span>:<span face="新細明體, serif">「汪老大來了。」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">個頭小小的老師在後方揮手回應,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">看似平凡,那一股篤定的恢弘感,卻如此鮮明。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那一刻,因為老師駕到,我有些恍神了。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">大學時我是個成日晃蕩的翹課少女,除了登山就是睡覺。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">儘管喜愛中文系,卻沒一門課能讓我定得下來。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">唯獨戲劇制演,只要走進地下室的黑盒子,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">看汪老大氣勢恢弘的排場,教唆我們做這演那,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">你便見一整班學生乖乖任其擺佈……</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那魔法太厲害了,我們不隨意任人擺佈。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">但我確實,從未翹過戲劇課。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">不僅不缺課,還認真作筆記,人生短短的大學四年,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">唯有這門課會讓我下課後整理筆記,將其完整,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">回到童年資優生那樣要求自己。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我從不知我喜歡戲劇,事實上也不盡然,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">但若人生能遇到一個能收服自己的老師,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">學生可能會為了這個學問奮力精進。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">從來都是去借別人筆記臨時抱佛腳的我,在這門課竟有人跟我借筆記</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face="新細明體, serif">借人家筆記原來是這種感覺</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">從沒見過自己這般認真的模樣,若不是遇見汪其楣老師。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">自此,班上同學私下暱稱她「汪老大」。</span> </p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老師只教了我們一年,隨後不久離開了成大。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">畢業之後,人生海海,許多年未聯繫。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">但汪老大還是那樣,有什麼說什麼,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">有女王的威儀卻始終沒有老師的架子。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">她會在學生臉書文章下面毫不吝嗇地留言,活潑多情又充滿生命力;</span><span face="新細明體, serif">她會給出隻字片語告訴你寫得真好,儘管你是她眾多莘莘學子的滄海一粟;</span><span face="新細明體, serif">她甚至會選出妳的文章端上舞台煞有其事去演出,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">她只做她她想做的,而無關乎世事風雲,這樣的風範一直銘記在心中。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而這年夏天我和卉君出版新書《人生有病才完整》,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">邀請老師推薦。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有人問</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有病</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">跟劇作家有什麼關係呢?</span><span face="新細明體, serif">唔,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">有她在,我感覺溫暖。不需要理由。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">於是那一刻她走進來,坐在最後方靜候分享會結束</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face="新細明體, serif">我的媽啊我們怎麼可以讓老師等,她來只為了帶我們去吃飯……</span><span lang="EN-US">),</span><span face="新細明體, serif">那麼多年過去了,老師老了、縮小了,而老師還是那麼可愛。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">左轉有書外,還不知道吃哪裡,我們合照,</span><span lang="EN-US">77</span><span face="新細明體, serif">歲的老師更顯雍容華貴,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">以身教舉止告訴我們,未來可以如何。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">莊嚴的威儀不變,一轉身,又俏皮活潑起來。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">後來,虧得穆的指引,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">一行人竟決定去立法院國會的康園餐廳吃飯!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">走往立法院的路上,我看著身邊的老師,有些困惑,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">記起以前坐台下仰望她,那時她是那般高大,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">此刻在我身側,原來比我還小一號啊……</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那段不長不短台北街頭的行路,我感受到是什麼風把老師吹來。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">她看完《人生有病才完整》,除了大力推薦讚好外,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">也疼惜我和卉君種種遭遇心路,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">她不說,直接現身,抓我倆吃飯去!</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face="新細明體, serif">真汪老大</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">此生,堂堂走進立法院,因為汪老大要帶孩子去吃飯。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">餐廳上笑語,多年來未曾如此與她親近,近距離交換生活信息,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">老師用她的生命言行對我們示範,身為一個人,如何</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face="新細明體, serif">存在</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face="新細明體, serif">,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">如此表明愛與熱切。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">對一個少不更事屌兒郎噹的無恥大學生</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而言,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">實在是生命的大禮。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">你永遠不能預測生命如何安排你們的相遇,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">也無法得知緣分與愛如何流轉,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">但只要好好走著、誠實向上,就能感受到運命的精彩。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">用生命奮力去活,活出自己,莫忘愛人。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">捷運站外,夜風微涼,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">卉君和穆先走,我挽著老師的手步下捷運站,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">一對一的關係讓我有些緊張,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">老師與我說,</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face="新細明體, serif">有病</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face="新細明體, serif">裡頭的文字讓她心有戚戚焉......</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「蛤</span><span lang="EN-US">~</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老師,妳也有這些心路歷程嗎?!」我倒抽一口氣。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「當然啊,我也是。」她毫不掩飾,一貫爽俐。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">鬧哄哄的捷運站裡她說話的聲音仍具中氣,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">等車時刻教導我如何甩手保健。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我只是,突然不確定自己的位置,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">捷運來了,礙於學生的身分我該當走在後頭,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">其實想站在她前方為她開路,然而我的身體動作太慢,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">走進人群蜂擁的車廂,老師眼一瞪,</span><span face="新細明體, serif">直挺挺的胸膛大步前行,彷彿能劈開人潮。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">我跟在她身後走著,只覺天寬地闊。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一個女子,如此編劇、寫書、教學、演戲,始終主動大方表達她對孩子們的關愛。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">年過</span><span lang="EN-US">75</span><span face="新細明體, serif">,依舊具行動力爭取與創造,不忘精心養護與打扮自身。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">那麼前瞻、那麼豐沛。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face="新細明體, serif">秋日,收到老師叮嚀,</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「崇鳳,我也常想妳現在適宜做</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">甩手</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這類柔軟的內功,養氣。而不是跑步登山消耗熱量的外功硬功……我說過嗎?我跟妳說過嗎?就這樣惦記著。」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">末了,還交代:「收工緩緩,閉上眼,讓熱氣環動全身。」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老師,妳命中了,但我不聽話,內功好難。我沒回訊,用心銘記。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face="新細明體, serif">這篇札記為妳而寫,崇鳳一點心意。</span><span lang="EN-US">2024</span><span face="新細明體, serif">新年快樂平安。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZK7KQCt3JhAvw9Grzz8CBgHiA1iBAZr85anNvxFhYoMycpuQG7NVXR4VsFq4soGErjA10Bw2lC2jXSd_vxZIQJj83m4Nu8VVuvMRK9WMWJDubQ0C1f_XQy6kJ6wKFkCHKSWK-dLLUZJ6TRsylk1vIFDRy2udgcwTODTld82j0UQsJdC0RLmXwN6eaUdU/s4032/377494869_6656179054470099_8169734759471230675_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZK7KQCt3JhAvw9Grzz8CBgHiA1iBAZr85anNvxFhYoMycpuQG7NVXR4VsFq4soGErjA10Bw2lC2jXSd_vxZIQJj83m4Nu8VVuvMRK9WMWJDubQ0C1f_XQy6kJ6wKFkCHKSWK-dLLUZJ6TRsylk1vIFDRy2udgcwTODTld82j0UQsJdC0RLmXwN6eaUdU/s320/377494869_6656179054470099_8169734759471230675_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></span></div><span lang="EN-US"><br /></span><p></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-78871258645850547752023-12-02T22:30:00.002+08:002023-12-02T22:30:17.684+08:00你且看,遍地開花 (山岳書寫觀察)<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirB4ivyz3cDromQ2M7oAU8yeWuX_VBOsf4_l7RXorwRARcuBau1Skl9QmdhAjZzDsYFu-3fSKIGAxb5B5bRFoWnkC1EgCOcQn2KYFte-nz7wOovvEKrR4KF2qX4IxXw3zATZJhZe4L0V2_z-tYS6ptWCqeXjgROgiCMPEidqxbUsWet4jX9tciOF6-fmA/s2016/%E5%B1%B1%E5%B2%B3%E6%9B%B8%E5%AF%AB%20(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1512" data-original-width="2016" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirB4ivyz3cDromQ2M7oAU8yeWuX_VBOsf4_l7RXorwRARcuBau1Skl9QmdhAjZzDsYFu-3fSKIGAxb5B5bRFoWnkC1EgCOcQn2KYFte-nz7wOovvEKrR4KF2qX4IxXw3zATZJhZe4L0V2_z-tYS6ptWCqeXjgROgiCMPEidqxbUsWet4jX9tciOF6-fmA/s320/%E5%B1%B1%E5%B2%B3%E6%9B%B8%E5%AF%AB%20(1).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /> <p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那是在木杆鞍部,往上就是雲稜山莊,往下就是南湖溪山屋,我從宜蘭台</span><span lang="EN-US">7</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">甲線公路沿登山口而來,蹲坐在岔路牌下吃餅乾,一個人。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一位大哥停下腳步與我對話,聊一聊他問:「小姐,我很好奇,妳說妳一個人上山,為了寫書啊……請問妳怎麼會想上山寫呢?這不是很辛苦嗎?」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「因為我喜歡看登山書寫,可是台灣相關登山的書真的好少喔,沒辦法,只好自己上來寫了。」我拖著腮幫子想了一下,說。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那位大哥向我豎起大拇指,「真的,這部分的書不多吼?好喔,祝妳山屋寫作順利!」他繼續前行以前,又回頭:「小姐,妳的書寫出來以後,要在哪裡能看到啊?」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我想了半天,沒把握我要多久才會寫完。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因為這樣,我留了聯繫方式給他,跟他說,如果寫出來,會跟他說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是</span><span lang="EN-US">2011</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">年秋天發生的事,距今</span><span lang="EN-US">12</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">年。至終我把書寫完順利出版,已是</span><span lang="EN-US">5</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">年後。那時青澀,記得我翻出夾鏈袋裡那位大哥的聯繫字條,捎封</span><span lang="EN-US">mail</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">告知。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我知道這兩三年台灣的出版業界關於自然書寫、生態書寫、環境書寫如火如荼,但已經很少逛書店。那日在花蓮的孩好書屋,走進去探訪朋友,一走入,迎面就是一面自然書系的展示櫃,我蹲下來,瀏覽每一個字,靜看每一個美麗的封面。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">覺得,台灣好精彩。一整面與山相關的書系排開,各色各樣都有。那多年前寫完出版的書《我願成為山的侍者》早已絕版,沒有我的書,但是我好滿足。只覺豐盛,不知為何孕生一股滿足──沒錯,這就是當年我渴望遇見的豐盛!我讀不完,但我知道每一本書,都踏踏實實踩在土地上。喜歡大自然並將自然認真記錄下來的人那麼多,好棒喔</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">何其有幸,我遇見了這個時代。嘩啦啦的文字流淌著這繽紛多彩的島嶼風景,山岳書寫遍地開花。站在書櫃前,彷彿嗅聞得到森林的氣味。作為小小讀者,我為台灣山林的精采感到驕傲,有這麼多各色各樣的作品陪伴,不知為何我竟振奮不已。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">大哥,我想看見的、想參與的,就是站在這樣的書牆前津津有味地翻閱啊!!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">p.s</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">謝謝闆娘</span><span lang="EN-US">paggy</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">精心設計,謝謝孩好書屋。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrpF8pxS3-xJrdT6frBPlTKMlORWzYtsHLe1nBj-NxIF2VFZ1k9V9wBTx_qiQyhPOm2tkfoqDPG8fzxTXuEAai3k3_1Xoy76YMqMj6l1JVQPx3m5UxzOal1phhgo46dOW75BD51b_WCUA2KwHF4fqf1MUwLTroGzaQoZAgMUtzarlggxTg9ymLkBL2Mcc/s1890/%E5%B1%B1%E5%B2%B3%E6%9B%B8%E5%AF%AB%20(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1890" data-original-width="1890" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrpF8pxS3-xJrdT6frBPlTKMlORWzYtsHLe1nBj-NxIF2VFZ1k9V9wBTx_qiQyhPOm2tkfoqDPG8fzxTXuEAai3k3_1Xoy76YMqMj6l1JVQPx3m5UxzOal1phhgo46dOW75BD51b_WCUA2KwHF4fqf1MUwLTroGzaQoZAgMUtzarlggxTg9ymLkBL2Mcc/s320/%E5%B1%B1%E5%B2%B3%E6%9B%B8%E5%AF%AB%20(2).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7vtmew8gUrtXmZlet-rf-PlgJ6PRZUu0FTYxuBU9nUX1uOqikMoSfzBsfDdYhVi0Kx727pXsZbFSieqozJ5gzEixMv5nH-itqfq8wZmmVznLZOOcaf11rkqTmyrnmQtx6PtunagwSSJ-AS7KAW27vzGUa8rsg0FDCwMr8kDwzy_4M-iOLbfCRNvYdSok/s1890/%E5%B1%B1%E5%B2%B3%E6%9B%B8%E5%AF%AB%20(3).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1890" data-original-width="1890" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7vtmew8gUrtXmZlet-rf-PlgJ6PRZUu0FTYxuBU9nUX1uOqikMoSfzBsfDdYhVi0Kx727pXsZbFSieqozJ5gzEixMv5nH-itqfq8wZmmVznLZOOcaf11rkqTmyrnmQtx6PtunagwSSJ-AS7KAW27vzGUa8rsg0FDCwMr8kDwzy_4M-iOLbfCRNvYdSok/s320/%E5%B1%B1%E5%B2%B3%E6%9B%B8%E5%AF%AB%20(3).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-72487265356726310382023-11-29T16:07:00.007+08:002023-11-29T21:10:38.862+08:00尋找我的如來佛,解除我的緊箍咒 (2023WFR復訓)<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhii-9PnxWsUE_BuhsT-RyxhQk-n5oKqUcDIRBb4iUPiURcpLwZGCknnBO0TRhCdkXDUGrUVLoXB76xU0CIpceWJ9Q3yzYC7_YHP3BP_sDg-Xnzq2POU9jJW2YMqElBxtRt7kPvcZeU5IYB_9ZXx4rEEMFnrBpEtm3pYUUA1SZDqHa4R17k1XjMMlz971g/s1773/377107585_867733205075730_3816160623345638367_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1330" data-original-width="1773" height="261" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhii-9PnxWsUE_BuhsT-RyxhQk-n5oKqUcDIRBb4iUPiURcpLwZGCknnBO0TRhCdkXDUGrUVLoXB76xU0CIpceWJ9Q3yzYC7_YHP3BP_sDg-Xnzq2POU9jJW2YMqElBxtRt7kPvcZeU5IYB_9ZXx4rEEMFnrBpEtm3pYUUA1SZDqHa4R17k1XjMMlz971g/w348-h261/377107585_867733205075730_3816160623345638367_n.jpg" width="348" /></a></div> [2023/11/27,新店女童軍訓練中心,結訓合照]<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><span face="新細明體, serif"><br /></span><p></p><p><span face="新細明體, serif">那其實是一種傳統發考卷的模式,老師將最高分放在一疊考卷的最上頭,依分數高低往下排列,他會宣布全班最高分是誰,然後再慢慢往下發。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「我們沒有</span><span lang="EN-US">100</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">分,但是,但是</span><span lang="EN-US">……</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有</span><span lang="EN-US">98</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">分!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">班上發出了一種驚異聲,我感覺到某種強烈的既視感。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我們熟悉,因為那是一種,等待被宣判,你領取你的成績單,分數將告知你結局。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「發考卷囉,</span><span lang="EN-US">98</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">分</span><span lang="EN-US">……</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">崇鳳!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我站起來的瞬間,全班發出一種讚嘆聲,同時所有人的眼睛都看向我這頭,那當下我便回到小學的教室裡,實在太過相似,唯一不同的是,我長大了。我能區別,這種目光的仰望其實並不影響我本體的價值──它不會擴張優良。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「謝謝。」我領取考卷,對奕緯頷首。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小鳳鳳,好久不見。原來</span>妳一直在。我知道,如果妳認真專注又做到心無旁騖,妳真的是筆試健將。</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">與童年不同的是,我能辨識出學習優良者被肯定的</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">荒蕪</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">。某種特殊的領悟在心底滋生,在大家讚嘆與羨慕的目光中,我學會不因此迷失,不再為眾人目光所牽引,在此之前,我已能肯定自己,我真的做得很好。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我該做的是,把焦點移轉回自身,看向題目,有甚麼是我還不會的?錯一題不再讓我懊惱沒有</span><span lang="EN-US">100</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">分,其實錯一題剛好,它讓我顯得平凡,而還有繼續學習的機會</span><span lang="EN-US">(100</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">分就沒戲了</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face="新細明體, serif">以此類推,如果今天考不好,這外在分數也不會影響我對自己的認同,要確認的是自己真的想學習嗎?是不想考試、失常、還是真的不會?</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">考試的意義,在於測驗自己所學吸收多少,儘管有其運氣</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">考題是否剛好考到自己會的或不會的</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,但考試本身是確實是檢測自己學習成效的途徑,有錯誤是好事,這會讓自己學習到更多,我會因糾正而對此有印象。每一個錯誤都在提醒我,不要放棄挑戰與改變,學習是快樂的事。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我很驚訝,因為這不是中文系出身的我擅長</span><span lang="EN-US">/</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">感興趣的學科</span><span lang="EN-US">(野外救難</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">醫學</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,必須加倍努力才能理解,我給自己時間,而更重要的是,為自己創造安全感,只要讓自己冷靜與安定,我就能發揮實力。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這次</span><span lang="EN-US">WFR</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">復訓,刻意讓自己成為獨立的個體報名,不再跟著誰一起,因為我多需要找回自主的自己,不再受其他人所影響。而今才知曉,我有多麼容易緊張、多在乎外在表現,這樣的情緒緊繃竟無關乎自我本身的價值,而純粹只渴望被肯定被看見,我不想再為此奔赴,它只會高度耗損精神,而忘了我到底想學習什麼。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就像</span><span lang="EN-US">CPR</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">安妮,只要我能靜下來,觀察自己為何沒做到標準,除了過於緊張,也發現做完的手臂前臂竟明顯發痠,這不是該用力的部位,發現時,像發現秘密一樣,過於緊繃讓全身出力,事實上,手臂只要打直,用核心的力量下壓即可,手臂不過是傳導途徑,正確的</span><span lang="EN-US">CPR</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">過程手臂不會太痠。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三年前的初訓,我忘了自己到底做了幾次才做對那一次,只覺無限挫折,否定自己的感受是那麼辛苦,找不到解方是因為求好心切。每次做不好,我都在鞭打自己</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就像小時候考試沒考好就會被打那樣</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,全然複製升學時期的處罰模式。事實上,做不好要觀察自己,像柯南一樣檢查自身線索,擬定校正方案,再做一次即可,能多做是好事。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三年後,我為自己赴約,面對安妮,在練習第二次即達到標準過關的時刻,連自己都意外,我沒有太費力啊,只是很專注、很安靜鼓勵自己持續,就這樣達標了?我甚至沒有戴買好的白手套</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">每次練習手汗都狂流</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">……我過了,好開心ㄡ!!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">花了足足</span><span lang="EN-US">40</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">年,才慢慢解除考試的緊箍咒,真心為自己歡慶。最在意最慎重等待的大演練,公布角色名單時,發現自己是患者</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">被救援者</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,理論上該額手稱慶躲過一劫,我卻深刻記得一股隱微的失落──當患者等於失去練習救援的操作機會,正因術科操作是我最弱的部分,能閃過是好運,卻隱約有失望。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老天,原來我想當主救援者啊!</span><span lang="EN-US">(怎麼可能</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">~主救援超難超緊張的啊~~~</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因為可以學最多,所以我要跳火坑。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">學習的渴望是那麼強烈,我就是為此而來的,為了看見一個全新的自己。我將自己放逐,到一個全然陌生的班級,接觸最沒有信心的領域</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">野外救難醫學</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,我惶惶不安而來,而後驚見一個陌生又可愛的我,這個我不用優秀,但靜定而自在,清楚自己學習的目標,投入上課的所有內容──我喜歡這樣的我,這我沒見過的自己。也因為放飛自己,認識許多友善的同學有了新朋友。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那除魅的咒語是這樣說的:無論妳表現得如何,都不會影響我對妳的愛。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">親愛的小鳳鳳,生日快樂:)</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju5Wa8MG6gKitHLQeqG5Q7HD3srfMvsC1y6d6M_ZjIyKspGnFvQSFafhSgpQAHFaq1gsseee6JI_iZcpAS-UYEEeVlO_6JPkFMoR8f2uw4mITe7dtacseVWnRoWEuNQPuqg3aVZ4OUT5BG6-gvvBf_l5hpPz_uyWvZ-kXyislVSzO01RtYh-jy_dyOykM/s1890/370082250_780311400778342_3243433240325048103_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1890" data-original-width="1747" height="342" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju5Wa8MG6gKitHLQeqG5Q7HD3srfMvsC1y6d6M_ZjIyKspGnFvQSFafhSgpQAHFaq1gsseee6JI_iZcpAS-UYEEeVlO_6JPkFMoR8f2uw4mITe7dtacseVWnRoWEuNQPuqg3aVZ4OUT5BG6-gvvBf_l5hpPz_uyWvZ-kXyislVSzO01RtYh-jy_dyOykM/w318-h342/370082250_780311400778342_3243433240325048103_n.jpg" width="318" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgX28E_g95M9PQknp_8yMaIUj4-xEUTNrBqm459y0nhG9MjZTSJqCzRq1g64S6rktcbbUsfcqSvx9O8UxrRgRvctVK1jEo4ydvnedas33RcKnrzF0wi93DVmtBsQmhmqoOxXb5bQXXj0fDRDm8XQLP4GD05fraiv8cmmsyb27wUebv36gR3Lr3dJp87hjA/s1935/368072121_194117007087569_2373383888781825622_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1383" data-original-width="1935" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgX28E_g95M9PQknp_8yMaIUj4-xEUTNrBqm459y0nhG9MjZTSJqCzRq1g64S6rktcbbUsfcqSvx9O8UxrRgRvctVK1jEo4ydvnedas33RcKnrzF0wi93DVmtBsQmhmqoOxXb5bQXXj0fDRDm8XQLP4GD05fraiv8cmmsyb27wUebv36gR3Lr3dJp87hjA/s320/368072121_194117007087569_2373383888781825622_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-46549900818650444692023-11-18T09:32:00.007+08:002023-11-18T09:32:58.987+08:00推拿(69)_這種幸福 我正慢慢品嘗<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJQ-wdoPiNpIfv7MJU1jfr9SlMy3W8zgAMPmSh5WyHTJM2ZMgXNVwXIk35-CdhseYsB72fuCfuKolGi77AbYolS4a56Ln-uNNLlYmCx3U3tnLSObb0py8wM6Uye6CzfAlpiu4WjVveKBNCh7YPxBx66_aJEcc7jFuQKaGYhekdpb0oONyNWmQShZ-CSCE/s2016/376572559_360583486641669_7615789271357197430_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1134" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJQ-wdoPiNpIfv7MJU1jfr9SlMy3W8zgAMPmSh5WyHTJM2ZMgXNVwXIk35-CdhseYsB72fuCfuKolGi77AbYolS4a56Ln-uNNLlYmCx3U3tnLSObb0py8wM6Uye6CzfAlpiu4WjVveKBNCh7YPxBx66_aJEcc7jFuQKaGYhekdpb0oONyNWmQShZ-CSCE/s320/376572559_360583486641669_7615789271357197430_n.jpg" width="180" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">關於「給出」,我一直是不知不覺的。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我視「給出」為證明自我價值的重要關鍵,能給力的時候,我絕不會吝嗇。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">於是推拿師在我手臂上做工的時間,是愈來愈長。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這天他處理我的左臂,震動鬆緩好一些時候,隨後施壓──我隱隱感覺到,那部位的肌肉瞬間</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">站起來</span><span lang="EN-US">”了</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「……我還沒按下去,它已經準備好反抗了。」推拿師嗤笑了一聲。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「嗯,它確實有反應。」不知怎麼形容肌肉忽然</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">站起來</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">的動態,但我能知覺。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「你看身體有多聰明!」推拿師悶哼。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">是呀,我根本沒下任何指令,在腦袋放空的狀態下,身體莫名地啟動預防機制。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">猛然想起很久很久以前的……某種體感,或說,反應機制。忽然明白,也許是那時候訓練起來的防衛機轉。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那個遙遠的畫面飄進了我的腦海:久遠的童年,在父母棍子要打下來之前,我會先弓起身體防衛……「問你喔,如果知道要被處罰,事先繃緊身體,這樣被打,是不是會比較不痛?」我開口徵詢確認。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「是的!」推拿師快速明確地回應了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">所以繃緊是有效的啊……難怪我的身體要緊這麼久。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因為我的提問,推拿師侃侃而談,他說了另一種更高層次的可能,那是心理上能全然接受被打壓,因此放鬆身體,那會很痛,卻較不容易導致創傷。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是一種境界,我高攀不了,只深刻記得那個童年繃緊身體的女孩。為了保護自己,身體會自動反應到比大腦更快速預測外力的到來。即使被推拿,還是能精準預防。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">年幼的我,如此自主學習防禦,面對無法拒絕的侵犯</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">如巴掌或藤條</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,我是如何讓自己失去感覺,關閉感知來保護自己的呢?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">原來,這樣真的會比較不痛,那當然要繃緊啊!因為不知罰責甚麼時候會突然下來,那乾脆時刻繃緊。放鬆是很危險的一件事。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">爸說,以前阿公打他們打得更兇,所以現在這樣是很輕的啊</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">孩子如我理應承受,這都不算什麼。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老舊斑駁的記憶漸漸復甦,我那肌肉的瞬間抵抗原來是這樣形塑的。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">既然平常不會輕易放鬆,工作起來更倍加努力,雙手會這麼緊,很合理啊!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「很少遇到左右手的緊繃程度是這麼一致的……」推拿師喃喃。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我笑了,不定期推拿進入第五年,才終於學會在高強度的工作後,知覺手臂僵硬,而願意為自己的手按摩了。清楚自己慣用手過度努力,我會按右手更多一些,如此令兩手緊繃程度差不多,大概也算一種進步。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因大量「給出」力量,儘管不做粗活、未提重物,當精神意識全副投入於助人工作,無形力量的「給出」也會令雙手緊繃。這直接影響到肩胛骨,肩胛骨會卡會糾結是當然,其單點按壓讓我感到刺激,背卻因此慢慢活絡。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">身體真的有記憶。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「你會願意,再踢我一次嗎?」療程雖到尾聲,我忍不住問推拿師。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">想起了三週前的推拿經驗──那時我跟鬼沒什麼兩樣,剛結束帶隊下山,劇烈咳嗽重病一場,來到診間求助。因慘烈無比,我幾乎沒什麼推拿的記憶。唯推到後段,因推拿師發現我身體明顯歪斜,順勢抬起一隻腳,踢</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">正</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我左側的骨盆──殊不知卻令昏死沉重的我瞬間醒來,莫名地哭了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">怎麼醒的?怎麼哭的?都搞不清楚。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那是一種非常奇怪的痛覺,比起痛,我感受到更多的,其實是朦朧的「苦」。苦太深刻了,要朦朧一點才能遺忘,才能被允許收存在身體裡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">被推拿到掉淚,通常與身體</span><span lang="EN-US">/</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">生命經驗的秘密有關,我沒去追究,卻很難忘記,推拿師這一腳。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「你會願意,再踢我一次嗎?」我抬頭,清楚地徵詢他的同意。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「好啊!」推拿師大方地加贈我兩腳。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「這次還好,骨盆沒特別不平衡。」他一邊踩壓一邊說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">再次被踢,我準備好了,除了兩側骨盆被踢的單點有明顯疼痛感,那失衡歪斜蒙昧混亂的糾結,和瞬間被矯正的驚異感,都消散了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">感受不到當初那股濃稠的墨黑,不太一樣,失去線索,我沒能靠近那個秘密。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">可是,好好喔</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">推拿師願意協助我兩腳,以核對上一回的感覺。能這樣被溫柔而有意識地對待</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">複製扶正</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,是我需要的。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這麼神清氣爽地回家。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">午餐時,想起推拿師說,會不會有天覺得人生就是如此,死亦足矣。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我想的卻不是死,而是生。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">最近常出現這種感覺:覺得這一世能降生為人,如此經驗世間,活著,真的很好!</span>......過去<span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">會出現這種感覺,僅限於異地的高峰經驗。而今卻變了。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這種驚奇感,非關登山遠遊時感受到世界的豐富、也不是特別活動中感受到生命的精采,而是一種,平凡的況味:極其細微,卻非常渾厚。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">比如早上和先生上山遛狗散步,下山經過傳統市場興起買一隻雞、一顆高麗菜和一條山藥,決定今晚煮燒酒雞。推拿完的中午,到街坊吃一碗滷肉飯和味增蛋花湯,看著窗外的陽光與街道,僅僅如此,便覺無比幸運奢侈。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">過去執著於追求獨特的境遇,以為只有尋夢的冒險才不枉此生。而今反倒在平淡從容的日常,能知覺微小而明晰的滿足,這是舊的我難以領會的幸福感。這樣的平凡,實則是一種輕鬆、一種穩健。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">真好,有新的我誕生,如同以推拿認識身體,一層深似一層。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這種幸福,我正慢慢品嘗。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p></div><p><br /> </p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-55123119685797605592023-10-10T17:48:00.001+08:002023-10-10T17:48:07.607+08:00如此奢華去走闖:屋久島之森<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFvgFhBj7DeVKe9oe8S3FJTPMSglIutb90UaSPnDoXNairD0vAP3Su8RJ5eoIskAnXzyVit32n7FpZEmSmrYqjrVHOeV-DRLlGyBZqWJH1tLlcnvEb9XCYujJH6T2TCRrV76IJdfipLhLnHQ9bZVm8x7h_1iXG2CuWJdHko2oBIPOvFU9e3eyV3o6-UX8/s1036/by%E6%9D%8E%E6%80%A1%E8%87%BB%20(6).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1022" data-original-width="1036" height="343" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFvgFhBj7DeVKe9oe8S3FJTPMSglIutb90UaSPnDoXNairD0vAP3Su8RJ5eoIskAnXzyVit32n7FpZEmSmrYqjrVHOeV-DRLlGyBZqWJH1tLlcnvEb9XCYujJH6T2TCRrV76IJdfipLhLnHQ9bZVm8x7h_1iXG2CuWJdHko2oBIPOvFU9e3eyV3o6-UX8/w347-h343/by%E6%9D%8E%E6%80%A1%E8%87%BB%20(6).jpg" width="347" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p>手繪圖|ida, 李怡臻</p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">醒來時,因驚見滿天星星而感到不知所措。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">夜空沉默閃耀,一場星鑽之雨無聲降落。起身看了看兩側,發現宏和小米沉睡的身影,才想起稍早四人拖著睡墊到這露台躺著看星星,宏談論太陽系與宇宙,滾滾數了好幾顆流星,我好像就是在他們時不時「流星!」、「流星,」、「又一顆!」的低喊間莫名睡去的……晃晃腦袋,緩慢清醒同時,見不遠處滾滾從廁所走出來的身影,我抱著睡袋走到廁間旁的休息亭,兩人坐在那裡發呆。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">凌晨一點,抓穩大退潮的時間點,四人來到平內海中溫泉。退潮讓溫泉池都露了出來,我和滾滾褪去全數的衣物平躺在溫泉池畔的石階上,上方仍是繁不勝數的星子。「我們在曬星星耶!」我說。溫泉裡的宏聊起星雲與蟲洞,而遠方是海。海浪一波波拍打著岸,即便隔有一段距離,仍能感覺到海的洶湧。幾個鐘頭後,現在所處的地方就會被漲起的潮水淹過去,這溫泉,會再度隱沒在海裡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">多麼可愛的地球。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那時沒人知道每晚要睡哪,四人僅有最昂貴的配備是租來的一輛小轎車,宏開車、小米看路、滾滾和我負責清點食物與裝備,一人一個大背包,這麼在日本屋久島的森林流水間,日日,餐風露宿。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">只因宏在台灣見了日本屋久島巨木的照片而流下眼淚,我們相約,來會會令他流淚的魔法──來屋久島爬山。準備走入宮崎駿《魔法公主》取景的森林,出發前,他們興高采烈相約作畫,說邊走邊畫,一定很棒。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「蛤?」人們免不了驚愕。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">真的喔,只要停下來,他們就畫!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">宏、滾滾和小米在沙灘上畫、在亭子裡畫、連泡溫泉也捧著畫……想當然爾,他們也將畫具和畫本打入大背包,負重入山。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">但我不想畫畫,不畫畫可以做什麼?我愛看他們的畫筆在紙上快速摩擦著什麼,專注的用眼睛捕捉偌大的世界。那手啊,在小小一方畫紙上來回梭巡──我享受這高速運轉的世界,在他們筆下盡數幻化為寧靜與安住。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">來屋久島的登山者,多數請當地嚮導帶路,我們沒這麼做,一般三天的短程縱走,宏直接拉長成九天。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「帥氣!」我欣賞如此篤定的闊綽。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">屋久島的森林很魔幻,終年濡濕的水氣使得林木苔癬皆青綠而氤氳,上稜後,連綿草坡上岩石錯落的景緻恍若台灣高山,走著走著就放聲高歌。前方他們三人走上了著名的黑味岳,我玩興來了,偏離正路爬上身側的大岩塊,準備起攀──嘿,跳到前面;喝啊!再躍向另一側……這裡一塊、那裡一塊,遇到岩隙就把身體塞進去,運用摩擦力繼續上升,等我上到黑味岳時,三人已好端端地坐在風裡畫畫了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">山坡起伏,大地母親的胸脯映照著天光雲影,雲霧快速地飄移,時間轉瞬即逝,或有片刻凝結。沒有人說話,他們全神貫注地畫,擷取八方不同角落,即使大風吹拂,仍有安穩的力量籠罩。我不忍打破,站在一旁,被他們的畫筆帶動。一呼一吸,隨天地同生,飄移的雲霧、山嵐與水流,呼吸流動之時,身體也不自覺跟著流動。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqOUL9QG2Xzf3HXq9NoU7T27GO5HD1DDK4aBgulduGHJaFhkWuzwN51cdSRSyRh-w1wUlv_ov5tFsOpgyNHbYHbjUFyQUiJo109X1h3PZr1mflf_m9rez-Nq_NOo5Xy-RQ5ZXqOeQBy92qQA1LK9uCjCj4eHtAhLMI1SA0n-VC-WxoRRltj0gQTXwqnCQ/s1146/%E9%BB%91%E5%91%B3%E5%B2%B3%E4%B9%8B%E4%B8%8A(by%E6%9D%8E%E6%80%A1%E8%87%BB).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1134" data-original-width="1146" height="344" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqOUL9QG2Xzf3HXq9NoU7T27GO5HD1DDK4aBgulduGHJaFhkWuzwN51cdSRSyRh-w1wUlv_ov5tFsOpgyNHbYHbjUFyQUiJo109X1h3PZr1mflf_m9rez-Nq_NOo5Xy-RQ5ZXqOeQBy92qQA1LK9uCjCj4eHtAhLMI1SA0n-VC-WxoRRltj0gQTXwqnCQ/w347-h344/%E9%BB%91%E5%91%B3%E5%B2%B3%E4%B9%8B%E4%B8%8A(by%E6%9D%8E%E6%80%A1%E8%87%BB).jpg" width="347" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒有畫筆,我只好用身體畫畫。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">雲在腳下走,我用身體走,我的畫筆就是我的身、我的念。那豈止是呼吸,意念乘風而行,行雲流水地舞,如果可以,願一筆相連、一念相連、峰峰相連,畫出這天地大美,揮灑一刻快意。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">風大天冷,小米穿起風衣、宏束緊帽子繩尾、滾滾把全身包得密不通風,他們在狂風中繼續揮筆──到底為什麼要這麼畫呢?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">想起小時候常玩的遊戲:「大風吹,吹什麼?」吹……人心深處一個純淨的靈光!比如飄洋過海來看島、比如夢的牽引和召喚、比如一代比一代更繁榮昌盛的森林、比如比如……請繼續畫吧,畫下世界三百六十度的微渺、畫下脆弱又堅強的渴望之心,若這當下有現實──宏吸著鼻涕低喊:「要回去嗎?」我怔忡盯著筆記本上的字,大風把書頁吹得快要散了……不甘願收拾起身,閃入巨石的另一面,此處竟全然無風,瞬間恍如隔世。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">次日,離開山屋前,靜悄悄只有我們四人。即將下山,想向這森林、山丘、小屋致敬與感謝……四人就在山屋內逕自辦了一場小小的畫展,說,給山神看。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三人把畫全攤開,就著陽光就著窗,一一擺出。我請他們拿出畫具陳列,還有地圖與登山杖……宏搬來大背包立在一旁,那氣勢還真煞有其事。滾滾趴在地圖上看路線,這路線誰說三天就能走完?這麼邊走邊畫,九天也不夠用……「我算過了,要十五天才行!」滾滾宣布,我哈哈大笑。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「這哪裡呀?」、「對,那時我們在那裡待超久……」、「原來你有畫這個!」回憶點點滴滴,小屋內一時頗為熱鬧。誰連台灣護照都掏出來?綠底金字有我們的名:中華民國。山神會記得我們嗎?盼祂知道島上的森林流水帶給我們多少力量。沒有三牲四果,這些畫、色彩、筆觸、文字就是供品,訴說著我們的感念與盼望。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGdoUeRC-AjWqUX8ZavEl6pU5_jnA211HJUEbeJfKzcGm88G6M0-rpy9SeFzO60-ELv_Y0MDrshrFakJzWwva50L3NiIYb06MH736wxr96q4DomaJ8ab6eMa97vY_qFC_o4U64w0j1pB_IgG55RHClUSJCRWzuo0mzmbpucZeMrObDPGNLohX_dazUFSc/s1871/%E5%AE%89%E9%9D%9C%E5%B1%B1%E5%B1%8B%E8%A3%A1%EF%BC%8C%E5%AE%89%E9%9D%9C%E7%9A%84%E7%95%AB%E5%B1%95.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1152" data-original-width="1871" height="223" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGdoUeRC-AjWqUX8ZavEl6pU5_jnA211HJUEbeJfKzcGm88G6M0-rpy9SeFzO60-ELv_Y0MDrshrFakJzWwva50L3NiIYb06MH736wxr96q4DomaJ8ab6eMa97vY_qFC_o4U64w0j1pB_IgG55RHClUSJCRWzuo0mzmbpucZeMrObDPGNLohX_dazUFSc/w362-h223/%E5%AE%89%E9%9D%9C%E5%B1%B1%E5%B1%8B%E8%A3%A1%EF%BC%8C%E5%AE%89%E9%9D%9C%E7%9A%84%E7%95%AB%E5%B1%95.jpg" width="362" /></a></div><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">若森林是島嶼的寶藏,我願一直爬一直爬一直爬,用雙腳貼平每一吋土地的呼吸,為島嶼和森林作傳,留下這些藏寶飛彈,發射到每個人的夢裡去。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">登山多年,未曾如此興之所至,無目的而為地作任何創作或紀錄。事實上,我們登山在乎登頂,抵達目標與速度追求極為重要,打卡宣告是常態;事實上,我們疏於森林養護教育,修伐樹木的做法多一再橫腰斬斷,屋久島這二代木甚至三代木的孕育風景,於我們而言如夢一場。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我所屬的台灣島,生活步調快捷且認真,車水馬龍是日常,土地卻莫名窘迫。屋久島之行告訴我,用勞力、耐心、和謙敬之心對待自然,山將以時間反應土地之富有。如同斷頭的一代木,終能生成二三代的巨木,無言的智慧與慈悲在空氣中發散,那是人與土地共創的,森林會涵養無窮清淨的流水,饋予世界。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKy8nuLi9pGgIr4dpJNXglkQVxZda4dSnZd94g5Eir3xNilUJFzLw-nrxNjCP1ZYFM7nt2gNJi9N_yAAjddVkxe_z2nBKhumlQ9k2y4gu0KYp8CQ2VWuobRe6sMlIqYkqP6Mwk3JMWglKj8_bONrTonRMwDQOsuHPgGm5kJRenqqdujU3CHUSBzhlfhyphenhyphenw/s1201/by%E6%9D%8E%E6%80%A1%E8%87%BB%20(5).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1054" data-original-width="1201" height="334" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKy8nuLi9pGgIr4dpJNXglkQVxZda4dSnZd94g5Eir3xNilUJFzLw-nrxNjCP1ZYFM7nt2gNJi9N_yAAjddVkxe_z2nBKhumlQ9k2y4gu0KYp8CQ2VWuobRe6sMlIqYkqP6Mwk3JMWglKj8_bONrTonRMwDQOsuHPgGm5kJRenqqdujU3CHUSBzhlfhyphenhyphenw/w380-h334/by%E6%9D%8E%E6%80%A1%E8%87%BB%20(5).jpg" width="380" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p>刊載於 <a href="https://www.newsmarket.com.tw/mag/13880" target="_blank">20230604上下游副刊</a></o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-64446094994245706122023-09-30T15:03:00.008+08:002024-03-06T15:12:27.643+08:00嗯哼,敏感是種超能力<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEvKLBEDKu4CanjdX9_sJYgw_aLjldfc-y4IjLVckj-lEH95zJ-U6KSzGFVaToWXmsfsyatdSbzgOYIr2ekf9CBIbvFMm-iQqAIOaH0ZnPFo9t7ijwuytIaHWm2kPejd85nu5E14EpclSpZF1uHTKv6u6-e5ydlsm1VLYB6NRuq_RX5PhdWX775uNxruU/s1448/%E5%B0%81%E9%9D%A2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1448" data-original-width="1288" height="339" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEvKLBEDKu4CanjdX9_sJYgw_aLjldfc-y4IjLVckj-lEH95zJ-U6KSzGFVaToWXmsfsyatdSbzgOYIr2ekf9CBIbvFMm-iQqAIOaH0ZnPFo9t7ijwuytIaHWm2kPejd85nu5E14EpclSpZF1uHTKv6u6-e5ydlsm1VLYB6NRuq_RX5PhdWX775uNxruU/w302-h339/%E5%B0%81%E9%9D%A2.jpg" width="302" /></a></div><p><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">那是南方窄巷內一幢兩層樓的老屋裡。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">大學畢業前最後一年,與登山社學弟妹相約到餐館吃飯,趕著要去飯局的我在房裡匆匆換裝,抽出一件衣櫃底層的內衣,揚起了細小的粉塵,老屋的塵蟎早已不是新聞,我不以為意,只記得到餐館後的笑語喧嘩中,身體開始發癢,我不予理會,想是天氣太熱,誰知愈來愈癢,不由得搔抓起難耐的胸口和上背部,一邊搔抓一邊談笑,直到我笑不下去,跑去廁所掀開上衣</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">──</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">大片的泛紅斑塊不規則浮腫在白皙的皮膚上,看得自己頭皮發麻。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">那是人生第一次過敏。過敏原不得而知,記得在皮膚科診所對醫師低吼:「為什麼?二十多年來都好好的,怎麼會過敏?」自認已把自己鍛鍊得健壯如牛了,我無法接受。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">不知身體什麼時候變敏感的,顯然我無法再繼續神經大條下去,全身紅腫熱癢的症狀將令我難以為繼。「妳遇到過敏原了,一旦開始過敏,之後就只能避免了。」醫生說得不慍不火,我卻一心只想回到過去。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">第二次發作,在一年後夏天的遠行,西藏高原的小旅店內,夜半過敏突然發作,急性蕁麻疹伸出爪牙,遍布全身,當時的男友見不得我在床上翻來覆去的痛苦,摸黑下樓,硬是去敲了大街上深鎖大門的藥店,拿了抗過敏藥物來。說也奇怪,吞下藥丸後,身體慢慢得到了緩解,我的呼吸從淺短急促變得緩而長,再狼狽不堪也昏昏沉沉入眠了。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">直到現在,我還記得那高原房間簡陋黯沉如荒原的蕭瑟感,遙遠的異鄉人生地不熟,唯過敏我愈來愈相熟。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">那一次我意識到,若要完</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">好</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">安適去流浪,必須自行生出應對策略才行。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">此後,抗組織胺與皮膚藥成為我登山旅行的必備藥物。我不知我的過敏原,種類繁複也不一定能檢測出,只藉由每次過敏的經驗檢視與回顧發現治療和緩解之道。有一年,連數週緊湊密集的行程,習慣遷徙變動的我幾乎在環島而不自知,在即將抵達台北的火車上,身體出現一種快要發癢的奇怪感受,像一隻蟄伏的獸蹲低了身子。而我已不是頭兩年對過敏徵兆無意識的我,不管三七二十一解除當下所有的束縛:外套、</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">內衣</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">、項鍊、手錶、髮束</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">……</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">接著關掉手上的筆電,閉目養神,安撫自己:「沒事沒事,會過去的。」</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">一直記得自己及早覺察那隻蟄伏的獸即將攻擊的微妙感受,並火速應對的果決。為了不讓其發作,任何能令身體舒服的方法我都願意嘗試。那頭獸確實因主人的緊急照護與回應,安靜地趴下了</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">──</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">安全過關,我發現了何謂前兆。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">此後,我知道自己不只對特定塵蟎過敏,過勞也會誘發。從最初的自怨自厭,到我將之視為一個忠誠的提醒:「這裡不適合我。」「太累了,再繼續下去就要過敏了。」</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">身體有個忠實的警鈴,分毫不差地點提我盲點與要害。可嘆我是個求好心切、勞碌奔波的工作狂兼苦行僧,只是急性蕁麻疹比我更狂更僧,如無私中正的頂頭上司,它若喊停,我就必須停。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">蕁麻疹的病因向來難以論斷,我只能研究與它共存之計。後來也不管成因了,只要發作,反正脫光趴平,請先生來往浴室不停更換涼感毛巾,每每浸了冷水新更換的毛巾鋪平在背上一瞬,我總感覺到某種僵熱緊窒奇異地崩解,那是過敏的身體,或許也是,過勞的自己。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">隨後多年,過敏沒來找過我。我得意忘形,以為自己終於懂得如何趨吉避凶了。像一隻躲在門縫裡探光的蝴蝶,不停振翅,一心飛往外頭那沒有禁忌不用在乎太多的世界。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">去年秋天,大院跑來一隻小黑狗,怎麼趕都趕不走。仗著一臉無辜,先生和我宅心仁厚,萬般無奈下養了,開啟毛小孩的人生新篇章。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">養狗一個月後,身體安安靜靜地,在某個不期然的時分,自前胸後背的軀幹,開始了一片片微微隆起的紅腫。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">嗨,好久不見,蕁麻疹!</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">依慣例降溫緩解、吞抗組織胺,然而熟練的招數卻不管用了,過敏退了又發、發了又退,這是過去不曾發生過的事。夜半,過敏嚴重干擾睡眠</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">……</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">我一邊搔抓、一邊貪睡,愈抓愈燥熱,踢掉被子不多時又打噴嚏,又熱又冷要逼死誰!</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">乖乖去皮膚科掛號,醫生聽聞過敏已逾一週,直接打針,再開另一種抗過敏藥物</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">……</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">一個月裡,我看了三間皮膚科診所</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">,</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">挨</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">了三四五支針,那些扎進手臂的針筒一支比一支粗壯,裡面都裝著亮晃晃的液體,卻無法壓制過敏反應,一點點也沒有。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">已鮮少吃西藥打針的我,冷冷看著五顏六色的藥丸,自動斷藥。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">多害怕,過敏原是狗毛。然而就算離家多日過敏亦未見緩解,狗毛是否對身體造成威脅始終無法判別。那個月這麼昏昏沉沉地過去,夜半總是搔抓,忍耐著、死撐著、歹活著。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">我變了,過敏也變了。多年不見,過敏不再是急驚風而成了慢郎中</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">……</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">我的急性蕁麻疹,轉為慢性了嗎?</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">那段時日只要看到狗就覺得委屈,憑什麼不能接近牠?可是我害怕,我怕了狗,過去一個月曾那麼認真地對待彼此,當一份真誠的愛變成了恐懼與懷疑,誰都會無所適從。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">「難道,我對愛過敏嗎?」我對浴室鏡中的自己苦笑,困惑且絕望。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">頹喪地與先生說了這個想法,廚房裡正切菜的他輕描淡寫地說:「這是壓力。」我驀然轉身,他命中了什麼?「對,這是壓力</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">……</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">是壓力讓我過敏!」我像找到關鍵鑰匙一樣驚駭。事實上,是我選擇讓自己產生壓力的</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">──</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">為了愛,我以對方需求為優先,而放棄了自己。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">如同做了一個深長的夢一樣恍惚,「從來不知道,這會是壓力</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">來源<span lang="EN-US">……</span>所以我不一定是對狗毛過敏<span lang="EN-US">……</span>」我喃喃。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">「妳是對養狗的壓力過敏。」先生停下了切菜的動作,抬頭看我,意味深長地笑了。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">我站在廚房裡,看著先生的臉,怔忡了不知多久。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">是的,那是情緒性壓力誘發所導致的慢性過敏,難怪吃藥打針都無效。重秩序的我對狗有過多關愛、要求以及控制,耗費超越個人能負荷的時間去訓練與陪伴,忽略自己真正的需求而不自知。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">老天,這樣也不行?</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">對自己無意識地施加高壓,身心失調,壓力有多大,過敏時程就有多長。這類型的過敏,唯有紓解壓力、平衡情緒,才可能復原。堅韌的意志完全發揮不了任何作用,必須想辦法讓自己輕鬆自在才行。然而,那對一個用盡力氣只求完美與優秀的女孩,是多麼艱難啊。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">這一<a style="mso-comment-date: 20230606T1600; mso-comment-parent: 1; mso-comment-reference: A_2;"></a><a style="mso-comment-date: 20230522T0942; mso-comment-reference: MOU_1;"><span style="mso-comment-continuation: 2;">年</span></a></span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">春天,帶美濃當地小學的孩子登山歸來,因是農村第一間實驗學校首度嘗試高海拔山野教育,說沒有壓力是騙人的。下山回到家,走進浴室洗臉,身體就在那</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">個時刻,分秒不差地,大小不一的紅色斑塊靜靜地浮腫出來,一塊、又一塊。我看著過敏的部位失笑,開始用冷水擦拭,安撫身體的過程中我對身體恭敬低頭:那些與校方的協調溝通、登山系列課程的規劃與執行、家長同意書和身體健康保證書的簽署、山間突發的意外摔傷處置<span lang="EN-US">……</span>綜合性高</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">壓在鬆一</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">已修正</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">口氣的此刻,身體安靜而緩慢地,起乩了。整整一個月才平歇。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">過敏是身體的魔界展演,由不得我。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">親愛的身體,妳要我對自己有</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">多誠實?多重進化與提點,只求我如實接納自身的敏感與脆弱,連抗壓都要設停損點──無</span><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">上限抗壓曾是我的優勢,而今降低壓力才是真正的挑戰。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">奇怪的是,我不恨我的敏感,我愛她,而始終相信敏感是一種超能力。過敏機制不過是對這種超能力的守備,讓我更清楚自身的細微精緻。若能與超能力合作,了解如何守護自己,就可能以此道覺察並守護身邊的人事。那是強大的安撫與鎮定之力,能游刃有餘在臨界內運作。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span style="color: black; font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">身體就是一個魔法學院,而我不孤單,有妳一同修習。</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: black; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><b><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">蕁麻疹:<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal">
</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 150%; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><b><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">俗稱「風疹」,是免疫系統過度反應的表現。身體會出現膨疹,紅腫、發熱且搔癢難耐。依發作時間分有急性與慢性,急性來得快去得也快,若反覆發作長達六週以上,即為慢性。依發作部位可辨識嚴重程度,通常自四肢或軀幹開始蔓延,範圍可擴散至全身,一旦蔓延至頸部或臉部,要非常小心,須留意上呼吸道水腫可能致使呼吸困難。一般來說只要避開過敏原即可,然則過敏原之多,從飲食、蚊蟲、花粉、動物唾液或其他不明原因等皆有可能,若不經檢測,要靠患者仔細觀察記錄生活習慣去發現。蕁麻疹有誘發性,特殊刺激也包含心理壓力,過度敏感的身體,會影響作息和生活品質,學會好好照護自己也是種福氣。</span></b><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p></div></div><div style="mso-element: comment;"><div class="msocomtxt" id="_com_2" language="JavaScript">
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</div>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-39741041354882911652023-09-30T12:29:00.006+08:002023-09-30T12:31:15.049+08:00把生命的力量唱出來,就是療癒 (致米莎)<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuD4-QV3-SS48AQ5IyFNFk1totMBvjY0cfDZuKyenqkYnOC8ZIGpGLlpukk0aiBXcci48vdNZKNTES4OOVIHzHcL9WTDP10Ic-tGTnJcLBnC_jsBs7VnL9wf4q1ELel1I3pw4FiFAQ0vHtRObz0V465klfeUlUlHBEC8KWCAkhIn8f_eMa5Jw5fVnRFDQ/s1366/20230403%20(5).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="905" data-original-width="1366" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuD4-QV3-SS48AQ5IyFNFk1totMBvjY0cfDZuKyenqkYnOC8ZIGpGLlpukk0aiBXcci48vdNZKNTES4OOVIHzHcL9WTDP10Ic-tGTnJcLBnC_jsBs7VnL9wf4q1ELel1I3pw4FiFAQ0vHtRObz0V465klfeUlUlHBEC8KWCAkhIn8f_eMa5Jw5fVnRFDQ/w346-h229/20230403%20(5).jpg" width="346" /></a><span style="text-align: left;">photo/亨利</span></div><p></p><p><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">清晨,夢見妳。</span><span face="新細明體, serif">醒來,知道自己掛心妳的演唱會。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">無意識下潛之後,意識浮了上來,許多畫面湧現。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我們揹著大背包一邊爬山一邊聊創作,聽妳談起量子力學。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">美濃街上我騎著機車載妳去吃豆花,妳在後座的風中跟我談數學,妳說:「數學很美,跟文學一樣。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我碎念起科學與宗教的衝突,妳笑了:「到最後,可能是同一件事。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">於是喜歡跟妳散聊各種我所不了解的理科頭腦與心靈,讀建築出身的妳最後投身於音樂創作,而妳曾嚮往於醫學,妳說年輕時妳理想的職業是法醫。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">法醫,有聽過欸,那是幹什麼的去了?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就是熟悉病理學,幫人驗屍、查明死因的工作。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">好險妳沒去做,不然我們就少了米莎的音樂可以聽了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">妳的書房有各種各樣魔幻寫實廣羅天地的漫畫小說,也有博物學、植物學、哲學、生命科學,不乏偵探、塔羅和占卜,那一面書牆要說是神鬼傳奇絕不誇張。在想像力與閱讀之外,魔羯座的妳其實務實無比,一塵不染整齊乾淨的居家空間、精選食材的冰箱、手作木櫃與層架,在在彰顯生活的堅持與踏實。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">成為創作者之後,我慢慢知曉,除了作品,若能對創作者本身有更深的認識,了解其創作之外的生命質地,是一種加持。腳踏實地能的生命力能確實浸潤作品,有更深廣的力量傳播。文本是、音樂是、歌聲亦是。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那是一種紮實的地氣;而創作是一種靈氣,靈氣與地氣相合,就能打通任督二脈。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是聽妳的歌,會有個感受。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">即使我們相熟,妳的作品於我而言仍是獨立的。每當生活失去目標委靡困頓,或工作滿檔過度努力便尋不到出口時,我會停下來,播妳的專輯,一邊掃地一邊聽歌,那些大膽或幽微的吟唱、飛天遁地上窮碧落下黃泉的歌詞,隨音樂緩緩流瀉,歌聲成為醫藥,陪伴著教人重新呼吸。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">是的,妳是法醫,用音樂撿拾人們斑駁脆弱奄奄一息的靈魂碎片,慢慢撿拾拼湊,唱成完整的歌。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有人稱妳為療癒系歌姬,妳不以為意。我卻明白那是什麼。早期人說妳是民謠派,妳撇撇嘴,爵士搖滾藍調雷鬼妳都玩,把音樂當調酒,不將自身納入所謂分類,不輕易被定調,風格多變,其實妳不過是認真超越每一個當下的自己。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">將精力全赴投入於工作上,並對其充滿信心,完全對應在我們的對話上。「我就是有這個價,絕對可以做到好。」稜線上的大風中妳如是說,我看著妳,震動於妳十足的自信,杜鵑也搖擺。我在妳身上,學到姿態。妳會蹲下,觀望多刺妖嬈的高山薔薇,不停讚嘆:「好美喔!」又抬頭遙望高空的雲朵,不停嚷嚷妳多愛看雲。我搖搖頭,只覺妳跟它們真像。迷人而不可侵犯、徜徉天際而瞬息萬變,這樣的靈魂,就是要和高山薔薇、大空之雲相呼應呀!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米莎的專輯之所以具療癒力,歌會奔馳,因為充滿想像並容納暗影,不只是</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">客語女歌手</span><span lang="EN-US">”</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而已,這定義與分類太過狹隘甚且粗暴,就像把阿爆的音樂納入排灣族音樂一樣簡略,這會讓民眾失去判斷的能力,米莎的音樂是跨域的、藝術性而又充滿生活感,在虛構與現實間遊走,呼應腳下的土地,也傳喚內在的荒原。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米莎能唱,真好!</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">好險沒去當法醫,我到底要說幾遍</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">從民謠版《河壩》、流浪《在路項》、暗黑系《百夜生》、世界病了</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="background: white; color: #202122; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Arial;">《戇仔船》</span>到迂迴扶搖百哲不撓的《蝓螺》,這些創作之路能凝鍊成一場演唱會,並不令人意外。</p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這不是去台北客家音樂中心聽客語歌這樣子而已好嗎</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">請小心定義,因為文學也有科學的眼,科學也有文學之美哪。若因此錯過一個生命、一個強健團隊集體靈光和力量的傳遞,那會很可惜喔。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">10/1</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">晚上,明天,北部有空的朋友們,今天是購票仍具優惠的最後期限,去現場感受這跨域的精神與力量吧!</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這我心目中極富力量的女歌者,創造一個團隊,帶著客家文化的色彩,迸射出極具現代感和藝術性的華麗的生命演繹。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">---<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">[</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: "Cambria Math";">演唱會資訊</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">]<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▮</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">時間:</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">2023.10.1</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">(日),</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">19:00</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">~</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">21:30</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">(</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">18:30</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">開始入場)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▮</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">地點:台北市客家音樂戲劇中心(台北市中正區汀州路三段</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">2</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">號)</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▮</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">主演:米莎的山鬼窩窩</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▮</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">主唱</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">米</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">莎</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">貝斯、鍵盤</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">早川徹(</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> <span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/toru.hayakawa.351?__cft__%5b0%5d=AZUKskiJrBqwuIwh8EfuwpSWn_u6_H02mdXqXxkXClnTVtYMPhvk0iQkSrz0dr1EK3MzuLHZmOO_I_AUn2h2Af09BO6_-4yK3TNkMtshitsUKV3ivjBP_kWn9xlZuJd0apQJ0C4WkefxEndDesFPpXoG&__tn__=-%5dK-R"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: blue; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Toru Hayakawa</span></a></span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">吉他</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">大竹研(</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> <span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/DaZhuYanKenOhtake?__cft__%5b0%5d=AZUKskiJrBqwuIwh8EfuwpSWn_u6_H02mdXqXxkXClnTVtYMPhvk0iQkSrz0dr1EK3MzuLHZmOO_I_AUn2h2Af09BO6_-4yK3TNkMtshitsUKV3ivjBP_kWn9xlZuJd0apQJ0C4WkefxEndDesFPpXoG&__tn__=-%5dK-R"><span face=""新細明體",serif" lang="EN-US" style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: blue; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit; padding: 0cm; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;"><span lang="EN-US">大竹研 </span></span><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: blue; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Ken Ohtake</span></a></span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">鼓組</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">福島紀明(</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> <span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100005352975303&__cft__%5b0%5d=AZUKskiJrBqwuIwh8EfuwpSWn_u6_H02mdXqXxkXClnTVtYMPhvk0iQkSrz0dr1EK3MzuLHZmOO_I_AUn2h2Af09BO6_-4yK3TNkMtshitsUKV3ivjBP_kWn9xlZuJd0apQJ0C4WkefxEndDesFPpXoG&__tn__=-%5dK-R"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: blue; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;">Noriaki Fukushima</span></a></span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▮</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">客席樂手</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▮</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> <o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">薩克斯風</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> <span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/minyenhsieh?__cft__%5b0%5d=AZUKskiJrBqwuIwh8EfuwpSWn_u6_H02mdXqXxkXClnTVtYMPhvk0iQkSrz0dr1EK3MzuLHZmOO_I_AUn2h2Af09BO6_-4yK3TNkMtshitsUKV3ivjBP_kWn9xlZuJd0apQJ0C4WkefxEndDesFPpXoG&__tn__=-%5dK-R"><span face=""新細明體",serif" lang="EN-US" style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: blue; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit; padding: 0cm; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;"><span lang="EN-US">謝明諺</span></span></a></span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">(</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">Minyen Hsieh</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">管子</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> <span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000130135656&__cft__%5b0%5d=AZUKskiJrBqwuIwh8EfuwpSWn_u6_H02mdXqXxkXClnTVtYMPhvk0iQkSrz0dr1EK3MzuLHZmOO_I_AUn2h2Af09BO6_-4yK3TNkMtshitsUKV3ivjBP_kWn9xlZuJd0apQJ0C4WkefxEndDesFPpXoG&__tn__=-%5dK-R"><span face=""新細明體",serif" lang="EN-US" style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: blue; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit; padding: 0cm; text-decoration: none; text-underline: none;"><span lang="EN-US">黃博裕</span></span></a></span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">(</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">Huang Po Yu</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">小號</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">鄭立偉(</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">Leeway Cheng</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">▯</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">艾斯拉吉琴</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">:</span><span style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"> </span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">若池敏弘(</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;">Wakaike Toshihiro</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: #050505; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ascii-font-family: inherit; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-hansi-font-family: inherit;">)</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-pagination: widow-orphan;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #050505; font-family: "inherit",serif; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI Historic"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt;"></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-76115867882088496262023-09-20T11:24:00.004+08:002023-09-20T11:25:03.855+08:00尋鄉的孩子<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjio7E3CAQ4FteEIW93nIp4HOaqLhkcpuUTZb7NI9klkn2rhvN_4Uz6r3jFrW1iV9DmF5pfo1tBGU13cNYAYIVxOiPislu0isUpeFwhCtxJXKwW_aZSITUKBLfUzER_rIO_fcHLI07tJ7ZEmb4uJ1NnftBSHwaIq2arnycF3AmQR7IA89nUw0xBeXgcCA0/s1721/20230403%20(6).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1140" data-original-width="1721" height="229" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjio7E3CAQ4FteEIW93nIp4HOaqLhkcpuUTZb7NI9klkn2rhvN_4Uz6r3jFrW1iV9DmF5pfo1tBGU13cNYAYIVxOiPislu0isUpeFwhCtxJXKwW_aZSITUKBLfUzER_rIO_fcHLI07tJ7ZEmb4uJ1NnftBSHwaIq2arnycF3AmQR7IA89nUw0xBeXgcCA0/w346-h229/20230403%20(6).jpg" width="346" /></a></div><br /><p>photo/亨利</p><p><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">瑋傑在台上唱著,這裡是美濃雙溪母樹林。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">山腰上的雙溪小棧被在地組織標下來管護了,人們有更多的權利自主決定森林的樣子。人力吃緊的狀態下,村民仍舊按自己的節奏和網絡,將舞台盡其所能地搭建得防風雨且貼近自然。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">舞台搭建的協力設計是小飽,我的先生,老家在彰化,卻把美濃當家一樣認同,比我更期待慶典的到來。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而瑋傑終於回來了,寫了歌出了專輯,在地同輩如我與其說擁戴,不如說盲目地愛著支持著,疼惜彼此,是這個意思。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這片樹林藏有許多在地長者的童年,至少在我的想像中是如此。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一個在地慶典讓許多人到來,老家苗栗三灣的米莎受邀來歌唱,她已經唱完了,卻在瑋傑的一首歌中臨時加入合音,我是聽聞米莎的合音時在後台找到她的。這後台呢,也沒多後,就在樹林邊側,我戚身到她旁邊坐下,她合音告一段落,順勢坐到我身側,說:「瑋傑好厲害!」口吻由衷,忘了她是說什麼好厲害了,我只聽到純然的讚嘆,同為歌手創作者,對彼此的欣賞。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">此刻我誰也不是,只是一個在地聽眾,坐在大後方,大力鼓掌歡呼,和莎莎</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米莎</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">口耳聊著那些日常。我們都是來工作才相遇的,而我們也都期待參與黃蝶祭好久了,有個相熟的歌手在台上為大家服務,瑋傑人聲吉他口琴輪番上場,我坐在那裡,風吹過來好涼,幾隻黃蝶在陽光下飛舞,方才演出和連日奔忙令身體濕黏且發痠,但此刻,我坐在這裡,放眼望去可見諸多相識與不相識的朋友,作一個單純的參與者,一邊聽歌,一邊和莎莎在角落亂聊,心裡踏實。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">天熱,我把脖子上沾黏的髮絲撥掉。莎莎見了,「我來幫妳綁辮子好了!」她一說,便要我轉身,讓她結辮。我有些錯愕,從未讓人綁過辮子,這當下好友卻自動插刀。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那時間不長也不短,我這麼坐在一張紅色的塑膠椅上,米莎的手俐落地將我的長髮分成三股,午後有風,在瑋傑的歌聲中,濕黏散亂的髮絲就這麼被整理紮結,一條麻花辮這麼成形。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">多希望時間可以更慢啊,瑋傑再唱久一點,莎莎妳的手再緩一些,讓我多品嘗這舒暖溫馨的片刻更長一點……有那麼一瞬間,我搭乘時光機,回到童年的穿堂上,台上有我喜歡的朋友、台側也是我喜歡的朋友,我在台下,沉默平凡,看守這悠遠流長的和煦日常,編一條辮子的時間像燒一炷香的時間。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjE17iohIyXHzi4eHDP_g3tAbK4d29FlF3bQCzgcv_yUBVolBp71lxbQZPcGv60A-JPqRqHl4xKGBCUiKg0OzyInTNIbX5aYV7pwfiMyrwY1SgPX2VIJEHAre-yIN7J6VM_3QqAUCJm5KYt7ZubKPQm0XxOah8TCjg7Qz7v_UY-An3q4rSdmanrcMsNDa0/s1951/20230403%20(5).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1292" data-original-width="1951" height="226" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjE17iohIyXHzi4eHDP_g3tAbK4d29FlF3bQCzgcv_yUBVolBp71lxbQZPcGv60A-JPqRqHl4xKGBCUiKg0OzyInTNIbX5aYV7pwfiMyrwY1SgPX2VIJEHAre-yIN7J6VM_3QqAUCJm5KYt7ZubKPQm0XxOah8TCjg7Qz7v_UY-An3q4rSdmanrcMsNDa0/w341-h226/20230403%20(5).jpg" width="341" /></a></div><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">編完了,我有點捨不得,又不能拆了再叫莎莎重編,一轉身,瞥見不遠處有個阿姨在偷拍我倆。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">瑋傑唱了〈半山謠〉,他今天唱得特別好,那不是他作的歌,是家族傳遞的歌,歌聲嘹亮悠遠,歌聲幾乎送到先祖那一端。莎莎的身體搖擺,我聽得如癡如醉。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">混雜在諸多同鄉異鄉的人潮中,我們都是尋鄉的孩子。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而我一定要寫下這一刻,為瑋傑的歌、米莎的義氣合音、我的長辮,謝謝有個美濃,讓我們相識同在。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-51910819899752522492023-09-14T15:57:00.018+08:002023-10-10T17:40:04.183+08:00在祖先與我之間:客家藍衫(3)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEosOmTpQjOmobnuCXz59AvbUE0-IE2LDerCoJ0K22gwpi6CCshbB5PtBVPcQ32hzosX6885a85N6SidEuIS6gYnErdd6GlvBBrxSe_FKq3oBp6X_wogujiR7UkNh3yVvw8Wkuj_GEg2q--UdVvZ0Bf50wuhPtQ7sZlUQpAxbwJogBlLTf_v3C_VPMtfE/s1479/377095227_2936212659848544_3734593358957206988_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEosOmTpQjOmobnuCXz59AvbUE0-IE2LDerCoJ0K22gwpi6CCshbB5PtBVPcQ32hzosX6885a85N6SidEuIS6gYnErdd6GlvBBrxSe_FKq3oBp6X_wogujiR7UkNh3yVvw8Wkuj_GEg2q--UdVvZ0Bf50wuhPtQ7sZlUQpAxbwJogBlLTf_v3C_VPMtfE/s320/377095227_2936212659848544_3734593358957206988_n.jpg" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #999999;"><span lang="EN-US">Photo/</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">謝謝士毅,拍下喜歡的自己、喜歡的朋友,影像的力量無遠弗屆</span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">坐在高鐵站候車室,閱讀著從高雄美濃圖書分館借來的《女兒紅:大襟衫與女紅特展》,認真讀著,只是一字一句對客家女性的讚揚讓我坐立難安,為了解與製作改版藍衫,我得把書看完,可是有難度,按耐著性子繼續看,竟覺得……想吐。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我站起來,晃晃身體,揮動涼冷的空氣,看看高鐵站的人潮,要自己冷靜。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">傳統客家婦女穿著藍衫,一輩子黑褲裝為勞動付出,至死方休。研究發現,過去年長的客家婦女,晚年有機會做人物肖像的遺容彩繪時,會為自己挑選下半身著黑裙,而這黑裙,也就是入殮的服裝。多數學者推論,約莫是女子一生沒機會穿裙,此刻若能自主,多半選擇裙子。因一生不停止工作的能幹與勤快令國內外學者對客家女性豎起大拇指,堪稱民族女性典範,不知為何,我卻在這盛讚中感到眩暈,又為自己的敏感感到羞赧。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">最初只是為祭儀舞蹈想為自己做一套改版的客家藍衫,而今知道愈多,不知為何壓力愈大。那包袱是集體女性的傳統框架,若我脫框,我能依循什麼?</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那兩大匹布已在靜文老師的陪伴下染好了,接下來是設計。設計師米粒同為客家女兒,年輕時在Levi’s外商公司一待十多年,遇工作瓶頸憶起高中時期縫紉老師一句勉勵的話,毅然走回服裝設計老本行。返鄉美濃後自創品牌,近來也接舊衣改造。她告訴我她最不想做的就是藍衫,除了極其費工,也因為──我們都覺得藍衫不好看。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而今人們穿著藍衫,均為文化意義。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米粒工作室內,另一位女客人湊巧聽聞我們的討論,趴在桌上喃喃:「對啊,藍衫好醜喔……」我瞪大眼看她,她敢說?!原來不只我一人這麼以為……那個午後,我提及藍衫裡頭藏著客家女性求生存的諸多養成,我很矛盾,米粒與她沒多說,只是嘆氣,那幾口氣,背後是多少難言的明白。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米粒問我,想做什麼樣的客家藍衫?我回答不出來。只好像研究生一樣去讀書,連《台灣客家文化創意產業藍衫服飾設計與評選之研究》的碩論都找來看……米粒一起看一起討論。但我們並非要充滿設計感與藝術性的服飾開發,我們要生活,不想放掉客庄勞動的基本地氣,衣服要有生活味,不只表演,其他場合也能穿,才是親切。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">如此挑戰傳統,會憂慮長輩評價是正常的,其所費不貲的藍染布,也充滿壓力。主辦單位邀請做祭儀舞蹈時並無要求著藍衫,我給自己這個功課,其演出經費根本不足支付藍染和設計成本,把靜文、米粒、連自己的荷包通通拖下水,到底所為何來?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">為了重塑集體女性的價值、美感、意義。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因為身為女性、身處客庄,所以我們撩落去。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">隨後我發現,她們不是老師,是戰友,不惜付出、不計代價。米粒不說,但我感受得到,她承擔了什麼、決定了什麼。黃蝶祭典前的那一週,我不知道她有沒有不眠不休。米粒既開工,之於工藝、美感與舒適感的追求,無人能出其右。有時,我能感受到我們不顧一切的奔赴,除了彼此的情誼,更多是對自我身分價值與性別認同的自主性開闢。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">闖,闖出傳統與現代交融的一片天。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">要做一件式還是兩件式?該不該五襟齊長?是否在乎袖下縫份的倒向規定?蘭干是什麼?扣子要結繩扣、珍珠扣還是金屬扣?刺繡要用卡片織還是機織?工作桌上,米粒把藍染布攤展開來,什麼都不懂的我們煞有其事地討論。像瞎眼的孩子懵懵懂懂地摸著一頭老象,深信我們會慢慢摸索出來。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米粒瘋狂製衣的那幾天,我已進入五日的後生創作營,日間課程結束後夜奔她的工作室,推門遇見她的黑眼圈,為了不讓舞者在跳舞時穿幫,她卯起來再做一套內搭的藍染現代洋裝!藝術與勞動原來是同一回事我終於明白。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">靜文並未因她藍染工作結束就退場,仍時刻關心。米粒的藍衫舞衣一做好,即伴我入翠谷的黃蝶伯公前祭禱,這位已離異閩籍客家媳婦,恭敬端上一盒新鮮水蜜桃,伯公前細語,說的是客家話。「從沒聽妳說過客家話……」我驚訝地看她,她神祕地笑了,多少生命故事,任其流過。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span lang="EN-US"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgMWmmAYco0uQcIfNgnkkjDdEOw1bpXZPtpFttJDmKL3Mm-9QZuc-885paqkMJY2JfBViH3jri5eMBLVGXMUryXaO2Etw22WK36wpppF_GpdGIRNjrWWmpD1T-kotWg4H26jHsj_cFHdWSHvhpVoyD0wK3jbUtquJaEtqJd5jOIVnsN6e5Tk8DR11VP_c/s1582/%E7%A5%AD%E4%BC%AF%E5%85%AC%20(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1582" data-original-width="908" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgMWmmAYco0uQcIfNgnkkjDdEOw1bpXZPtpFttJDmKL3Mm-9QZuc-885paqkMJY2JfBViH3jri5eMBLVGXMUryXaO2Etw22WK36wpppF_GpdGIRNjrWWmpD1T-kotWg4H26jHsj_cFHdWSHvhpVoyD0wK3jbUtquJaEtqJd5jOIVnsN6e5Tk8DR11VP_c/s320/%E7%A5%AD%E4%BC%AF%E5%85%AC%20(1).jpg" width="184" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjij5Mxve5PrLbPXp-OMSaCTLQfMnwHc3aKmwOFOfXm5gYSnzYLuam3GIgZBm1DpApvtZWTEMaivoMhiMp7CIjyd4qO9-Keov8KlwUdYSE0kjdgT7452rHcMNS72OXY-ZQZD08oCcLdi2ePhWXA7u0mTY_lnq_G2v8r680fQF1zpocprM9yc_AWW4uaNtw/s2016/%E7%A5%AD%E4%BC%AF%E5%85%AC%20(3).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="908" data-original-width="2016" height="144" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjij5Mxve5PrLbPXp-OMSaCTLQfMnwHc3aKmwOFOfXm5gYSnzYLuam3GIgZBm1DpApvtZWTEMaivoMhiMp7CIjyd4qO9-Keov8KlwUdYSE0kjdgT7452rHcMNS72OXY-ZQZD08oCcLdi2ePhWXA7u0mTY_lnq_G2v8r680fQF1zpocprM9yc_AWW4uaNtw/s320/%E7%A5%AD%E4%BC%AF%E5%85%AC%20(3).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">所有客家女性祖先們:</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這個時代很好,我們能想穿裙子的時候,就穿裙子。我們有時間細敲慢磨,製一套想望中的藍衫裙。這是女性的覺醒與聯手,才有的勇敢。我們的時代,還會繼續推進,我們會更自由、更美,並不忘勞動的精神與價值。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOemzQNG7ReJl2nlIrG2fYOyPqe5tikDqW6p34J8HVrMWaFWpp39GPufvpWbNjYbRHNu4ePufMX1eYDuYqcYTsB4nYC0NHi9OLsG2b95ckde7YFDj18DK1HG3FGYcHYD3qHaZ05nRgGDbH2S2-39thELV2okWG8SlY9ZziKznvr89qBkSUqk5FDftBoqM/s1479/%E5%85%A7%E6%90%AD%E7%8F%BE%E4%BB%A3%E6%9C%8D%20(2).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOemzQNG7ReJl2nlIrG2fYOyPqe5tikDqW6p34J8HVrMWaFWpp39GPufvpWbNjYbRHNu4ePufMX1eYDuYqcYTsB4nYC0NHi9OLsG2b95ckde7YFDj18DK1HG3FGYcHYD3qHaZ05nRgGDbH2S2-39thELV2okWG8SlY9ZziKznvr89qBkSUqk5FDftBoqM/s320/%E5%85%A7%E6%90%AD%E7%8F%BE%E4%BB%A3%E6%9C%8D%20(2).jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br /><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">溪畔跳舞的時候,這套舞衣是我的守護神,有靜文</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">藍染</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">、米粒</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">設計</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">兩位老師的拼命、集結看不見的祖先的眼睛。一支長長的黃荊在手,那是美濃媳婦佳蓉清早採來的,高舉這趨吉避凶的祝福,我便無懼。陰性傳統的存在,如腳下的水流,不曾止息。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「</span><span face="標楷體"><b>河流 遼闊流過<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>春天 靜靜守護<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>有人在黑夜裡頭點燈<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>從那日 世界開始有光<span lang="EN-US"><br />
<br />
</span>田地 家園 祖先走過<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>老屋 故事 我們來守護<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>有人在黑夜裡頭點燈<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>從那日 世界開始有光<span lang="EN-US"><br />
<br />
</span>跟隨時間的腳步 走千年的路<span lang="EN-US"><br />
</span>我們跟隨時間的腳步 走千年的路</b>」</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b><span face="標楷體">──〈</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">跈等</span><span lang="EN-US">/</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">跟隨</span><span lang="EN-US">/Following</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">〉米莎</span></b><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face="標楷體" lang="EN-US" style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我會永遠記得,祭儀舞蹈結束後,主祭者溫柔的神情。回市集一路上,舉凡見到的師長伯叔都對我頷首微笑,那滋味陌生而驚奇。唯我知曉,我只是一個代表,人們歡喜、感動甚且流淚的,其實是這背後長長的故事與祝福。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「保留傳統式的右襟開口、長版寬腰身、闌干、五福臨門數的釦眼、袖口反折的黃色、合脖圍的領口、兩側的開叉在腰線以上。把小立領、寬大的袖子都去掉,袖口加上象徵性的黃色,在開叉內貼邊也用黃色處理,可以跟袖口的黃色做連結,不讓袖口的黃色太孤單。裡面做成一件式洋裝,在抬手動作時才不致於曝光,讓穿者舒適。裙片做成</span><span lang="EN-US">8</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">片裙,這是我唯一覺得失策的部分,當時可能在考慮其他的細節,就沒有想到保留完整的圖案</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "Cambria Math",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math";">⋯⋯</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Cambria Math"; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: "Cambria Math";">」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">設計師米粒寫下,活動結束後,她要求我再將舞衣送去,因為還想要改得更好。我想起那天深夜工作室內,她看著我試穿這新版舞衣的欣慰之眼,彷彿一切辛苦都值得的,如母親如姊姊的微笑。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkcpbOcPEkyzz-OFPyhsTVM1V9O6tuvwL4L9om4hwS8MUQf4ML5Nrfiy27cwlFeQ3-8F6QfHrdc_RjSCeXP2vC7KqaJS-eDvtGnQgqwxcWaS-N-PDOP8mn1yjYghE_0AMK7pGBvvGwpa7aXTmrcAXGsWrZUqz3x245RjdhekkLYA_zdpV1_PtXCYL4bac/s1479/%E7%B1%B3%E7%B2%92%E8%88%87%E6%88%91%20(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkcpbOcPEkyzz-OFPyhsTVM1V9O6tuvwL4L9om4hwS8MUQf4ML5Nrfiy27cwlFeQ3-8F6QfHrdc_RjSCeXP2vC7KqaJS-eDvtGnQgqwxcWaS-N-PDOP8mn1yjYghE_0AMK7pGBvvGwpa7aXTmrcAXGsWrZUqz3x245RjdhekkLYA_zdpV1_PtXCYL4bac/s320/%E7%B1%B3%E7%B2%92%E8%88%87%E6%88%91%20(1).jpg" width="240" /></a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibYIq72drb7_-VFRnt7ZvGdY-pdvfRz7T_weWXEcrGwHHzOdGDKa4vnRbq7QS5xYRyB3DbhV1k5sgBz4chwZUYk745PGBEglmO2TF7v7Zv0czadTsdw_tR1FoDVP8hBctOzD5tpNrRnyK_Pq5687WK_nsMPlJ3mE5pFHijfd0VVsRrUUz5APgL7DsFYv8/s1479/%E7%B1%B3%E7%B2%92%E8%88%87%E6%88%91%20(2).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibYIq72drb7_-VFRnt7ZvGdY-pdvfRz7T_weWXEcrGwHHzOdGDKa4vnRbq7QS5xYRyB3DbhV1k5sgBz4chwZUYk745PGBEglmO2TF7v7Zv0czadTsdw_tR1FoDVP8hBctOzD5tpNrRnyK_Pq5687WK_nsMPlJ3mE5pFHijfd0VVsRrUUz5APgL7DsFYv8/s320/%E7%B1%B3%E7%B2%92%E8%88%87%E6%88%91%20(2).jpg" width="240" /></a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCAHiTTfO8tt8zUCSxO7kWOsms8gEdO0TD3oGSVm13gJspKJO0VrkaWo2aX0CW5xHF8How_WdK_GTd8_yS6FIsQx1ZsRxtf53shI5TxWSZaf8pf0K3FFp8DXKUSTAT6HWjHYk6HoI_Q0r6SWQMrjma-KMUVnPJfG8p9BrkSJtc5wVUqlsRS7nC-iVcsm4/s1479/%E7%B1%B3%E7%B2%92%E8%88%87%E6%88%91%20(3).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCAHiTTfO8tt8zUCSxO7kWOsms8gEdO0TD3oGSVm13gJspKJO0VrkaWo2aX0CW5xHF8How_WdK_GTd8_yS6FIsQx1ZsRxtf53shI5TxWSZaf8pf0K3FFp8DXKUSTAT6HWjHYk6HoI_Q0r6SWQMrjma-KMUVnPJfG8p9BrkSJtc5wVUqlsRS7nC-iVcsm4/s320/%E7%B1%B3%E7%B2%92%E8%88%87%E6%88%91%20(3).jpg" width="240" /></a></div><br /></div></div><br /><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><b><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「</span><span face="標楷體">等你從四葉草的外形、氣味、種子,</span>認識四葉草的根、葉、花在四季的狀態之後,你就會曉得它的真名,明白它存在的本質,這比知道它的用途還重要。</b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><b><span face="標楷體">你的用途是什麼?我的用途又是什麼?</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">」</span>──《地海巫師》<span style="text-align: center;"> </span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="text-align: center;"><br /></span></b></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我不再想吐了,因為我們如此翻轉了我們自身。</span>用途是其次,更重要的,是人存在的本質。</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face="新細明體, serif"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkAZcjjbL3X3ad5xRWDhQSSisTiqM98tXw06wQDC-R1tJLACV4opfZK_ssRPRwy-Pu3Hw0uHlg9DGrjjzwp3ouDubBPHzXeZa3-YH1Nc5yeGA4n8qY2ycu1v3tKMpyiFkWNKoQ7dyovbFsXyW_ymnscJWLt8Axi_oqLxqqcNd946x0NGxUtUPqFf-n-YA/s1479/%E8%97%8D%E8%A1%AB%E7%8D%A8%E6%8B%8D%20(0).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkAZcjjbL3X3ad5xRWDhQSSisTiqM98tXw06wQDC-R1tJLACV4opfZK_ssRPRwy-Pu3Hw0uHlg9DGrjjzwp3ouDubBPHzXeZa3-YH1Nc5yeGA4n8qY2ycu1v3tKMpyiFkWNKoQ7dyovbFsXyW_ymnscJWLt8Axi_oqLxqqcNd946x0NGxUtUPqFf-n-YA/s320/%E8%97%8D%E8%A1%AB%E7%8D%A8%E6%8B%8D%20(0).jpg" width="240" /></a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI2-nSyYqF6Xo84JhmRs8e6GB4BHKescHZCeKAfVkJIX6HwvZrp3OZOkL4amSJ1_JHSSOuRqy2vLtL0fpkPZjymp9iISc_HUv8wu7SdDkpgNhQ7fd66MOCLgiitAM9VU9AGeOfbiGCEufxToigVHBEAvcyt1f3o-L8O5DSd57zP4JcBXBVCnMU63Ry7Zw/s1479/%E8%97%8D%E8%A1%AB%E7%8D%A8%E6%8B%8D%20(6).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI2-nSyYqF6Xo84JhmRs8e6GB4BHKescHZCeKAfVkJIX6HwvZrp3OZOkL4amSJ1_JHSSOuRqy2vLtL0fpkPZjymp9iISc_HUv8wu7SdDkpgNhQ7fd66MOCLgiitAM9VU9AGeOfbiGCEufxToigVHBEAvcyt1f3o-L8O5DSd57zP4JcBXBVCnMU63Ry7Zw/s320/%E8%97%8D%E8%A1%AB%E7%8D%A8%E6%8B%8D%20(6).jpg" width="240" /></a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: right;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0deauv1GPNGM7z1BiyeqKIQfYa0gFoOuH9isxCamBjeY9DqiQFcefxIU4Rim1lfhkpf3TUWLW1KcsRel91kX6Y6rCPmjAN5t4a8YOIKE-0CJoPQoBeqz8lDgEW74JHK7D4eNDe0Qrev4ClVno4KjMXSwETGGAcubUiDsE5HnexcOWekbS6-2LFYQhgvI/s1479/%E8%97%8D%E8%A1%AB%E7%8D%A8%E6%8B%8D%20(7).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1479" data-original-width="1109" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0deauv1GPNGM7z1BiyeqKIQfYa0gFoOuH9isxCamBjeY9DqiQFcefxIU4Rim1lfhkpf3TUWLW1KcsRel91kX6Y6rCPmjAN5t4a8YOIKE-0CJoPQoBeqz8lDgEW74JHK7D4eNDe0Qrev4ClVno4KjMXSwETGGAcubUiDsE5HnexcOWekbS6-2LFYQhgvI/s320/%E8%97%8D%E8%A1%AB%E7%8D%A8%E6%8B%8D%20(7).jpg" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: right;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: right;"><br /></div></div></div></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">================================================</p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一起織就:</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">洪靜文</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三分顏色布工房</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">、黃金緣</span><span lang="EN-US">(MH</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">米粒手作雜貨</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">、張卉君</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">祭儀舞蹈發想邀請</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">、米莎</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">祭儀歌曲歌手</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">、蔡佳蓉</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">黃荊提供</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">、劉逸姿</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">傳統藍衫提供</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">特別感謝:</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">攝影楊士毅</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">原請幫忙拍合照,這藝術家強烈要求拍攝更多影像留下</span><span lang="EN-US">)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></p></div><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA0mdtQw-Q8KTli4KeGtJvxSZhFLGUIJqncHO1fq1BgIlq0ccxkS6CcQoxCxOgxydvMJ5fEBA-Cf--cQnpPvccjutbiY2ZX-406687Dsw7E-GKAs019P1bc3ZwhoN7QCQNusXdJgZcpO1CzqsMiu04JZSBSK4kGN9hgmOlXyQHMDPcnkBidAC5vCb1XG4/s1479/%E6%9C%89%E4%BD%A0%E7%9C%9F%E5%A5%BD.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1109" data-original-width="1479" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA0mdtQw-Q8KTli4KeGtJvxSZhFLGUIJqncHO1fq1BgIlq0ccxkS6CcQoxCxOgxydvMJ5fEBA-Cf--cQnpPvccjutbiY2ZX-406687Dsw7E-GKAs019P1bc3ZwhoN7QCQNusXdJgZcpO1CzqsMiu04JZSBSK4kGN9hgmOlXyQHMDPcnkBidAC5vCb1XG4/s320/%E6%9C%89%E4%BD%A0%E7%9C%9F%E5%A5%BD.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br />崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-69139771524272276312023-08-30T16:52:00.002+08:002023-08-30T16:54:22.923+08:00推拿(68)_留白,是對自己的溫柔<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi15OJcu0OdVdl8ORhHYyr1oS0iMoYPI9t9CkIn0fl7JOCtf7wDztv5gXdveSrwH3Kpw9qX-xIRjaCE7WJfGDo9uUbr1nZ0cZFjO3l4T0GbvRaNF-_6RMrQRgraKLhuLbBCMlq0OpF5U8nu2y_Xb5-T1uLzlISLfEq9xNTnsXx5VPZefD6St398gHiX-dU/s3500/markus-spiske-nySx4ztA7Ek-unsplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2333" data-original-width="3500" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi15OJcu0OdVdl8ORhHYyr1oS0iMoYPI9t9CkIn0fl7JOCtf7wDztv5gXdveSrwH3Kpw9qX-xIRjaCE7WJfGDo9uUbr1nZ0cZFjO3l4T0GbvRaNF-_6RMrQRgraKLhuLbBCMlq0OpF5U8nu2y_Xb5-T1uLzlISLfEq9xNTnsXx5VPZefD6St398gHiX-dU/s320/markus-spiske-nySx4ztA7Ek-unsplash.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p>「你怎麼不問我為什麼這麼久沒來?」我問推拿師。</p><p>「我幹嘛問妳?妳一定有妳的原因。」他挑眉。</p><p>「蛤,原來你不會在意喔……」我喃喃。</p><p>有些事,總是要核對才知道自己的推測只是想像,那純屬個人的生命議題。比如我把推拿師當老師,以為自己是不認真做功課的學生,很久沒來上課該需要解釋,殊不知推拿師不放心上,他尊重我的選擇我的節奏,他何必擔心?!</p><p>直到現在,我都在我的好學生情結裡(可惡,推拿師看我的眼怎麼有點憐憫……)。我唯恐自己不夠好,而今推拿師不停提醒我,我的身體比我想像得好。他的強調於我只是安慰,我還不知他說的是真相。</p><p><br /></p><p>按完了右手之後,他說:「手臂瘦了很多,肌肉都不見了……」</p><p>「瘦不好嗎?」我問。</p><p>「我只是說我的發現,沒說這樣好不好。」他回覆。</p><p>「喔。」</p><p>可是我最近被人說瘦,已經說到煩了~~~</p><p>前陣子投入黃蝶祭,全神貫注,就算有時間吃也吃不太下,心神聚焦在工作與團隊上,飯量變少,加上半年來沒多少運動,會瘦很正常。直到黃蝶祭結束一週後,才有辦法慢慢吃回正常的飯量──這大概是了解自己的一種過程。</p><p>「妳的身體很聰明,忽胖忽瘦,變化快速,身體用它的方式在支持妳啊。」推拿師的聲音中肯,單純陳述一個事實。</p><p>事實上,他說我的身體”聰明”很多次了,我從不相信。但這一次,我忽然能接受了,思及過去種種,比如大學時代加入登山社頭兩三年,胖了10公斤;比如我一投入活動,短時間內會迅速瘦下來,這忽胖忽瘦的體質,過去不曾細想意味著什麼,而今才明白原來身體一直配合主人的目標與重心去改變,這變化,是為了支持主人要做的事──這樣的身體,很聰明。</p><p>「……如果我的身體給我這樣的支持,那麼我可以怎麼支持她?」呃,四十歲才體悟身體聰明的我,是不是很笨?</p><p>「……少一點批判,多一點感謝吧。」推拿師頓了一下,說。順勢請我換邊側躺。</p><p>「可以……不要這麼犀利嗎?」我一邊調整身體,一邊咕噥。</p><p>側躺後的我,閉著眼,腦袋裡浮現「批判」那個詞,不知為何心裡酸酸的。</p><p>是呀,我一直都在批判自己,連不來推拿,都碎念自己不對、判斷身體一定變弱了。</p><p>瘦是自然,切合當下生活型態,因為這階段我不需要肌肉,所以顯瘦,需要的時候,肌肉會再長出來,就像當年學爬山就長胖一樣。這樣去想讓我平靜,那比「崇鳳,妳太瘦了,要吃多一點啦!」這樣的嘮叨要好得太多。</p><p><br /></p><p>許久沒來推拿,卻一點不陌生。這段時間刻意放手臉書發文的習慣、不練身體、不做功課,反正遛狗散步、開車晃蕩、泡腳睡覺,不是那種很有意義的生活,不為完美主義奔忙,竟慢慢安於自處,那是一種很奇怪的鬆緩,像雨後的夜晚,讓人舒服。</p><p>推拿師按到我的背時,背不再如過去防備,他的手勁下來,推揉、按壓,我聽見背部以一種「正常」的反應回應推拿師,不朦朧、不抵抗,一切「正常」,推拿師給什麼,背就回應什麼,這一推一收、一呼一應是怎麼回事?我背部的肌群,和推拿師的手,像一場來回順暢的抽球,或像跳舞……背不再難纏,它平凡如斯,願意被牽動、被理解、被處理……敢情這些多一事不如少一事(沒推拿)的日子,我有什麼自己沒覺察的變化到來嗎?</p><p>推拿結束後,我讚嘆推拿師泡的茶,意識到味覺復甦之美妙。</p><p>嗯,我復甦的,還有其他。</p><p><br /></p><p>「這一次,我的背是不是沒那麼緊?」</p><p>「不,妳的背很緊,比手更緊。」</p><p>「……難道患部緊繃程度並不是影響推拿順暢與否的關鍵?緊不緊是一回事,身體是否處於防衛或屏蔽狀態又是另一回事?」</p><p>「對,可以這麼說。」</p><p>老天,我不知道自己的變化:我鬆下來了。</p><p>空白(沒推拿)的這些日子,反而讓我了解到,我需要的正是留白,不再追著認真、意義、有、好……這些價值跑。久久不來也沒關係,這次來,狀態其實不錯。推拿師想不到有什麼能提醒的。</p><p>最美的提醒,是留白,留白對我的溫柔。</p><p><br /></p><p>「喔,這個不可以寫出來!」我叫道。這不告訴人常推拿不一定有效嗎……</p><p>「妳這麼說也是對的,這樣我們會沒生意!」推拿師哈哈一笑,「但確實如此,事實就是,許多一直鍛鍊、一直精進的人,最後都走入了這裡……」</p><p>積極求進步,其實對身體無形中產生壓力,人們不自知──我還真以為,身體若要好,該常鍛鍊、常運動、常推拿,勤能補拙。殊不知這是外求,不間斷向外抓取證明其努力,以維持標準,唯恐退步,我要健康快樂,給我!再給我!</p><p>忽然明白,為什麼有些人不停上課、頻繁參與各種工作坊,花了很長的時間,心裡的傷仍無法復原──只因仍是外求,付出金錢與時間不代表身心能真正整合,關鍵還是個人如何面對自己、如何調整安頓自己的生活。</p><p><br /></p><p>「這可以寫,這需要被寫出來,因為太多人不知道了。」推拿師說。</p><p>到底是外求答案、還是內觀自覺,才來這裡診療?看似一模一樣的過程,卻是完全不同的兩種作用力。一味求好求療癒,身體沒準備好、心神亦不定,我想過去自己多少中了這樣的毒,與其說好學生情結,不如說,不全然想為自己負責,只好外求蒙蔽自身表示努力。外求久了,麻木是正常的,因為答案從來不是醫師/老師/治療師給的,答案只能自己找到。</p><p>真好,留白,原來是對自己的溫柔。空下來,才能好好呼吸。</p><p><br /></p><p>謝謝,這杯茶,真的很好喝。</p><p><br /></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-28017439095383768772023-08-16T17:49:00.001+08:002023-10-10T17:56:29.732+08:00我庄,土地種出來的歌<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEKaIKrhTT9LPMU37Hr7K8xfOATZ9F6dvQplP-0LGdAT-NcLW8HpsjCECphkNm72zdyeCKgTc7YFDag-9YdgSmOl7JT2MFrnsdWa79MOUOTv3Xv8b0tfig-weaO65us-V2IcQM_Bqrz20-qnXbBYXRi7HFQnbx0brF99Kkz0TqDInZTN91oEwCz9BH8RY/s1171/%E6%9E%97%E7%94%9F%E7%A5%A5%E7%9A%84%E6%AD%8C%E6%96%87%E6%9C%AC%E5%88%86%E6%9E%90.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="709" data-original-width="1171" height="194" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiEKaIKrhTT9LPMU37Hr7K8xfOATZ9F6dvQplP-0LGdAT-NcLW8HpsjCECphkNm72zdyeCKgTc7YFDag-9YdgSmOl7JT2MFrnsdWa79MOUOTv3Xv8b0tfig-weaO65us-V2IcQM_Bqrz20-qnXbBYXRi7HFQnbx0brF99Kkz0TqDInZTN91oEwCz9BH8RY/s320/%E6%9E%97%E7%94%9F%E7%A5%A5%E7%9A%84%E6%AD%8C%E6%96%87%E6%9C%AC%E5%88%86%E6%9E%90.jpg" width="320" /></a></div> 圖片|2023/8月號聯合文學雜誌<br /><p><br /></p><p> <span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">挽著先生,帶著爸爸、媽媽和阿姨,自停車處走往衛武營國家藝術文化中心。晚風微涼,我卻緊張且微微興奮著,若非爸媽和阿姨自小於美濃長大,我絕不會動念領他們走進戲劇院聽生祥樂隊的《我庄三部曲》。我家長輩不懂古典樂,更不懂鄉音結合搖滾的新民謠實驗音樂,他們只是努力工作到都會打拼,養孩子長大成人,出身美濃,卻不熟悉生祥的音樂。與其說女兒體貼,請家人到場體會客庄文化新驕傲,不如說女兒私心想藉這機會,用生祥樂隊的新音樂陪伴家人,回到屬於他們記憶中的故鄉。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是衛武營戲劇院,卻有鄉音流轉,人均著正式服裝,人腳均是皮鞋包鞋高跟鞋,沒有花布衫或汗衫,沒有雨鞋和泥巴。我想知道,這之間有何共榮共存的可能性?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我庄三部曲登場,《我庄》、《圍庄》、《野蓮出庄》,土地的生長之聲,人民的行動之歌。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">交響樂飽富新意的序曲讓全場瞬間恭敬又優雅,而我始終難以想像,生祥樂隊如何交疊於其上?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">「東有果樹滿山園<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">西至屻崗眠祖先<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">北接山高送涼風<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">南連長圳蔭良田<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: 標楷體;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">春有大戲唱上天<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">熱天番檨拚牛眼<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">秋風仙仙河壩茫<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">割禾種菸又一年……」</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-fareast;"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-fareast;">我父親母親距文學遙遠,更不解民謠或史詩,戲劇院的絨椅上端坐,驀地聽聞家鄉話自一個同鄉晚輩唱出,短短數句,美濃田地的氣韻與溫度,瞬間滲入涼冷的空調。每一句,都帶出一個熟悉的畫面,部分我未曾參與,但父母親也許記得,春有大戲唱上天,夏天芒果拚龍眼,裡頭可收藏了他們的童年?</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">「思想起──我庄圓滿<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">起手硬事,收工放懶<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">滾滾沓沓,像一塊新丁粄」<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">幾句詩化的歌,牽勾童年如粢粑(客家麻糬)黏嘴,彷彿看見阿媽(祖母)在大院中忙進忙出的身影。而今在高雄大都會,「新丁粄」像遙遠的通關密語,敲響原鄉記憶:那是家中有人添丁時方製作分送的紅龜粿,其圓滾紮實,帶有喜氣與祈福的寓意,如我庄勞動生產的圓滿。這冷門的語詞,聽得懂的,會微笑;聽不懂的,就此認識客家傳統。歌不是書,但我們能藉由生祥的歌聲,讀取到一個農村的質樸和豐盛。若非認識生祥樂隊,我不知能如此解析美濃、創新美濃,以音樂為名,呵護顯化其族群,又融化族群與族群。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">若不是清楚生祥樂隊的鄉音之美,我不會約母親前來,聽一曲永豐思念母親的〈化胎〉。記憶溫暖,如家屋後、祖墳後、伯公壇後方隆起的土丘,溫潤可親、厚實可靠。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「</span><span style="font-family: 標楷體; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">願阿姆煲介交工粥(想母親煲的換工粥)<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">佢講介笑科<span lang="EN-US"> </span>年下燜介封肉(她講的笑話<span lang="EN-US"> </span>除夕燜的燉肉)<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">頭擺事像雜草交春(從前的事像雜草春至)<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: 標楷體; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">一日靚一寸(一日長一寸)</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">……</span><span style="font-family: 標楷體;">」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那是所有客庄孩子應許的熟悉感,挾帶著濃濃食物的氣味,如一種集體默契,出門討生活再辛苦狼狽,你知道,家中有人等你。這我在異地飄遊最常放的曲目,如定錨一般撫慰浪子。席間我忍不住往媽媽和阿姨座位的方向望去,她們是否,也在生祥歌中想念著她們已逝的母親,我的阿婆?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">阿婆的手藝好,無巧不巧,《我庄三部曲》之中的《野蓮出庄》正是以食物為主角的專輯,一首歌代表一種食物,比如阿婆很會做的〈芋仔粄〉、比如阿媽經常做的〈對面烏〉(破布子)和〈菜乾〉,每當聽生祥唱起家鄉的食物,不管在車內房內或音樂廳內,那味道就會撲鼻。若飲食文學是讀字遙想,那麼飲食歌曲就是聽歌聞香,加以時調皮時滑順的各種樂聲,真能從一首歌中,品出客家飲食細瑣的生活畫面,而後流出手作的時光長河。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">演唱會上半場如搖籃般溫暖,下半場則飽富壯闊的行動意識。我庄將孩子養大成為知識分子,不只反水庫,也為其他農村遭逢的疼痛,書寫和歌唱。石化工業為中南部帶來哀歌,〈慢〉、〈南風〉唱給彰化大城的台西村。無巧不巧,先生正是彰化大城人,他老家三豐村距台西村,不過短短十分鐘車程。寡言木訥的他曾獨自趕赴國光石化大遊行,聽著〈圍庄〉,眼神複雜,他不懂客語,但懂那些憤怒和堅持。我想起他帶我去看老家那邊的海,一片死寂。明明在劇院中端坐,卻嗅到那一端隱隱的惡臭。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">於是《我庄三部曲》每一曲都命中我、家人、以及伴侶。作一個美濃在地後生,那歌中的運動精神與原鄉氣韻時刻影響著我,過去將耕耘機送上演唱會舞台發動,而今把嗩吶置入兩廳院和衛武營與交響樂團合奏。音樂不只能欣賞,它能撫慰、能召喚、能顛覆、能戰鬥,它像火一樣燃燒年輕世代,也如風一般在樂廳上叫人蕩氣迴腸。當音樂以歌、以詩入耳,聽者在想像中建構農村印象、應聲感受、從而尋找意義,那麼歌便擁有了文學的力量,那樂聲譜出的,正是一個又一個的文本,似章回小說,層層疊疊,漸次而上,古典樂守護故事的底蘊,樂隊闢出鄉野的草根性,詩人永豐若是編劇,歌者生祥就是說書人。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「媽,妳覺得好聽嗎?」散場後,我找到家人們,忙不迭問。媽媽喃喃:「好聽啊……如果他繼續唱,我還可以再聽。」我看著錶,就快晚間十點……母親意猶未盡,欲言又止;阿姨在一旁微笑,眼中有話;父親背著手,緩緩踱步。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這樣就夠了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">且讓我繼續聽他們說書吧,聽著聽著,這麼慢慢長大、變老。這同步見證的家人友人陌生人會愈來愈多、愈散愈廣,其深邃的野韻,就從這小小的客庄美濃,緩緩,唱出去──</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /><span lang="EN-US"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi05o0jOwpUQlimIrTYSZ4E54FxYq_NXsJZjCUP9fOiNGJRMW1W0PFzPwEzgqeZ-qOaYSq0GALmqMcNGPYbD3DtKtrax6p3YLwyrzRtVheJEcu3UT1MlBVIyvQxv9064Ek-dIk3uER-5qAInAyJjrqGkMjAr6aftmfcCE7tRsxzCsrCbvOLHU4vD9CmpgQ/s1170/DSC_3166-2-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="709" data-original-width="1170" height="194" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi05o0jOwpUQlimIrTYSZ4E54FxYq_NXsJZjCUP9fOiNGJRMW1W0PFzPwEzgqeZ-qOaYSq0GALmqMcNGPYbD3DtKtrax6p3YLwyrzRtVheJEcu3UT1MlBVIyvQxv9064Ek-dIk3uER-5qAInAyJjrqGkMjAr6aftmfcCE7tRsxzCsrCbvOLHU4vD9CmpgQ/s320/DSC_3166-2-1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div> 圖|8月號聯合文學雜誌,林生祥<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p><p><br /></p><p>刊載於<a href="https://www.unitas.me/archives/42155?fbclid=IwAR1a7ppa-xb-AzArBwdxkmpRnKB1n1pCDO_81c_iYz3AlBaYJpvhyhWQahk" target="_blank">202308聯合文學雜誌</a></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-39070543349084627462023-08-12T23:41:00.000+08:002023-10-10T17:57:19.330+08:00推拿(67)_雞胸這回事<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5bYxvm6x4ZKV0WHqZ5fdFnB77TfPjXQHauc9_sxi3kyjVPbOwPA-6WYh3zhTE4FnqYv02hCq1a0EP43U2XMarIJ6YA2hvA3p_uS03SjmDQHubuIvjOwcZYnN7BBDY1Pt7fBPZxAiDGew6neX_hZ49e5kwLOJdaPXThBY7QEVrji83KhxlotcrLBmLz9s/s1280/photo%20by%20PIXABAY.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="853" data-original-width="1280" height="276" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5bYxvm6x4ZKV0WHqZ5fdFnB77TfPjXQHauc9_sxi3kyjVPbOwPA-6WYh3zhTE4FnqYv02hCq1a0EP43U2XMarIJ6YA2hvA3p_uS03SjmDQHubuIvjOwcZYnN7BBDY1Pt7fBPZxAiDGew6neX_hZ49e5kwLOJdaPXThBY7QEVrji83KhxlotcrLBmLz9s/w415-h276/photo%20by%20PIXABAY.jpg" width="415" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">photo by <strong style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #475671; font-family: Helvetica, "PingFang TC", 微軟正黑體, "Microsoft JhengHei", sans-serif; font-size: 18px; letter-spacing: 2px; text-align: left;">PIXABAY</strong></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">很久沒來推拿了,我不乖。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">之於乖巧,似乎是從很小很小的時候開始就要努力的方向。所以即使長大了,無人再約束我,內在還是有個嚴厲的老師,要求乖巧,若不符標準,會被批判不乖。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">作為女生,開始有性徵時,也就是胸部。母親帶我去買內衣,那年代走進內衣店買胸罩總使我感到羞赧,胸罩太小羞赧、太大奇怪,那鋼圈明白管束我胸部成長的形狀,很小的時候我便意識到,我的胸部不是我的,是大家的,這社會有一種美要我去達成,若沒能達成,我會感覺羞恥與無措。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">母親疼愛我的方式,是花錢買好的物資給孩子</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">儘管她對自己吝嗇</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,所以她會帶我走進的店都是黛安芬、華歌爾、思薇爾……我對胸罩怎麼穿不是很懂,卻對這些名字並不陌生。意識上,我知道店裡的東西一定是好東西,但不知為何,無論我怎麼試穿,都不容易穿到我覺得舒服的胸罩。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">試穿時,媽媽不會跟我進試衣間。需要幫忙或穿起來不舒服時,進來的都是專櫃小姐,鋼圈很硬,她會教我盡量把胸部都塞進鋼圈裡,因為肉要集中,我集中了啊,還是不舒服,她站開來看,說,沒問題喔,這樣才好看。媽媽會在外頭喊著:「怎麼樣?」</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我走出來,搖搖頭。那再換一件、再換一件,我看著女人在店裡團團轉,麻煩小姐奔忙也看到母親等待,我不知道為什麼鋼圈那麼硬還要穿,當女生為什麼一定要穿胸罩?我胸骨的中央,始終有難言的壓迫感。換穿了五、六種款式還嫌棄,至終我,只好開始說服自己,其實不難穿。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">學會忍耐,學會乖。忍著那堅硬的鋼圈壓制肋骨中心點,上廁所時,我會偷偷用手把胸罩中央鋼圈拉離我的胸部一下下,鬆一口氣呼吸。我覺得胸罩不好穿,但還是穿。我好困惑為什麼女孩們都穿著胸罩在學校自在地走來走去。如果她們可以,我也要可以才行。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">直到遇見運動內衣,最初幾年母親陪我買的胸罩被我束之高閣。胸型的漂亮只有一種標準,我不願再符合標準,置身事外穿運動內衣多年,逐漸淡忘肋骨被緊箍的感受。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">後來,我連運動內衣也不愛穿,能不穿內衣時我就不穿,這可能招惹非議、被嘲笑、被譏諷、被批判,說,不知檢點。我會擔憂,但會想辦法挑那些看不出來到底有沒有穿內衣的衣服。這大概是不需要穿胸罩的男生永遠不會有的煩惱,其實,我很羨慕男生可以激凸。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這一次,推拿師按壓我的正面,在胸前肋骨中央會合處。「咦」了一聲,「有盔甲。」他說。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我一時沒反應過來,那盔甲是什麼?他微微施力按壓,我沒有感覺……或說,我說不出到底有沒有感覺,我感覺不到我的感覺。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「嗯,不然我把手放著就好。」推拿師說完,順勢穩定的,將手掌直放其上,避開了乳房,我感覺胸骨那一點被護住,一片溫暖,一片朦朧。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">事實上,我遺忘了太多過去,那盔甲是什麼,我是直到現在才想起來的。想起來時,眼睛微微起霧。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">日前朋友來家裡過夜,我拎起一件最近新買的細肩帶白上衣給她看,而今如</span><span lang="EN-US">UNIQLO</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">都會貼心地將這類型的衣物內建罩杯,卻不知為何我買另一品牌的這件,內建罩杯穿久了會疼痛,就在肋骨脊心處……這又不是鋼圈,已經多少年沒遇見這感覺了?朋友看了看衣物,再摸摸我的疼痛處,說:「崇鳳,妳肋骨中央會合處是突起的,妳知道嗎?」我像聽見了一個遙遠的鐘聲,那朦朧感又來了。我看著她:「蛤?」「每個人的身體不一樣,妳比較瘦,這樣的胸骨,不適合硬的罩杯,會痛很正常。」她摸了摸那細肩帶內層縫好的胸衣說。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">四十歲,我才知道是胸骨脊心突起</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">俗稱的雞胸</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">的結構所至,讓我難以適應多數內衣。卻從十二、三歲開始,我就逼自己適應鋼圈,被壓迫的感覺辛苦,我卻希望自己跟別人一樣。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而今我知道,推拿師說的盔甲,是什麼了。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal">當年在試衣間,我怎麼不喊母親進試衣間看看我的無所適從?那些不舒服的忍抑,都被女孩用乖巧與漂亮塘塞,藏在盔甲裡啊。</p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p><p>
</p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-11485691846152818432023-07-01T22:01:00.003+08:002023-07-17T21:30:38.778+08:00染,染出來,涵容全新的未來:客家藍衫(2)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3zzH2lV7wjBUsb3K4Jql6t-b0s2Dc5yynO8Rl106RwyWuPQh1D31rJdwXE3EjvYq5Ad1bd1HGxYAgyN0KM17BWRpzSX-31ze33AkV4LlByHKs7TOpIWhHZQzM6IEBIceZUDoD2VzjnYPm6zU9JqtRLqVJ14OifrgtnhzsOg6xZmeQrkKUKyfWPEa5siA/s2016/001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1134" data-original-width="2016" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3zzH2lV7wjBUsb3K4Jql6t-b0s2Dc5yynO8Rl106RwyWuPQh1D31rJdwXE3EjvYq5Ad1bd1HGxYAgyN0KM17BWRpzSX-31ze33AkV4LlByHKs7TOpIWhHZQzM6IEBIceZUDoD2VzjnYPm6zU9JqtRLqVJ14OifrgtnhzsOg6xZmeQrkKUKyfWPEa5siA/w400-h225/001.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><p><br /></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space-collapse: preserve;">我遲到了五分鐘,驅車到靜文家前,看到她插腰站在庭院的背影。我沒叫她,因為那背影蓄積著全然專注的能量,像變形前的預備,發散出女戰士的氣息,讓人印象深刻。</span></p><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">彼時,我不知藍染兩塊10呎的布,到底有多麼費工。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">單純想為黃蝶祭祭儀舞蹈做一套藍衫改版的舞衣,藉此和傳統價值對話。要從傳統對客家女性的盛讚「針頭線尾、鍋頭灶尾、田頭地尾、家頭教尾」(從縫衣的細活到精良的廚藝、從田裡的勞動到家裡的相夫教子)中轉化蛻變,迎接後現代獨立自足的各種面容,就從改造傳統服飾開始吧。思及現代化學染因速成和廉價顯得粗糙,我想重拾藍染,可是我不會,想起靜文,她是在地藍染多年的師傅,我要找一位導師陪在身邊。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">生命何其奧妙,靜文來社大跳過一學期我所開設的自由舞蹈課,我也去社大上過一學期她所開授的植物染課。互為師生的緣分,讓我們能相互交流彼此的想法,非關技藝與創作,而是故事。我說靜文,我對客家藍衫之於女性的傳統期待並不舒服,妳陪我染布,教我用手跟水說話,染出屬於我們現代的新視野好嗎?</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">靜文說好,她的眼裡有光,談及在美濃當客家媳婦的既往,一位城裡來的閩籍女子嫁來客庄,連田埂都不太會走,關於她的適應以及改變,她說了好多好多過去,婚姻、夫家、主體性的失去與重建,河流一樣流著流著,故事有集體的影子,不同的情節有相似的疼痛,我看著她的眼睛,一併看見我母親和祖母的……彷彿在那一瞬間,知道我的行動不只是我的行動,也包含靜文自己的,她願陪我做這件事不只為支持晚輩,也回應她自身對未來的盼望。那跨越客籍、跨世代的集體情結,會在這行動中得到釋放。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">兩塊10呎(設計師米粒指定)的布,一是輕薄的六十支棉,一是較軟而沉的縲縈。在我到來以前,靜文已先行將兩塊布「精煉」──含納染布前置的所有細工,如此上色才會漂亮。我以為我需要的是一位導師,後來在靜文敘說與行動的神情中發現,她更像是一位母親,帶著女兒,介紹植物與水的種種奧秘,並藉由重複性的身體勞動去實踐。她掀開染缸時的微笑,像一位身懷絕技的女術士打開代代相傳的寶物,那般神秘與驕傲。她站在大塑膠盆前用細長的竹竿攪拌著染料與水,不停攪拌的身形和韻律,與盆內湧生群聚的泡泡互相呼應。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">「啊,我知道了,這是不是就像麵包師養酵母一樣?那就是養酵母的大缸!」我指著那缸嚷嚷。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">白淨的布攤開來,服裝設計師米粒(另一位美濃女兒)來訊說,請我們染一條河流給她。我想靜文專業的嘛,交給她!誰知她盯著我,說:「來,崇鳳妳來,妳是作者,河流的流向給妳自己抓。」啥米?我麻瓜欸,要我主導?!既無措又緊張,卻深切感受到靜文的慎重,她清楚她的位置,即使是藍染專業,她也要退處幕後。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">「崇鳳,那就是小青(菁)!我們用它的葉子來製作染料。」她指著院子角落一個不起眼的小盆栽說。細小無奇的橢圓綠葉裡,有祖傳的智慧,美濃在清朝時期曾是藍染重鎮,我全然遺失了美濃曾是染庄的記憶,今藍衫老師傅已不用藍染布製衣,我們對便宜的化學染布皺眉,卻又對藍染布的高單價咋舌,而今藍染榮登民間藝術殿堂不是沒有道理的──因為真的好累。若未跟著靜文藍染,很難體會這過程有多麼費神耗力。靜文說,她約莫有十年沒染過這麼大塊的布了。染大布要很小心,稍不留神就可能不均勻,好在有兩個人能相互搭配,布料就這麼反覆在染缸與水缸內來回浸洗,在脫水機中在風中乾燥,一次比一次更深、更有層次。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">真的好像生命,一次又一次,反覆勞動與觀察,要到什麼時候,才能確定那顏色,就是自己要的?</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">中午把布晾好,一起去吃粄條;下午回來,不立即上工,一人一碗日式抹茶,慢慢喝,簡單而深刻的休息,就在閒聊與交換既往的叨叨絮語中完成了。我喜歡,喜歡這婦女勞動間隙的小小儀式,讓人恢復青春活力:「好,上工!」</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">跟著靜文一起做,看她如何帶著愛,反覆漂洗染缸裡的布料,那順水搓揉著布的細緻之力,簡直就像幫嬰兒洗澡!「這是專屬於婦女的勞動美學。」我在心底應聲,依樣畫葫蘆,卻怎麼洗都沒法那麼溫柔順勢,靜文也不要求,她稱職地運用她的專業成為一種陪伴,每當我沒做好或笨手笨腳時(她很早便發現我實在不怎麼俐落^^),她會安撫我、壯大我。那個時候,又像是姊姊,我才知道,原來我需要的,是相互的理解與支持,而非精湛技藝的指教。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">如此染布,整整兩個白日,從太陽上山到落山。靜文沒說,卻難掩腰痠背痛的疲態(我都累了何況是年長的她)。離開前,我跟她說晚幾天把布交給設計師米粒,等衣服做出來,我要捧著這衣衫去拜黃蝶伯公喔~~~靜文一聽,轉頭問:「啊,那要不要準備水果?」「蛤?!」我為她這煞有其事的回應噗哧笑出聲。她喃喃著,如果時間許可,她也想去,水果她備。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none !important; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none !important; white-space-collapse: preserve;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;">無論衣服做得如何,這一切經過都已經值得。有天公伯公照看,祂們知道。謝謝靜文,這篇文章是寫給妳的,為捨命陪君子完全撩落去的豪氣。以植物和水為媒介,作母系智慧的傳承,翻轉傳統價值,顯化為,穿在身上的衣衫。</div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;"> </div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none !important; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none !important;"> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCwa5aAb31KjI-rayQ059K_kg5fkcwLm7O159A3oYkMvCi4TvFes5kHD21BwHa1jCr6dP_K1JVVIHjGNM4E2EUMLQap5MDkez9trHqBXE3Zz_DbO10gO5pmHbSh8B8Hrlc3hMyYIjZ_nV2Lcaha0XDRNAZBdwIvS-qo1sY_bL6_q_A1YrJl9gC9lgFz1E/s2016/002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2016" data-original-width="1134" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCwa5aAb31KjI-rayQ059K_kg5fkcwLm7O159A3oYkMvCi4TvFes5kHD21BwHa1jCr6dP_K1JVVIHjGNM4E2EUMLQap5MDkez9trHqBXE3Zz_DbO10gO5pmHbSh8B8Hrlc3hMyYIjZ_nV2Lcaha0XDRNAZBdwIvS-qo1sY_bL6_q_A1YrJl9gC9lgFz1E/s320/002.jpg" width="180" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /></div></div>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-56835498171953467692023-06-15T18:06:00.001+08:002023-06-15T18:32:20.210+08:00山裡面,一片空白的生命教育 [台灣山岳]<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEit_aVlY1trHf6NXgzX9tNrBCkT0W4mKNMd8awFhQa3hXFYkvhHAWGd9jmIX4wkw8dDYeSqEOc_p-PC-EvVpOdKvix6LTyjo2fj1CkXWErhoW12RebSOzQ70ayow0E86PmE9ZXmp-c7ES0lGhAfut7DSAwVOFkGZ8AF6e41_XUNca22Mxuy7amxm0OE/s6548/by%E5%90%B3%E5%AD%9F%E7%BF%B0%20(3).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3929" data-original-width="6548" height="204" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEit_aVlY1trHf6NXgzX9tNrBCkT0W4mKNMd8awFhQa3hXFYkvhHAWGd9jmIX4wkw8dDYeSqEOc_p-PC-EvVpOdKvix6LTyjo2fj1CkXWErhoW12RebSOzQ70ayow0E86PmE9ZXmp-c7ES0lGhAfut7DSAwVOFkGZ8AF6e41_XUNca22Mxuy7amxm0OE/w340-h204/by%E5%90%B3%E5%AD%9F%E7%BF%B0%20(3).jpg" width="340" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">攝影|吳孟翰</div><br /><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">[</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">序</span><span lang="EN-US">]<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我敲著字,緊盯電腦左側柴燒花器中盛開的粉玫瑰,我得不時看著玫瑰花,才有力量繼續書寫,每一個鍵,都落下擲地有聲的重量。下樓沖一杯咖啡,端上來放在電腦右側,邊寫邊喝,苦澀與微酸,陪伴我承認了生命中種種無知與脆弱──羊的生命、羌的生命、鹿的生命、與我的生命。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">一、見獵心喜<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">初次遇見,該是大學時期在奇萊草坡上驚見水鹿奔馳,箭竹草坡上竄出好大一隻,棕色的皮毛、壯碩的身形、充滿力量的四足,噔噔噔噔橫越過眼前……彼時無人引導,和所有首次見到野生動物的孩子一樣興奮又莽撞,有人高喊,一位學弟拔腿急追,一幫人在後頭大笑,想當然爾他根本就追不上啊,健壯的水鹿迅速沒入山的另一端。但那想認識一個陌生生命的狂喜與好奇,始終讓我念念不忘。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">多年以後,才了解親近野生動物的方式是不動聲色、不驚嚇、不打擾,沉默觀察,若能將自己的存在收攝到最小,才可能靠近,才可能理解。只因每一個生命,都需要被尊重。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: #0070c0;"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">二、死亡的意義<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">那幾年開始隨獵人入山,走入全然不同於資本主義社會的思考與脈絡,屬於部落式的、原始而古老的生死學,開始滲入我的生命。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">他們在佈滿岩石的山丘上圍捕了一頭羊,為一個生命的逝去,他將其背在肩上,一邊走一邊嘹亮地歌唱,後方數人沉默尾隨,成為一列莊嚴的隊伍。基地的人都聽見了並等待迎接,每個人都知曉了有頭活生生的山羊此刻已死,每個人都有機會參與學習處理生命的工作。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">羊的身體倒在地上,我也趴在地上,用鼻子摩蹭牠的鼻子,鼻子還是溫熱的,鮮血染上我的鼻子,這回牠再也不會跑了,不用再追,牠已將生命奉獻。手指探向牠頸部的切口,輕觸被切斷的大管,感覺柔韌有彈性,喔,大動脈是這種觸感啊……必須面對,學習理解,這近身咫尺的死亡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那幾年我的中醫師見我身體虛寒,囑咐我多吃「溫體羊」,然而當我在野外真的有機會吃到溫體羊時,卻無法再如在羊肉爐火鍋店裡那般盡情盡興,我需要時間消化生命成長要付出的代價、需要時間接受死亡的疼痛與震撼。當你的手探進羊的體內掏拾、當你為一隻逝去的大型生命剝皮、當你蹲在溪邊清洗牠的腸道與胃袋、當你見羊腸與肉排掛在火堆上的竹架烘烤煙燻一片腥紅……你會深刻體會,一頭在山崖上奔跑躍動的羊,那生命力多麼值得呵護與歌頌。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">往後幾年,兩次、三次、四次……每一次面對死亡,面對捧在手上的肉塊,我的頭愈來愈低,感恩令人的驕傲與無知片片剝落,只是我在火鍋店裡遍尋不著相似的感恩之情,切斷了生命知覺,我們錯過了什麼?社會剪輯掉什麼?人類對生命的感知原來片段且虛妄。只覺文明與自然之間的距離,遙遠無比。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三、生命</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">‧</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">黑狗與山羊</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">前年春天,與社團學弟妹搭車到花蓮迴頭彎,走大濁水南溯登南湖。過了清溪吊橋,橫渡一段崩壁下到陶賽溪谷,溪床寬廣,一行</span><span lang="EN-US">8</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">人或前或後走著,遇見一位背竹簍的大哥跟黑狗,天氣正是炎熱的中午,在毀棄的仁愛吊橋旁,一處平坦有樹蔭的地方休息,才剛卸下大背包,忽然聽見後方不遠處有學弟大喊,發生了什麼事?我和同學對望一眼,聞聲跑去,才見到溪水中,那一隻黑狗正和一頭長鬃山羊在對峙……兩人停步,才發現溪岸這側已站了不少隊友觀戰。黑狗凶猛,利用山羊不諳水性,一再發動攻擊,牠不像獵犬,似乎也不是首次在溪流中打鬥。那位背竹簍的大哥站在對岸,專注凝視即將到來的搏鬥。機會千載難逢,眾人眼中發散著好奇與興奮,我嗅到了相似的氣味。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">山羊後來受了傷,牠跌跌撞撞,好不容易站穩又被黑狗撲上一咬,黑狗野性完全被激發,狠狠咬住山羊的頸部不放,牠們站在激流處,被水流沖刷的山羊好不狼狽,水花在陽光下濺起無數的閃光,我站在那裡看著,在山羊的奮力掙扎中,深刻見證一個生命在邊緣處求生的深刻渴望。山羊甩掉了黑狗,一跛一跛自水流中往岸上走,那位背竹簍的大哥快速走到靠近山羊處,俐落地撿起邊側一塊大石頭,冷不防往山羊的腦袋一砸──山羊再度落水,黑狗又撲上去。下一刻同學從我身旁起身,說她先回去了,我看著她的背影怔忡了一下,明白她為什麼不想看下去。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">某種程度而言,要冷眼旁觀著現實往冷酷殘暴的方向而去,要不乾脆關閉感知、要不就是轉身拒絕,二者都需要莫大的勇氣。因為那顆石頭幾乎跟山羊的腦袋一樣大,被砸下那一瞬太令人震驚,與其說山羊倒下過於戲劇性,不如說突如其來的助攻殘忍卑劣得讓我們措手不及。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我說不出話,望向那位大哥,看來,他不是獵人。山羊勉強爬起來了!還沒回神就被黑狗再度咬住,雙重夾攻之下山羊的掙扎開始顯得無力,大哥看他的猛犬發威,我看著山羊的眼神,那麼無助那麼落魄。當山羊節節敗退被逼到岸邊,那位大哥手上的大石頭再往山羊身上用力擊落,一次、兩次、三次……我好想扭頭離去,卻知曉離開不會改變現實。那大哥平靜的眼突現殺意,我看到了,他要羊死,羊不能不死。一人一犬共同攻擊,山羊的動作遲緩,踉踉蹌蹌,直到那位大哥抓住牠的頭,壓進水面下──我傻了,沒見過有人這麼捕捉動物。水面下的羊驚恐無比,使盡所有吃奶的力氣要浮上來,又被狠狠壓下去……牠的力氣不敵大哥,那幾秒鐘,我們就這麼眼睜睜地看著羊的氣息在水中斷絕,掙扎的四肢慢慢放鬆,順水漂流。羊死了,人的目的達到了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">艷陽高照,大哥獨自將水裡的羊拖上岸,擱置在礫石灘上,背起竹簍,與黑狗前行,漸行漸遠。自始至終,我們沒搭上任何一句話。我找不到勇氣去追問,喊不出那一句:「你怎麼可以這樣對待生命?」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這與過去所經驗的大不相同,多數獵人珍重所殺的生命,拿取和保存均有倫理與智慧。我不明白剛死的山羊何以沒被安置在流水深處保持低溫,曝屍在陽光底下所為何來?我所理解和經驗的動物之死都太慎重太過尊敬,從未如此近距離看見,一個生命不僅毫無尊嚴地逝去,而肉身亦未被珍惜。大哥會回來取山羊吧?他會背回去對吧?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">深刻的打擊,源自於我的眼對上山羊的最後一眼。這不只是生存競爭的失敗,更多是對絕望。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">人類為何而殺?我站在那裡,愕然無語。大家悻悻然縮著肩膀走回休息處,回程的失語沉重和來時的興奮好奇大不相同。樹蔭下等待中的同學看向我,「羊死了。」我只能這麼說,那早已料到的事實。然而我佩服她,拒絕見證這場殺戮也許是好事。羊的故事複雜難解,牠還躺在那裡,眼中所見之處。但我無能為力,只得負重前行,繼續消化。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">大自然裡,人,到底是一種什麼樣的存在呢?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">之於生死與獵殺,學弟妹無太多相關經驗,沒有人討論,河床寬廣得像沙漠,了無生氣。憋屈與憤怒壓在心底,我竟感窘迫孤寂。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一個生命已然逝去,然而人們似乎沒辦法在意,或說必須不去在意。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">‧天主堂的十字架</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那一天像命中註定,如某種咒語,在那隻羊溺斃之後持續出現,約莫半天的時間內,無論走在溪床的左岸右岸,我們總是會遇見。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">起初不以為意,像一般登山縱走在路邊突然發現動物骨頭那樣尋常,但頻率太密集,我感到奇怪,大家也沒說破,只是默默前行,學弟會用笑聲讓氣氛輕鬆。就這麼,遇見路邊完整的骨骸、遇見只剩下頭骨的、遇見剛死去不久還有蛆爬著的、遇見溪裡被流水不停沖刷的……今天是怎麼了?怎麼會有這麼多的羊和羌?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而我更想問的是,這一連串安排是什麼意思?這麼多逝去的生命要告訴我們什麼?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">據說陶賽吊橋後往梅園的產業道路,有個廢棄的天主堂,開始期盼找到天主堂,我需要。但盼安寧與希望來平衡我們所遭遇的。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">學弟自叉路切入,芒草中穿行,就快抵達上梅園,愈近工寮,路兩旁的垃圾便愈多,這裡尚有人跡,據說還住著村民,然而,風送來一陣一陣生命腐朽的氣味卻騙不了人,那是生命未被善待的味道,我皺了眉,努力忍耐,直至走經兩間水泥工寮的廊道……這是上梅園?環境雜亂,烤架上有一隻未烤完的水鹿,一整隻,氣味濃重,風捎來的氣息便是這頭水鹿了,而我難以收受,現場環境的一切明確傳達著有人於此居住生活,但燻到發黑的鐵皮屋頂、腐敗的食物、以及半個山坡的垃圾……一股混亂的憂懼籠罩,這是一個非常不快樂的地方,天主堂在哪裡?我是來爬山溯溪的,叩問的是原始的淨土,卻來到地獄之前,那生命腐敗的氣味強烈逼人,不被珍惜的是水鹿,還是人自己本身?烤架上作廢的水鹿是個代表,和先前那隻遭溺斃的長鬃山羊一樣,人的存在,掌握了自然之命。無論大(環境生態)小(動植物),自然現場的樣貌反映著人類的內在狀態。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">現實太不舒服了,我幾乎是用逃的步伐離開水泥工寮的。繼續繞行,一邊走,一邊在心底細數……共</span><span lang="EN-US">8</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">隻,這天我們一共連續遇見</span><span lang="EN-US">8</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">隻死亡的動物。牠們各有各的死法,取之不盡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">直到抬頭,看見一個天主保祐碑,偉岸的二葉松下,碑體樹影斑駁。碑上有個十字架,如結界一般矗立,我愣了愣,深呼吸一口氣。之後,一路的氣味與風景都恍若異境。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">如果不是找到天祥天主堂,我不會相信這一路有什麼好盼望的。天主堂已廢棄,過去是梅園重要的信仰中心,有神父常駐於此,還會招待登山客住宿。我沿著天主堂的建築靜靜繞走,長椅完好可供休憩,四周的樹林靜謐得連落果都能聽見。好奇怪,方才的躁動都被洗淨,與學弟妹開心地在教堂前合照,這裡沒有時間,教堂好像才剛關門一樣。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">同樣是人開創的地方,怎麼會有截然不同的氣場?我不是教徒,卻在這裡得到安歇。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">‧骨頭與角<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">因這條溪谷生命眾多,兩位跑在前面的學弟身強體健、年輕氣盛,他們在上溯的過程中一路留心,看誰先發現動物的蹤跡。任何頭角或骨頭都會令他們駐足,直到我看到他們兩人圍著一副骨骸,趨身上前。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">這隻小鹿已經離世很久很久了,骨頭很完整。就是學弟太喜愛動物,兩人討論著如何將黏著頭骨的角取下。其中一個率先抓握住脊椎,稍加一扭,頸椎就斷了──我忍不住了,「等一下!」<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">只是想起一件往事。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">那是非常年輕時的隊伍。清早,我們在某營地拔營後正要出發,有個人凝視著那顆帶點青苔色的鹿頭,鹿頭完整,而且巨大,兩支鹿角昂然挺立,非常、非常美。「這一定是鹿王!」我第一次看到那鹿頭就這麼認定。鹿頭連同鹿角,重量非同小可。離開營地前,我轉身,看到那人嘗試把鹿頭擊碎的畫面,因為骨頭堅硬的緣故,他的破壞力相當有限。鹿頭逐漸在他愈發猛烈的敲擊中崩解,只是我無法再看,一股緊窒自胸口升起,難以呼吸。我沒法跟他說,我覺得鹿靈還在,可不可以溫柔一點對待?我想說,但我不知該怎麼開口,鹿靈這種事,毫無根據。我不知所措,轉身離去,漸行漸遠的同時仍聽見用力重擊以及頭骨的碎裂聲。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">角,就是如此迷人。那是幸運的象徵、力量的代表、榮耀的見證,不管是誰,都可能見獵心喜。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">所以現在,我得為我的不舒服發言了。「你們過來這邊一下好嗎?」因為在乎,所以鼓起勇氣敘說。學弟感受到我的慎重,兩人離開小鹿骨骸處,我們走到溪流另一側,一起蹲在溪邊:「即使已經死亡的,都值得尊重,太用力會迷失自己……」其實我忘了自己到底說了些什麼,只知沒說幾句,兩個學弟已經站起身,說繼續前進吧!我重新擺好斷掉的頸椎,看兩個聰明可愛的學弟一下就飛得老遠……<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">身體微抖,兩手仍在微微滲汗──我介入了,我有傳達到我想傳達的嗎?如果時間能倒流,我真想在那一刻對著對岸背竹簍的大哥喊:「請不要這樣對待生命!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">是的,只是沒有人提醒、分享、議論、引導而已。人類對生命的覺知不會如此淺薄,文明高度發展的我們,除了辨識與拿取,其實需要更多與自然相依的生命教育啊。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">‧</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">生生不息</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">隔日,沿溪繼續上溯,學弟在那裡收到他父親的三十通未接來電,我們才得知前一天早上花蓮發生了台鐵史上最嚴重的太魯閣翻車事件──只因溯溪點正是花蓮,翻車意外發生日和我們的出發日雷同,家人急切地想確認隊伍是否已經出發而非正在交通日。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「我爸說,死了很多人(死亡</span><span lang="EN-US">49</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">人</span><span lang="EN-US">213</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">人輕重傷)……」學弟苦笑。坐在藍鯨巨石之上,風吹來涼涼的,一幫人都靜默了。稍早精彩的溪谷中,連續攀岩的快意已隨風而去。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我偏頭,無可避免地想起了昨日的種種死亡,與太魯閣翻車日是同一天。那</span><span lang="EN-US">8</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">隻羊、羌、以及鹿,一連串的相遇,是否是一種徵兆、一種警示?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一位學弟爬上「浪頭藍鯨」巨石的最前端,效仿《獅子王》卡通中那個經典畫面:他單膝跪地,雙手高舉,陽光下,兩手煞有其事地捧起一個紅色岩盔──彷彿甫出生的小獅子王<u>辛巴</u>。另一位學弟順勢唱起了片頭曲「生生不息</span><span lang="EN-US">Circle Of Life</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">」的開場,誇張戲劇性的聲調讓所有人都大笑。那些關於死亡的闇黑沉重,就這麼剛剛好地,被學弟旺盛的生命力和幽默感,輕巧地平衡了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">四、此生為人<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體;">我很榮幸今生為人,誕生在這個地球上,用我的身體與五感去走闖、去品味,這多采多姿的世界。千奇百怪萬紫千紅的物種環繞在我們周遭,揮灑各自的生命彼此競爭彼此服務,我們的生命教育卻是一片空白,貪戀生、卻恐懼死,人類所知是那麼微渺那麼有限,稍不留神就被貪婪和自以為是蒙蔽。而今我在狂野生命的消長中學習:長鬃山羊教我倫理與尊嚴、台灣水鹿教我珍愛生命、天祥天主堂告訴我相信的力量、學弟向我示範何謂接受與成長……那麼縱使黑暗勢力仍有混亂狂暴的示現,我也能在這一再攀登上溯的過程中,找到專屬於人的聲音和力量了。<span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYqVUfDJodwUNA8tPiAH8A_KAINphYh0nVdx7Bmyf3H4RH4w2-D_HQ8rNdkE6C3VQroE6yCh98Dy_Hf5XH5PO57uSHWuDPF8I68EQiqJ__38fGDO7mnms1_yP4aPIW8aWoxCyQd89DdIhO0moGtUZEaawdT2UxOFJAM5RovLQ9iY7lN8oFKL-QiS2s/s1613/by%E5%90%B3%E5%AD%9F%E7%BF%B0%20(11).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1210" data-original-width="1613" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYqVUfDJodwUNA8tPiAH8A_KAINphYh0nVdx7Bmyf3H4RH4w2-D_HQ8rNdkE6C3VQroE6yCh98Dy_Hf5XH5PO57uSHWuDPF8I68EQiqJ__38fGDO7mnms1_yP4aPIW8aWoxCyQd89DdIhO0moGtUZEaawdT2UxOFJAM5RovLQ9iY7lN8oFKL-QiS2s/s320/by%E5%90%B3%E5%AD%9F%E7%BF%B0%20(11).JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br /><o:p><br /></o:p><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><br /><o:p><br /></o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-62403086186926208412023-06-12T17:58:00.000+08:002023-06-15T18:32:37.804+08:00遊園驚夢 [文訊]<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX7p1ZvIHHDlAdu5QGXy5OsnBGN7E3V80SbTb2XGZQ1NH7CZhJkMoUCaMwZwkmQDscWyt3ZagD19br4d4kmovkYJO-ntZOr21lNbhuJ8Rgqt6rdAjlceEPpckXj2GHW8zwcbzJQUgEZnILImJewdTXaRqg1kSHY6kqYqe0QX0vvXfc2s1jhVLRvt_1/s1988/love.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1988" data-original-width="1988" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX7p1ZvIHHDlAdu5QGXy5OsnBGN7E3V80SbTb2XGZQ1NH7CZhJkMoUCaMwZwkmQDscWyt3ZagD19br4d4kmovkYJO-ntZOr21lNbhuJ8Rgqt6rdAjlceEPpckXj2GHW8zwcbzJQUgEZnILImJewdTXaRqg1kSHY6kqYqe0QX0vvXfc2s1jhVLRvt_1/s320/love.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">家附近有個莊園,那邊的圍牆並非銅牆鐵壁的水泥,而是大葉黃楊圍成的綠籬,我常站在外頭仰望著高高的大葉黃楊,幻想莊園內部的空曠幽靜。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一、</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一個微冷的冬末,再度站在高高的大葉黃楊外,一個人牽著狗不住往裡探看,有綠地、林木、房屋……好像還有水池?園子裡靜悄悄的,我杵在那裡猶疑,黑狗笨尼尼呆看著我。終於,一人一狗自綠籬的間隙彎腰鑽入,一個跨步,就越了界。我小心翼翼,笨尼尼連嗅聞也變得輕悄,時間像蜂蜜滴入開水中,那樣甜美恍惚。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">……沒有人?放了笨尼尼的牽繩,沒多久牠就在林子裡跑了起來,我著迷於笨尼尼瘋跑的快意,感覺身心舒暢無比。此後,我們常來此,空曠的園子了無人跡,我坐在樹下仰望天空,想起童年偷跑出去不睡覺的午後,那閒逸已遠離生命好久好久。笨尼尼喜歡這裡,時常狂熱地在泥地上瘋掘,掘出一個大地洞,再把頭塞進去拼命鑽,出來時,灰頭土臉的滑稽樣會逗得我哈哈大笑。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">喜歡踩落葉沙沙作響的聲音、喜歡清早葉隙間灑下來的晨光、喜歡看鳥兒起飛時枝頭震顫、喜歡笨尼尼瘋跑時弓起繃緊的身體……喜歡,彎腰鑽入這無可奉告的秘密基地,發春秋大夢。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">不知不覺,來時攜帶的東西愈來愈多,書、狗零嘴、熱豆漿、童軍椅……每回穿越大葉黃楊,我會在界線上對這空間深深一鞠躬,完成「入園儀式」。久了,我能觀察園子裡花草樹木的變化、光線與溼氣的不同,連日雨後野草猖狂,什麼時候被工人除了草、燒了剪枝的樹幹,我和笨尼尼都知道。幾棵喜歡的樹,我靠著它們看書,不自覺看得投入,那是非常安寧的時光。笨尼尼跑來,吃了肉乾又跑去玩,直到我起身喚牠,宣布回家。離開前,牠會在空地上瘋轉個五六圈,那是牠的離園儀式,才隨我再度鑽出那高高的綠籬,一人一狗散步回家。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">二、</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我與笨尼尼就在莊園這麼過了一個春天,時值新冠病毒疫情爆發,坐在園子裡的樹下,數著枝頭上的鳥兒,感覺曾經敲敲打打的瘋狂世界,此刻均沉寂休養,竟莫名尋得內裡的寧靜,與這空間連結愈發深刻的同時,我也愈來愈心虛──莊園的主人到底在哪兒呢?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">想光明正大地愛著這裡,開始打聽莊園主人的聯繫方式,取得電話號碼後,鼓起勇氣打電話:「阿伯你好,時常經過你的莊園,好喜歡那裡的樹林喔,其實我每天清晨都去那邊遛狗……」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我在自首,心怦怦怦怦地跳個不停。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那頭似乎對這通沒頭沒腦的電話有些錯愕,隨即傳來悶笑,是熟悉的客語:「細妹,妳哪位人?」喔,太好了,忙不迭用客語自我介紹,連阿公都搬出來了。「……好啦,那裡本來做民宿用,疫情爆發之後現在都休息了。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">電話掛斷,我鬆了好大一口氣,歡天喜地只差沒拉笨尼尼跳舞,以後可以光明磊落地進出了!立馬邀先生隔日同行。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">自那之後,先生跟著來了,微風吹拂的清晨,不遠處大道上佈滿了細碎的黃色斑點,走近一看,在下雨嗎?仰頭,清靈的黃色小花如雪一般翩然落下,落到頭上、肩上,站久一點,滿身都是。我打開雙手,黃花風鈴木在這一刻,是這麼美這麼有力量啊……大道邊側,這麼為先生按摩起肩頸──務農的他平日在田裡苦幹實幹慣了,若不是這園子,他怎知我們也能是天地如詩的一部份?笨尼尼最是開心,男主人同遊讓牠異常興奮。日後只要笨尼尼在園子裡突然衝到綠籬外,怎麼叫也不回來,我就知道先生來了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這裡是我的廟宇、我的殿堂,我在這裡安坐,靈魂得以安歇。葉子落下、林鳥振翅,當笨尼尼興奮地叼著死去的鳥兒前來,我滿園追著牠跑,搶下牠口中的屍體,帶到林間角落埋入──死亡,也是這裡的一部分。當病毒不退、烏克蘭戰爭持續、台海兩岸益發緊張,亂世之中,隱遁也許是人至深的想望。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 甫抬頭,看到園子另一側來了兩隻狗,一隻脖子上有綠色項圈……「黑熊!」我不無錯愕,笨尼尼的好兄弟黑熊,竟尋著牠的氣味找到這裡來?還帶上一隻年輕的黃狗。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">笨尼尼又驚又喜,三隻狗從這邊跑到小圓丘、又從小圓丘跳進水池,在水裡瞎鬧一陣後又追上來,抖完身子再衝下水池……我顧不得看書,完全被生命旺盛的活力所吸引,忍不住跟在牠們身後,邊跑邊走邊拍手,那是過去埋首工作的我,不曾享受過的快樂。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那天笨尼尼回家,累趴整整一天,我笑死了。「累得像條狗一樣」,如此完美被詮釋。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「好期待明天去遛狗喔!」睡前我會這樣喃喃。怎麼說呢?遛狗不再是責任或義務,而成為充電小旅行。傳統客庄事事講究實用,狗不是拴著鍊條就是待在鐵籠中,只為看家;植栽則為買賣、或為食用、或作柴薪,莊園卻無聲告訴我,看待天地萬物各種「無為」的可能。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">明明離家單車十分鐘的距離,卻不像在美濃,倒像在異鄉。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三、</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「那園子要賣了,你知道嗎?」某天先生隨口提及。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「什麼?」我雙目圓睜。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒多久,樹林裡的空地開始種起香蕉苗,井然有序、煞有其事地保持固定間距栽種,樹林、草地、水池、沙地都還在,但就是整片當田一樣種起了香蕉苗。我覺得突兀又矛盾,先生又說:「農地就是要有農地的樣子,買賣才算數。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我還是牽著笨尼尼去玩,穿越綠籬站在邊界上深深一鞠躬,看著滿園的綠色香蕉苗一株株排排好站直,卻無人灌溉施肥,在盛夏之中緩緩垂頭、枯死至焦黃。我一樣坐在樹下,卻愈坐愈惆悵,面對這裡即將的改變,懷抱一股不祥的預感。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我該醒了。夏天過後,這片園子,會如夢一般消散。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">新的土堆出現,標示新界線,電纜線拉起,貨櫃屋與露營車也運進去了……那天,穿越高高的大葉黃楊,發現部分邊界已築起銀白色的鐵欄杆……走進園子,地上堆了壯碩的枝幹,不是疏伐剪枝會有的,幾棵樹斷頭,一部大卡車停在大道上,一位叼著菸的伯父站在那裡與卡車司機說話。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">是買主嗎?我走過去,有禮貌地自我介紹,指著笨尼尼詢問能否讓牠在這邊跑跑?伯父咧開嘴笑了,牙齒的接縫有黑紅檳榔渣的痕跡。「你的狗會咬人嗎?」他瞇眼審視著笨尼尼。我搖搖頭。「那好,施工期間大門會開著,這段時間你都可以帶狗來。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「伯父,這裡的樹真的很漂亮,可以保留下來嗎?」我說。伯父告訴我:「樹太高會引雷,在這裡度假,夏日午後雷陣雨會很危險。」並指著那些堆在地上被鋸斷的樹幹:「妳要嗎?要不要載回去當柴燒……」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">夢已醒,我發現。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">笨尼尼不知為何跑沒多久就停了,牠安靜跟在身邊,隨我走逛熟悉的園子。我看著每一棵樹,這些樹曾惠予我無數的靜謐、靈光以及安全感……離開時,我感覺淒愴,後花園消失了,回家吃早餐毫無興致,笨尼尼也沒精打采。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「施工期你還是可以帶狗去……」先生安慰我。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">似乎也再找不到去的理由了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">四、</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">終於我回到原點:牽著黑狗,站在高高的綠籬外看著莊園。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">新穎的欄杆在陽光下閃著銀光,有一天這些大葉黃楊會不會倒下?露營車又多了幾部,裡頭的聲音變多變大了。解封的後疫情時代,假日這裡總有很多人聚集,夜裡昏黃的燈光像不會落山的月亮,新的故事進駐,酒酣耳熱之際,人們高聲談笑。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我回到家後方土地公廟的化胎上,與笨尼尼坐看我庄。不時飄散在空氣中難言的農藥與化肥味,提醒我真實的存有──真實是遊園驚夢一場,真實是無常便是常。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><u>刊載於2023/04文訊雜誌</u></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-59645247463600407022023-05-30T22:26:00.004+08:002023-05-30T22:26:46.215+08:00狼狽收割:辛苦都會過去,小農值得尊敬<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrlJZYH7u0ZIuRqxSRkhI7C0bOwA2nXMfliPLVpahsaWlym_8fb0vxU6vm9QTKFvPL55hy0QbkXSKIOtmWGinoM68UCje8LiIq5rBgEcdivGko6mP0nl961bSob3pmMipLiYJ5GpPvxa56dPcUCcCBf6FKbQ7zPUepv20VgJjIdwNeOpdg6IBrIEjm/s3832/346168857_250386944203308_3502539241680578620_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3358" data-original-width="3832" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrlJZYH7u0ZIuRqxSRkhI7C0bOwA2nXMfliPLVpahsaWlym_8fb0vxU6vm9QTKFvPL55hy0QbkXSKIOtmWGinoM68UCje8LiIq5rBgEcdivGko6mP0nl961bSob3pmMipLiYJ5GpPvxa56dPcUCcCBf6FKbQ7zPUepv20VgJjIdwNeOpdg6IBrIEjm/s320/346168857_250386944203308_3502539241680578620_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">Photo/ Jez & Kayo</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有史以來,收割最狼狽的一次。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">南部久旱無雨,搶水困難,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">早先美濃農民氣氛已經不是太好。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">撐到收割,又怕有雨,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">氣象預報還真會下雨,人心倉皇ㄘㄨㄚ</span><span lang="EN-US">\</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">咧等。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">每個農夫都努力</span><span lang="EN-US">CALL</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">代耕業者,想趕收割,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">唯恐自己排不到,唯恐自己被漏掉。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老天千萬別下雨哪,一下雨收割機就不能工作了哪。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這天是我們約好的收割日,小飽從早上就開始等。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">正逢錄音師</span><span lang="EN-US">Jez</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">和藝評家</span><span lang="EN-US">Kayo</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">要去收割現場收音,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">只是我難以告知他們確切時間。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">務農,從以前到現在,總要看老天臉色,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">從不是農人說了算。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就連收割,也掌握在代耕業者的排序中。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">說好的</span><span lang="EN-US">10</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">點到</span><span lang="EN-US">12</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">點之間,過了</span><span lang="EN-US">12</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">點還不見收割業者</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老闆</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">來電。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">友善農耕這些年,還是沒能練就一身老神在在,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">中午</span><span lang="EN-US">12</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">點半,小飽等不及,自己一個人跑去田邊等。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">下午</span><span lang="EN-US">1</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">點,我去訊飽,說我買中飯過去一起等好嗎?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">他告訴我他已買好</span><span lang="EN-US">7-11</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">的麵包</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">顯然無心吃飯</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">直到我趕到田邊,發現老闆不在,小飽也消失了……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">原來是老闆太忙,他請小飽自行到其他地方</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">去接應那開收割機的阿伯,帶路來到我們田裡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">再請小飽自行去他家開貨車來載穀。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">看小飽這麼到處跑來跑去,我好生困惑。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「老闆呢?」我問小飽,飽回:「他等一下會來。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">開收割機的阿伯自行下田開始收割囉</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老闆不來,沒人幫忙拉太空包,肉腳如我只好登場,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我爬上貨車,一邊爬一邊不死心問:「老闆呢?」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小飽說:「等一下就來。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">呃,這全美濃都在收割,老闆忙不過來是嗎……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那收割機已滿肚子都是穀子,伸長管子在上空等待,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">殊不知我還沒順利爬上貨車,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">開收割機的大哥不知怎麼以為我們已準備好,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那粗壯的管子,就這麼狂洩下瀑布般的穀子……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">嘩啦啦啦黃澄澄的穀子啊……都沒裝入太空包……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「等一下!等一下!!等、一、下──!!!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">只見小飽跟我瘋了似地大吼,一次比一次更大聲,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">洩下的聲音夾以機器轟隆隆作響,沒人聽到我倆狂吼,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">穀子噴得一貨車都是……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">連路邊兩位幫忙的阿姨都跟著大喊,收割機阿伯還是沒聽到,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那瞬間我真感到絕望……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">等到阿伯終於意識到還不能放穀子下來,按下暫停鍵時,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我看著一車散落一地小山也似的穀子,感到沮喪。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">至少終於停下來了……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「沒關係,等一下掃起來就好!」小飽平穩地說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小飽就這麼搭配肉腳如我,高舉雙手拉好太空包,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">裝滿第一袋</span><span lang="EN-US">1000</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">公斤的穀子。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「老闆咧?!」風中我繼續追問,真希望可以有專業的來工作。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「等一下就來了。」小飽回給我那一千零一句。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSTlC2MyDx5LW2FlUnTk9bD3WACJem0ePvHgYxS8q4peS2EPkTfL_wL784sgwLv6ccc6ipviX7prcSuDMnXPSdB8a-MH1by-8umqpROm77RWBaFKkjQK8JMFOrH4ljQOZwSo7eD0s-VGt-HN8GlZhQdVSP3pnHyR6cRRZlON56AGgS5oU2VpFQIsPF/s3832/348379572_942231080356050_7370016891982733990_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3358" data-original-width="3832" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSTlC2MyDx5LW2FlUnTk9bD3WACJem0ePvHgYxS8q4peS2EPkTfL_wL784sgwLv6ccc6ipviX7prcSuDMnXPSdB8a-MH1by-8umqpROm77RWBaFKkjQK8JMFOrH4ljQOZwSo7eD0s-VGt-HN8GlZhQdVSP3pnHyR6cRRZlON56AGgS5oU2VpFQIsPF/s320/348379572_942231080356050_7370016891982733990_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">收割機繼續割,待機器的肚子再度裝滿第二回合,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">等不到老闆,我認命爬上貨車,收音的</span><span lang="EN-US">Jez</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">站在一旁,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">難得有人有心想錄農村收割現場的聲音,再度高舉雙手拉好太空包,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「注意太空包下面要拉開,不然裝不好。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小飽一交代完,長管子已洩下瀑布般的穀子,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我擔心太空包底部沒拉開,放下一隻手去理下空處的結果,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就是太空包一角因重力不平均而掉下去──</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那瀑布般黃澄澄蘊含了一季辛苦的稻穀啊,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">再度失控,遍撒太空包外……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「等一下!等一下!!我說等一下!!!」小飽大喊,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">Jez</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">似乎也跟著喊叫。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">農家的辛勞,就是事事都靠身體勞動,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">稍有不慎,全都人力承擔、人工收拾。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「齁!妳為什麼……」肉腳如我因此被農夫小飽責難了一眼。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我明白農夫的不捨,也自責自己不小心。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">但是……老闆咧?!?!?!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我站的位置,是老闆的位置啊</span><span lang="EN-US">~~~<o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒辦法,得立刻接受,立刻重整自己才行!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「不用管了,先拉起來,灑出去的等一下一起弄!」小飽說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">好,好好,我重新舉高雙手,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒有應該,只有當下。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">初到美濃的錄音師</span><span lang="EN-US">Jez</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">也一手舉著錄音器材,一手忍不住偷偷幫忙拉太空包。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">裝好第二袋</span><span lang="EN-US">1000</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">公斤的穀子,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我忙不迭爬下貨車,拉起另一個袋子,準備盛裝那些露出來的失控。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「這下要用甚麼掃</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">穀子</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">?」我問。沒有畚箕、沒有掃刷的任何工具。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小飽直接整個人趴在貨車載貨板上,用雙手當掃把,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">撥撈那一堆堆穀子下車,他徒手瘋掃的那股勁,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">幫忙割稻的阿姨也看不下去,一起用手來撥掃,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我很弱,我沒戴手套,敏感體質的我,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">不敢碰有纖毛的新鮮穀子,擔心屆時太癢會過敏。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">只能拉好袋子開口,等穀子被掃下來,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那想出手又不敢出手的孬,讓自己印象深刻。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「粒粒皆辛苦」原來是這個道理。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDUdDTcl4yRaA9WBZ_LM2NXWI1ymIgBiHdYoLW9RTjPJSc0LFnAcZnHwPLYH2f6FvuwH5MuToZN45n8hUg6cLQyULuz_emVtjSxoRwO61WdY8KhS4mg_OWWRGXklvj8MBph6hyv9lNspow3i5c9GB4uJGfRvSA8hOS77VK8D2s2AIz-UbQgdGMxiGK/s3832/348383196_1866552203730190_1987782587526846285_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3358" data-original-width="3832" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDUdDTcl4yRaA9WBZ_LM2NXWI1ymIgBiHdYoLW9RTjPJSc0LFnAcZnHwPLYH2f6FvuwH5MuToZN45n8hUg6cLQyULuz_emVtjSxoRwO61WdY8KhS4mg_OWWRGXklvj8MBph6hyv9lNspow3i5c9GB4uJGfRvSA8hOS77VK8D2s2AIz-UbQgdGMxiGK/s320/348383196_1866552203730190_1987782587526846285_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0Ya56Zhyo1Bg4vZb_aufxGRdSYC8a0FJ8Z8Ae6yHJpr-NXXA4ZkLZj7Tx80G20PqB7Tws848GQFe-m_euZ9gGEK6WvC5RUiIa3rTSZ6zeiDz2ACAzb-4ORsoNMRS4h0eiQBms1vFZe3oMylh24dIcpdBfR5tRzg6_g1EfScqL707Mul3DavUyXPDF/s3072/346161713_742081601001242_5906598561031943932_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="3072" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0Ya56Zhyo1Bg4vZb_aufxGRdSYC8a0FJ8Z8Ae6yHJpr-NXXA4ZkLZj7Tx80G20PqB7Tws848GQFe-m_euZ9gGEK6WvC5RUiIa3rTSZ6zeiDz2ACAzb-4ORsoNMRS4h0eiQBms1vFZe3oMylh24dIcpdBfR5tRzg6_g1EfScqL707Mul3DavUyXPDF/s320/346161713_742081601001242_5906598561031943932_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhE3FyZPBhfb5PgWzZd2gIHCK9z2j-NAjwTxO4BD07LQzfAzakgFXXgN8oKV09ZH89n7hJvbovhh9xo8EJW2GbPAwJmEnAELt9QtMuGPGTpdBE-HSKbfXJOfZDa5c7YYuU65KzrMR6hVPS5-JzW8JvdV3CcKxTeece23M-Lr_Jr4r-YL9zTYKI5WMZ9/s3072/346168778_187613217568095_1612412223970776765_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="3072" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhE3FyZPBhfb5PgWzZd2gIHCK9z2j-NAjwTxO4BD07LQzfAzakgFXXgN8oKV09ZH89n7hJvbovhh9xo8EJW2GbPAwJmEnAELt9QtMuGPGTpdBE-HSKbfXJOfZDa5c7YYuU65KzrMR6hVPS5-JzW8JvdV3CcKxTeece23M-Lr_Jr4r-YL9zTYKI5WMZ9/s320/346168778_187613217568095_1612412223970776765_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><br /></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「老闆咧?!」逕自在心中發問,已不想再問小飽。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">他比誰都希望老闆在,可嘆美濃到處都趕收割,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">誰都害怕稍晚或明天會下雨,要是誰排好了卻沒收到,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">老闆也吃不完兜著走。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我們是這樣,收完了第一片</span><span lang="EN-US">4</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">分地的田。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒有下雨,友人相伴,老闆沒來,自立自強。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">在小飽自行開了裝滿三袋的穀子去烘米廠,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">收割機自田裡開上柏油路之時,老闆終於開車到來……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這最狼狽也最真實的一次收割,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">全都讓做藝術的友人見證了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US">Kayo</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">事後默默來訊:</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「託福讓我們有機會能近距離看到收割,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">難以想像、但粗淺體會到務農的辛苦。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">兩位友人甚麼也不會,</span><span style="font-family: 新細明體, serif;">僅僅在一旁用他們的方式記錄與見證,</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">似乎也成為一種,陪伴。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">務農現場,確實有太多料想不到的狀況,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">無論熟手生手,都只能硬著頭皮接招,</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒有理想,人人都盡力了,這難熬的一季。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvHUM5USRbpXIjaWwtOrfmSqX_AOJzAIcRlZLxQBlojPAA4GikaYGXTT6QQnfBYDfRmnP8WXB16mYzudXsArZWHMbLu22k3F4Q2CM5ncdJrLOdREcLCoDdejNdZZO-YBOX0VHf3XJyJS0t61FQfkSKlzfVYjjzigCxs3PfTtwT_vUXB9vkF38zp6sv/s3832/348370897_3487222918262700_624830359012480144_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3358" data-original-width="3832" height="280" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvHUM5USRbpXIjaWwtOrfmSqX_AOJzAIcRlZLxQBlojPAA4GikaYGXTT6QQnfBYDfRmnP8WXB16mYzudXsArZWHMbLu22k3F4Q2CM5ncdJrLOdREcLCoDdejNdZZO-YBOX0VHf3XJyJS0t61FQfkSKlzfVYjjzigCxs3PfTtwT_vUXB9vkF38zp6sv/s320/348370897_3487222918262700_624830359012480144_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-54503249994222659172023-05-26T21:59:00.015+08:002023-05-30T22:12:18.163+08:00我想要一套讓我驕傲的傳統服飾:客家藍衫(1)<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5V-EtIfr9PkiSvm-ORxlVHD2oF1NPy37g6OcKDIMI85LiGIA_QskRWAcdXWEfl1pyN0t8XCzKdMpD8fIR88D0l8_bO7eyw8IA0UO8AXFqgHKroRwDF9903dRWl0xRt31eRGOBTj9sHNW62f-MmUHss1bw5TH1ba0Cb8w9LpS9Eef9YoLmSx9MoWhz/s1200/4Y9A7555.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5V-EtIfr9PkiSvm-ORxlVHD2oF1NPy37g6OcKDIMI85LiGIA_QskRWAcdXWEfl1pyN0t8XCzKdMpD8fIR88D0l8_bO7eyw8IA0UO8AXFqgHKroRwDF9903dRWl0xRt31eRGOBTj9sHNW62f-MmUHss1bw5TH1ba0Cb8w9LpS9Eef9YoLmSx9MoWhz/s320/4Y9A7555.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">photo/顏歸真</div><br /><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">返鄉美濃七年,不知什麼時候開始,想為自己訂製一套藍衫,卻始終無法為傳統客家藍衫感到驕傲。一是客家藍衫充滿對女性實用與遮羞的期待,二來客家節儉惜物的性格反應在穿衣文化上,我想認同我的傳統服飾,然而怎麼看怎麼了解,都無法喜歡。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">偶爾參加鄰近原住民學校的畢業典禮或祭典活動,為他們各色各樣繽紛美麗的傳統服飾感到讚嘆,心中對應的是客家藍衫的簡單素樸。叛逆反骨的我,沒能在自身民族服飾上感受到美學,而更多是對女性勞動力的對應與規訓。比如彎腰勞動時要確保後腰能完全蔽體而將衣衫做長;比如衣領須連縫七層不是為了硬挺而是為避免壞掉(不怕壞,一層壞了還有一層);沒有腰身和其他繡花並非不愛美,而是平日出外不張揚,夜間終會為丈夫開襟綻放……聽聞這些藍衫背後的設計概念時,只能瞪大雙眼無言。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">所以儘管,身邊少數友人擁有自己的客家藍衫,特殊場合能用上,我看著看著,卻始終未去製衫,並不代表我不想要。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我在乎,因為我知道,慎重其事穿上身的衣服,代表對自我價值的認同。當我對傳統又敬又愛又懼,對傳統價值觀感到困惑時,我能做的,就是觀察。時間久了,發現自己真心渴望看到美麗的舒心的客家藍衫,不全然符合標準也沒關係,只因現代女性已非傳統模板,我們已活出當代多元開放的樣貌,那麼,能否在對傳統的尊重與在乎之下,勇於變化呢?</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">曾在一個祭典中看到屏東蒂摩爾古薪舞集的服裝,將排灣族傳統服飾改造得讓人眼睛一亮,我於是想,客家人生性保守,不代表我們不想翻轉與創新。對傳統服飾的觀察和思考夠了,時候到了,我會做衫。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這一年,受邀在黃蝶祭的祭蝶儀式後,在溪邊,為美濃的天地水而舞。第一個念頭,就是要穿藍衫跳舞。在這片翠谷中,作為一個後生、女兒,我是那麼渴望與傳統價值對話,不想再受限於過去的束縛中,而今我們的生活已經變好了,那七層的衣領是否能放下一些?而女人,身體線條是老天與父親母親給的美麗,而今無需日日勞動做工,即便已婚,我們仍能自主決定,是否要穿得合身。敬重我的所來處,疼惜客家的勤儉溫良,只是當我自覺能更美更開放一點,揮灑屬於這世代的價值觀與生命力,在傳統服飾的變化上,我會身先士卒,勇於改變。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有趣的是,今年自家的收割祭儀,卻第一次決定穿藍衫到稻田裡跳舞,像是準備了很久似的。與好友逸姿相借她的藍衫,這件客家藍衫是逸姿自己做的,內層邊襯她選用東南亞的花布,反應美濃新住民文化的痕跡。深刻記得的,當藍衫一上身,傳統的重量下來,像被按下一個鍵,舞蹈的動作全然收攝與單純,竟沒法做柔媚明豔或明顯扭肢擺臀的動作,我感受到傳統的力量,很高興自己穿了藍衫跳舞。逸姿為此帶孩子前來參與,在田間拍了開心的合照。</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2vsw13rlF4HhQ9LI79kpxTJ_2-2UMjDStxxtRYVHng3qkJANAmtTrJYdjQYRdpRizlJh1mkLOqL2sSiFq3rBI7-FxjDMBPhEnZfW3hJTcdLuhRM4HgKc11ynYNQxHliF6r2_UwnrHsZqTZi9lEVkyA5m4EcBZUm56X_lFsm0VrCwjzI8gzAmav8Hy/s1200/4Y9A7547.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2vsw13rlF4HhQ9LI79kpxTJ_2-2UMjDStxxtRYVHng3qkJANAmtTrJYdjQYRdpRizlJh1mkLOqL2sSiFq3rBI7-FxjDMBPhEnZfW3hJTcdLuhRM4HgKc11ynYNQxHliF6r2_UwnrHsZqTZi9lEVkyA5m4EcBZUm56X_lFsm0VrCwjzI8gzAmav8Hy/s320/4Y9A7547.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-r3AQFyGvgRUeyCeSlTa_DG9TWuLAzZ9PGaeVTnvw2qLRIG3vxGyvnA41h8rB5zeE0Hkb9y-FA-atjNx0dVsImh-R9csvnmGGdEx-nZ3yrU3ptcI_UKqRu4_CR_XQzdOhipAMFFaPFQDdlHMQUEvUgypu8Y7ApMF5hGsbN3BDUKU97-JCv8-gBopF/s1200/4Y9A7562.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-r3AQFyGvgRUeyCeSlTa_DG9TWuLAzZ9PGaeVTnvw2qLRIG3vxGyvnA41h8rB5zeE0Hkb9y-FA-atjNx0dVsImh-R9csvnmGGdEx-nZ3yrU3ptcI_UKqRu4_CR_XQzdOhipAMFFaPFQDdlHMQUEvUgypu8Y7ApMF5hGsbN3BDUKU97-JCv8-gBopF/s320/4Y9A7562.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我跟逸姿說,謝謝她自己做的這一套藍衫,她走得比我前面。現代客家女性還能再綻放什麼樣的生命力呢?我們還會再變化、再手作、再創造,帶著傳統,堂堂走入當代──我想自行藍染製衫。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">不知道最後會做出甚麼樣的藍衫改版,在天地水之間跳舞。只盼有一天,能愛我的傳統,為自己的傳統服飾為榮,疼惜女性,美麗我們的身心。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfETjW6_EevCVD7B1XSiacKeMhYR2W-vUg0D2Wr2j21wjscDH63c3gt3nR7FHcdw5BUCIVNaTLLKtTvKtXTOHy4eWTy3qksdplqCg2fcyXVnRlO5fV_XBHqgHUqCxpfxUsCMcZM27kk8XhVCNiUYc8DFTcmpnWLLzuqTNo5DoYjbSvK5AzKlSII5Xu/s1200/4Y9A7574.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfETjW6_EevCVD7B1XSiacKeMhYR2W-vUg0D2Wr2j21wjscDH63c3gt3nR7FHcdw5BUCIVNaTLLKtTvKtXTOHy4eWTy3qksdplqCg2fcyXVnRlO5fV_XBHqgHUqCxpfxUsCMcZM27kk8XhVCNiUYc8DFTcmpnWLLzuqTNo5DoYjbSvK5AzKlSII5Xu/s320/4Y9A7574.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYb5Yr29PC7CXOKgdFlomX6UaJ3PosFr8NANvmSHtDP8G6c9EDvgTeZLlG8ZALA_hUHmcm87PpnbxDGlq6_Y7JqMfcXQ4YFKR97m1HCIPj-uu5Io9rCXF6dnKv5XZOKHABtOozV-xW6VCU9H3buM0njCry7uP01OWEXOzPRwsC3H94yG3EVqK6S8_y/s1200/4Y9A7585%20(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYb5Yr29PC7CXOKgdFlomX6UaJ3PosFr8NANvmSHtDP8G6c9EDvgTeZLlG8ZALA_hUHmcm87PpnbxDGlq6_Y7JqMfcXQ4YFKR97m1HCIPj-uu5Io9rCXF6dnKv5XZOKHABtOozV-xW6VCU9H3buM0njCry7uP01OWEXOzPRwsC3H94yG3EVqK6S8_y/s320/4Y9A7585%20(1).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgV-oHrcH7vKBLnr2JD9vMHcPp345o8mxXKuYiwVWL3IEDJJ4T79CCzlxPOZdeeDR8Bnirp34LIMx2mKkcwvItZoAS4GpIDbd4_MoqPodHGNz2s4Pgojr37JoUY-kFnEp-a1WxcaYJ_UH7xze7o4ADebmaCQmpzIPTKWZ7J7U-UCaOnMBmi-nfhWrgF/s1200/4Y9A7583%20(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgV-oHrcH7vKBLnr2JD9vMHcPp345o8mxXKuYiwVWL3IEDJJ4T79CCzlxPOZdeeDR8Bnirp34LIMx2mKkcwvItZoAS4GpIDbd4_MoqPodHGNz2s4Pgojr37JoUY-kFnEp-a1WxcaYJ_UH7xze7o4ADebmaCQmpzIPTKWZ7J7U-UCaOnMBmi-nfhWrgF/s320/4Y9A7583%20(1).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><p></p>
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<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-35472264527878229222023-04-15T08:51:00.002+08:002023-05-30T22:05:52.496+08:00做給田,舞給天地 [幼獅文藝]<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkGM6ojIKN_2hEShTXNNHj_7s651msM7CFvBBQSemWJe4XyMmVvMXQwj0M6z30Sz08Zi0GD2XogjrCN6wufoA9pDj3yHlnbRBiYA18HyUaXZKuqi3Uenx0kIH5Je5WDiBxbOq8vRJfQjNhEFGsSAwjo4GAoKvhmh1OaT6ZbojpbSQtKixWLd0FmzXl/s1200/4Y9A0485.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="1200" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkGM6ojIKN_2hEShTXNNHj_7s651msM7CFvBBQSemWJe4XyMmVvMXQwj0M6z30Sz08Zi0GD2XogjrCN6wufoA9pDj3yHlnbRBiYA18HyUaXZKuqi3Uenx0kIH5Je5WDiBxbOq8vRJfQjNhEFGsSAwjo4GAoKvhmh1OaT6ZbojpbSQtKixWLd0FmzXl/s320/4Y9A0485.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一、最初</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">初夏,稻穗開始垂頭,騎乘在田與田間的柏油路上,清幽的稻香隱隱在空氣中浮動,如遠古傳喚,提醒著農村田野的珍貴。我知道,這些黃澄澄的稻穗會變成餐桌上的米飯;我知道,晶瑩剔透的米飯有多好吃,而一路以來,我們就是被這片土地餵養與支持,包含我的父母、祖父母、以及更久遠的祖先。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">怎麼能不感謝呢?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">只是謝天祭儀早已式微,擺個供桌點香默禱,久而久之也顯僵化麻痺。隨著機械化時代的到來牽引出大規模耕種,農夫們留心與代耕業者之間的協定,留心收割天候、留心是否不如預期……感謝放在心裡,或在產銷的憂慮中消磨殆盡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">每每看先生小飽在收割前為種種變因而惶惶不安,看久了不忍。既然人算不如天算,若能對天祈福,祝禱豐收,是不是,就能安心?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">返鄉第二年,我突發奇想,跟小飽說:「今年收割前,我想去田裡跳舞,像小時候跳舞給阿嬤看那樣給稻子們看,祈求順遂,你弄張供桌準備食物,我們來謝天吧!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">聯繫了彰化的好姊妹明,相約共舞。她聽聞跳舞的對象是田,聲音一揚,欣然應允。又主動約另一台南朋友雩,兩人說好在收割前一日,搭車來美濃與我們相會,只為一場莫名的謝天禮儀。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小飽沒有準備三牲,他做了手工麵包、用自耕米把米缸填滿、和農友買了鳳梨,並拿出朋友以自家米製作的鹽麴,簡簡單單,就是心意。雩靜靜拿出一瓶米酒,說是朋友自行做的酒,酒香醇厚……如此,水到渠成。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">村子裡很久沒這奇怪的風景了,不是表演活動,沒有觀眾為此前來。但鄰近的伯母、阿桑、叔叔聚集在路旁,他們觀看,等著發生。對面八十二歲的阿公說要用岸上的藍色塑膠集水桶為我們打鼓。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「你等先拜,我遽遽歸去帶孫仔過來(你們先拜天公,我趕快回家帶孫子過來)!」伯母說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「還要一久?還不跳我愛歸去顧細人仔洗身了(還有多久?再不跳我要回家幫小孩洗澡了)……」另一伯母催。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「佢講佢頭前沒看到你等練習啊(她說她剛才沒看到你們彩排),佢沒看到……」阿伯指著老阿媽說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「再不跳,會落雨了喔……」伯母又催。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「做麼個要跳給禾仔看(為什麼要跳給稻子看)?我沒聽過……」伯母喃喃。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「呵呵,恁樣好啊,我的禾仔也看得到你這兜跳舞了(這樣好啊,我的稻子也能看到你們跳舞囉)……」阿公的田在對面,他看來喜孜孜的。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">阿公摘了兩朵玉蘭花給我們,為了找第三朵他像個孩子一樣到處搜尋,望著高處的花朵興嘆。我們卻一點也不介意有沒有花。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">舞台,就是田中央那一條長長的田埂。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">赤腳踩在青草上,徐行、旋轉、婀娜款擺,金黃色的穗浪成片隨風起伏,我們隨大地呼吸。跳到一半,小雨真落下來,微微細細,滴到身體的觸感,舒服得不可思議。村民因雨散去,「接下來,就是我們的事了。」明這麼想著。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是跳給天看,不是跳給人看。投入自己、投入田,是土地孕育作物,養活我們肉身。阿公還站在水圳邊持續擊打藍色塑膠桶,和凝望著田的農夫小飽。似乎在那一瞬間,我們各自明白了一些什麼。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">改變最多的,是感覺務農卑微的農夫本人──隔日小飽顯得神采奕奕,充滿熱情。似乎因這次祭儀,終日勞動的孤獨感有了質變,因這天的一切而產生了……尊貴感?如明所說:「他心目中的田被昇華了。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">而我們這些常泡在室內不接地氣的文化藝術工作者啊,也因動身執行,而紮實落地了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHEgQG4chegF1L2cTxnUbyfxTFBeWomwWCNuwLBzhaHMZH-TG_bcMasadJKdWO5ShxvVl0ow01aQO32VHM3OiV8hXx_HWNoR3rE3jnKVJez543oMINqmqsZ4oVZwgjqjaOArPTm_tOlkNqOf8kQ-vMl5auIsvHkjs9mwRI6yRIKwiEtnrSQsR_Yt16/s800/4Y9A0161.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="518" data-original-width="800" height="207" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHEgQG4chegF1L2cTxnUbyfxTFBeWomwWCNuwLBzhaHMZH-TG_bcMasadJKdWO5ShxvVl0ow01aQO32VHM3OiV8hXx_HWNoR3rE3jnKVJez543oMINqmqsZ4oVZwgjqjaOArPTm_tOlkNqOf8kQ-vMl5auIsvHkjs9mwRI6yRIKwiEtnrSQsR_Yt16/s320/4Y9A0161.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div><span lang="EN-US"><br /></span><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">二、持續</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">此後,每年收割,都為田跳舞。明只要有空就會來,帶著她老家母親收穫的青花筍,啣著菸出現在客運站等待──儘管離經叛道儘管背離傳統,仍有農家子女專屬的赤誠可愛。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「剛剛搭車時特別選了一些歌(跳舞音樂),妳看看。」上了我的車後她碎念道。「我都還沒選,妳動作這麼快!」我瞪大眼。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是第一年,我們決定為插秧而跳。就是插秧機大哥遲遲未能給確切的時間,等啊等的,直到午覺睡醒,我才發現小飽的未接來電──我漏接了那通電話。揉揉惺忪的眼,趕緊搖搖還在睡的明:「欸,插秧了!」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「可是我還沒化妝耶……」明坐起身喃喃。「不用了,走啦!」我下床梳頭,兩個人什麼都沒準備,就那幾首選歌。我甚至沒換衣服,披上外套時,恍惚想起少女時代,和夥伴相約下樓打籃球那般隨興自在。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">兩個女生騎著機車載著黑狗,來到傳說的田邊。小飽迎了上來:「好在今天插得比較慢。」可不是麼?插秧機正慢條斯理轉彎中,田已插了大半。小秧苗嫩綠嫩綠,風中顫動的樣子就像嬰兒揮舞著小拳頭。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">土地有魔法,讓人放鬆、讓人緩。腦袋因迎風而立的秧田緩緩開機,我和明沒立即下田埂,倒坐在水圳旁聊了起來,黑狗夾在我倆中搖著尾巴,午後微風清涼舒爽。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">插秧機作業完畢,開上路面,那代耕的大哥下車,經過我們身邊時,憨憨地笑說:「看,我插秧的田有沒有很療癒?」明冷不防大笑,我也笑了,這年頭有代耕農會用「療癒」這個詞,時代真的不一樣了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">於是我們就跳下田埂了。明沒化妝,我身上還穿著午睡的衣服,對比於往年的慎重,我也真喜歡此刻的自在真實。到底為什麼這麼隨性自己都不知道。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">音樂播出沒多久,鄰家阿伯便走出來站在路邊看;隔壁伯母正巡田,在田那側朝著我們用客語大聲說:「愛跳煞猛一息仔啊,跳煞猛禾仔才會生得好(跳認真一點啊,認真跳稻子才會長得好)!」不知為何,想起母親自小和我說的:「要認真讀書啊,認真讀書將來才會出人頭地。」我一邊跳舞一邊笑著回應:「好好好……」客家人,果然做什麼都很認真。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">如此以身體和天地互動,意外串起了人與人之間的看顧,代耕大哥厚實的手掌、阿伯沾染香蕉汁的汗衫、伯母的花布巾與斗笠、加以小飽沉默專注看望田的眼,當下即一切。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">前方有水圳,後方有小山,頭上有青天,而人腳有泥。親愛的美濃春天的秧苗,祝你們生日快樂,平安健康。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjGGoQRnNx7mvX0_Ih1BJphWtOZB6ZoAeH1Js8bcf7JYJokJGuXuS1I1UJ_d0c2sSQC-TxmSP7Ct4XYCUnlsK6lJ6UuBn2r7gdVg11BVYbxApmD8YosZQLr_qQRhQN5a6tOWHWhCvY4Aa1aVM3mduRx9pyBssiZTwJBocUZFzSpqo3-mbJOCKEdeV1/s800/4Y9A0067.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjGGoQRnNx7mvX0_Ih1BJphWtOZB6ZoAeH1Js8bcf7JYJokJGuXuS1I1UJ_d0c2sSQC-TxmSP7Ct4XYCUnlsK6lJ6UuBn2r7gdVg11BVYbxApmD8YosZQLr_qQRhQN5a6tOWHWhCvY4Aa1aVM3mduRx9pyBssiZTwJBocUZFzSpqo3-mbJOCKEdeV1/s320/4Y9A0067.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div><span lang="EN-US"><br /></span><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三、他方</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">後來,這事成為日常,阿伯伯母見怪不怪,阿公也不一定每場都出來看;後來,明出國了,我或獨舞或有其他外地朋友來參與;後來,有訂戶主動前來產地一同共舞……鄰近年輕農友的田,偶爾也在插秧或收割前,用他們的方式敬天謝地。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-char-indent-count: 2.0; text-indent: 24pt;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這年因緣際會,不相熟的舞者帶著不相識的樂手到來。他們為春分,我們為土地,一齊到友人家的田歌舞。踢踏舞者在木棧板上噠噠噠地傳出清脆的聲響,貝斯和小提琴聲護守,我們搖擺身體,吟唱聲在空氣中擴張,一起向風學習。該家農夫突然站上前,兩手打開,用母語大聲說出心裡面的話,一切始料未及,那是孩子真心的祝禱,當「大地母親」這句客語被吶喊出去時,我心顫抖,彷彿聽見一把古老鑰匙「喀拉」開啟沉重的鎖。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-char-indent-count: 2.0; text-indent: 24pt;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那踩在泥水裡的腳啊,日復一日。水圳裡的石頭與塑膠布搬了又放、放了又搬;秧苗沒了再補,福壽螺撿了一桶又一桶;大旱操煩、連雨也操煩……不變的是艱苦勞動,讓我們後生在前人的勞動風景中添加身體的韻律與詩意,這年復一年的耕耘,更有滋有味。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">不是不想,只是遺忘。一旦記起,便如大海,一波波傳送,如水浪吟詠,漫上生命的陸岸。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe-iLGxLlp6-XE-66q1zbSeKcrDFn2SQ4satTCa0Z8gusPJxr6zvbmhpwMkG1F010jrjG99kN4sginid-HJRqUV-2tEKfv3q7c3lVGILrU5JY8P6wMzfBBg_7DjeWKYPL_ViJk3s9GRKfxYNKVau6zQIIAg3c3fSrYmEWthRpmZOUb2_gRU-aVU6_B/s800/4Y9A0248.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe-iLGxLlp6-XE-66q1zbSeKcrDFn2SQ4satTCa0Z8gusPJxr6zvbmhpwMkG1F010jrjG99kN4sginid-HJRqUV-2tEKfv3q7c3lVGILrU5JY8P6wMzfBBg_7DjeWKYPL_ViJk3s9GRKfxYNKVau6zQIIAg3c3fSrYmEWthRpmZOUb2_gRU-aVU6_B/s320/4Y9A0248.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div><span lang="EN-US"> </span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG-sWK-Qno_avD5T7zSpO2VtS3nfzjb7rSPh70If-EjY6vUtQNowGeUd6zittTU9Qmo9CBTylFeU77BF-mDQ_nQ1Ek0cRlaaevnk7nwf5SHj10ZnsZntp56VGStpnmFk1Jo-LyqOGwElQIeQH7otFozsf34lS9tpvK63l70LiFsxF2yhuRSzne7_89/s800/4Y9A0536.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="534" data-original-width="800" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhG-sWK-Qno_avD5T7zSpO2VtS3nfzjb7rSPh70If-EjY6vUtQNowGeUd6zittTU9Qmo9CBTylFeU77BF-mDQ_nQ1Ek0cRlaaevnk7nwf5SHj10ZnsZntp56VGStpnmFk1Jo-LyqOGwElQIeQH7otFozsf34lS9tpvK63l70LiFsxF2yhuRSzne7_89/s320/4Y9A0536.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div><span lang="EN-US"><br /></span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><u>刊載於2023幼獅文藝4月號</u></o:p></span></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-49685598178865648332023-03-21T10:38:00.003+08:002023-03-21T10:38:39.277+08:00推拿(66)_剛剛好,是大智慧<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkc69Z-apYdyW902eLidWgVU2qDYBv3yKjcwQ2TWaKnMMZHge4zp9K5XgIclagv_poke2DDdx_zZIqdhQ71BUE5Ys1MQ3nZdgzr_g72_ivOgqzWg0A9VrZ92DAsG_2hvwC5aigXbJsyM4ZTnCe-Vpl7tb_rS3jPp9ZriTW1ZVT4HwbIBBPTJ-G90Fk/s3448/javardh--25fbPUePUw-unsplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3448" data-original-width="2758" height="354" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkc69Z-apYdyW902eLidWgVU2qDYBv3yKjcwQ2TWaKnMMZHge4zp9K5XgIclagv_poke2DDdx_zZIqdhQ71BUE5Ys1MQ3nZdgzr_g72_ivOgqzWg0A9VrZ92DAsG_2hvwC5aigXbJsyM4ZTnCe-Vpl7tb_rS3jPp9ZriTW1ZVT4HwbIBBPTJ-G90Fk/w283-h354/javardh--25fbPUePUw-unsplash.jpg" width="283" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">早上醒來,身體鬆軟,躺在床上,感覺我的身體變大了。那是一種奇異的舒展感。</span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那樣舒展開來的新生感,從髖關節的調整與伸展開始。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這個下盤,很久沒有伸展了。我懶散而且無力,整個冬天一直保持積極向上太累了,自年後開始的春天,我躲在自己的山洞裡,向內走。看似頹軟靡爛,沉澱久了倒也清晰,蟄伏是重要的步驟。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">按摩床上,推拿師推壓我的骨盆,有一種輕盈和舒暢是陌生的,好像身體等了很久,骨盆說:「選我選我!」似乎因為被看見被照顧到而歡欣。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">下肢因下盤的推展,變得鬆而且輕。這種體感,有點暢快,大概蜷曲在山洞裡太久,所以非常新鮮。不知為何下盤竟沒有反抗反應,所以推拿師可以直接出手,身體單純收受,有人協助釋放,疼痛令我心安,我耐痛且擅長壓抑疼痛(也許出於幼年體罰嚴重的制約),身體沉默儲存並記憶著,現在,我允許自己耗費這時間去好好釋放,感受著骨盆正在釋放她的壓力,有種舒緩和暢快自下盤湧出,新穎、陌生、又迫切需要。推拿的手離開,會想念,這感覺好奇異,我甚至感受到下肢跟著一起鬆開了,而下半身占了身體一半的面積,好像看見,出了洞口之外的,天地的光亮。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">但是呢,上半身完全不是這樣。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">上半身會思考、會用力、會反抗。我的上下半身,為何分裂?</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">忘了怎麼跟推拿師啟動話題的,關於不同的人、關於身體,我們討論到「厲害」這個冀求。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「厲害」就像夜裡的火光,眾人的目光不自覺會轉向厲害的人、厲害的事件,並私自也希望自己能那般「厲害」。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「你說的『厲害』,其實只是這個人活出了他自己,找到專屬於他的力量與顏色。不是一般人口中的厲害。不是那所謂</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">單一標準</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">的強。」我忽然若有所感。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「是!」推拿師朗聲應到。他的聲音像從地底傳來,強而有力。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那麼身體,是不是也如此呢?厲害的身體,是因為找到適切存在與平衡使用的方法,但我總看向單一部位的虛弱,可恨它不長進,求局部訓練或治療。頭痛醫頭、腳痛醫腳,不知是整體運作不當,而顯得目光如豆。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因社會集體期待的單一標準很明確,比如要「好」不要差、要「強」不要弱,於是我們不論做什麼,都會因冀求「政治正確」(厲害)而遺忘了自身真正的需求,不夠認識自己,是社會集體的缺憾。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">前些日子由於強烈懷疑膝蓋退化,上大醫院想作</span><span lang="EN-US">MRI</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">檢查醫院不讓檢察</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">醫師認為我好好的</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,我坐在車站候車室裡懷疑人生且舟車勞頓,致電推拿師,他只是輕嘆:「妳最大的問題就是妳沒有問題。」</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">什麼?是說我杞人憂天嗎?!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">可惡,我們就從這裡開始!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">身體的智慧在於,身體從不求強,只求平衡與協調。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">任何團隊合作、組織或者公司運作都需要這個智慧。一人球隊過於聚焦,整體運作就會失焦。只有領頭強,群眾只看領頭,就是一種失衡──只要局部太強,接著就會走向失調。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">比如登山,攀升高度上我的股四頭肌極其強健,強健到我習慣仰賴它,久而久之忘了臀大肌怎麼使用、核心也沒能適切支援,而使得下坡顯得耗弱,時間一長,膝蓋就不堪負荷。與其質疑膝蓋的問題,不如問自己到底如何使用身體。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">身體就是一個團隊,作為領頭的我,要能時刻協調與平衡。團隊中若有太搶眼的角色、有明星</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">股四頭肌、臂肌</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,習慣與擁戴強者出頭,就會養出弱者。這不是健康的狀態。若我的身體是穩健的團隊,每個部位都要能各司其位、各安其所,合作起來,就不費力。剛剛好,才是大智慧。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">太可惜了,我們的社會這麼喜歡鋒頭健的角色,使得每個人都追求強而鮮少有人甘於示弱。鋒頭太健會被賭爛不是沒有原因的,只是未能均衡而已,都是太求厲害的緣故。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">蟄伏許久,出了洞口。洞外一片光明,世界一樣運作,我因下盤的舒展感到快活,像睡醒伸懶腰那樣。只是,我的上半身與下半身明明連在一起實則分離,如同膝蓋之於臀部與核心的失聯,思及身體平衡之道,嘆了口氣,原來長年來我一直用這種心態在看待與使用身體。老天,原來身體,也需要老莊與佛學思想來滋養與應用啊......</span></p></div><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-82126039450245818612023-03-06T09:09:00.002+08:002023-03-06T09:13:28.540+08:00浴火白鳳凰 <p> <span lang="EN-US"> </span><span face="新細明體, serif">「為了承接他者的愛,你選擇讓自己的一部分死去。」治療師說。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「什麼?」我沒有聽懂。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「小時候,為了承接他者的愛,你選擇讓自己的一部分死去。」治療師朗聲再說了一次。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這一次我發現,我不是聽不懂,是我不想聽懂。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">內心有個地方,靜靜下雨了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">一、驗證</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">醒來,屋外天色昏暗。睡了多久呢?我睡得那樣深沉。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">朦朧想起幼年在黃昏醒來的感受,不知為何總有股被遺棄的惶恐,籠罩著即將入夜的昏暗天色。但現在,我已然長大,不需要再害怕,卻還是會陷入幽幽的陰鬱感中,不知該怎麼撫慰自己。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">此時手機響起,彼端的朋友告知她想送禮給我,因禮物有時效性顯得有些急切,是我曾說過想要的東西。努力快速清醒過來,有禮地說謝謝,內心卻湧現抗拒──因為真的好累,這食品尚需後續加工,我不想做工。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">弔詭的是,我就是沒法說真心話,面對他者善意,我保持溫良賢淑,微笑收下,忽略真正的需求,還迫使自己吐出訓練有素的感謝詞,為收下對方的愛,我選擇失真。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那位巧遇的推拿師,同時也是能量治療師,她確實沒說錯:「為了承接他者的愛,你選擇讓自己的一部分死去。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我現在就是,在療程之後,立馬重現。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">掛斷電話後,非常頹喪,走進浴室洗臉,發現身體竟開始過敏,成片紅腫起來。「是怎樣?我對善意過敏嗎?」我看著身體失笑,對鏡中的自己發問。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">意興闌珊下樓,走進廚房與先生提了這事,他一邊倒茶一邊說:「這是壓力。」瞬間當頭棒喝,我驀然轉頭,瞪視著先生:「……對,這是壓力!是壓力讓我過敏!」腦中一聲「喀啦」,那道長年來困住我的枷鎖開始鬆動,周遭時空像糖溶進咖啡裡那般旋轉。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">是的,不是禮物的問題,事實上,這跟送禮的人沒有任何關係,是我選擇讓自己過敏──沒法說出真心話,只為不敢讓對方失望。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這訓練根深柢固,遠自童年便啟動的生存機制,我很會說話,知道對方想聽什麼,怎麼把話說得好聽,因此我選擇殺掉真實的自己,以符合對方的期待與認同。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「為了承接他者的愛,你選擇讓自己的一部分死去。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">二、時移事往</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">愈近中年,童年的影子愈是迫近。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那個乖巧緘默、有求必應的女孩,長大了。即便療程已清楚告知我這個秘密,在睡了一覺醒來的電話測試中,卻什麼也沒有改變。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「我可以拒絕。」、「現在就可以打電話回絕!」我提醒自己,這讓緊繃的心緩了下來,身體也放鬆了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">過敏已持續近一個月,始終反反覆覆。這段時間,打了五支針吃了半個月的西藥,全身性的蕁麻疹仍未見改善,過敏如影隨形相伴。習慣了搔抓、習慣夜半身體的灼熱感,我還是讀不懂我的身體。但現在清楚知曉,壓力來自於抑制自己的真心,壓力會令過敏愈發嚴重。身體如此單純,只要對自己稍有不誠實,過敏便有機可趁。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">必須想辦法讓自己舒服,每一刻無愧於心。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">然而,那對一個用盡力氣只為乖巧優秀的女孩,是多麼艱難啊。「乖巧」意味著:聽別人的話;「優秀」則暗示:符合他者期待。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我回到那個小學一年級的午後,老師把收好的考卷放在桌上,我趁掃地時間摸上老師的桌子,不顧一切翻找自己的考卷,手汗潤濕了試卷紙,我卻只想把寫錯的答案改正過來……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">後來,有同學跑去告訴老師誰誰誰偷改考卷,結局告訴我我竟把寫對的答案改錯了,少了兩分讓原本的第一名變成第二名,老師當著全班的面宣布崇鳳作弊,本次考試第二名從缺。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">閉上眼,我回到那張翻找考卷的桌上,拉了張沙發給那個求好心切的小女孩。「不管你考幾分、寫什麼答案,都不會影響我對你的愛。」我輕輕拍了拍她的頭,蹲在她耳邊訴說。她坐在那張沙發椅上,蜷曲緊繃的身體慢慢放鬆,然後慢慢睡著了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">多少年來,她等著有人告訴她:「你沒有問題,你只是為了生存而執行。我理解你。」多少年來,我等著有人跟我說,讓我從牢獄中走出來。為了符合這世界的期待,逼自己走上修正的道路,求好心切的我,被判了作弊。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我回到十七歲的黃昏,睡在家中的房間裡,天色昏暗,我的父親母親走進房,怒氣沖天,而我仍睡著。父親走至床前一把拉起床鋪上眠睡的我,我還昏昏沉沉沒能意識到發生了什麼事,房間甚至沒有開燈,一切是蒙昧不清的晦暗,我糊里糊塗地站在那裡,這樣被甩了六巴掌──正、反、正、反、正、反。三回合過後,我的臉頰火辣火辣,幾乎失去知覺,依舊搞不清楚發生了什麼事……「你數學為什麼沒有去補考?!」父親火冒三丈地大吼。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我的母親,站在門口,陰暗的身影看來似乎非常憂傷。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">喔,我又做錯什麼事了?學期數學成績不及格,我不想去補考……只有一科不及格還是可以升級啊!兩科以上不及格才會被留級……我揉著臉頰,在心底無聲吶喊著。「它會留下紀錄,你的成績單上有星星</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">不及格</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">!」我聽見咆嘯,分不清是父親還是母親。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「很丟臉嗎?有星星蠻酷的,不一定要補考還是能升高三,沒有關係啊。」我沒有說,我不敢說,我的臉好痛,耳朵在耳鳴,我不能自己決定自己的成績嗎?都快要成年了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">但另一個我還在震驚中:發生了什麼事?不是睡得好好的嗎?這是噩夢吧這不是真的,我的父母不會這麼做。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">還有另一個我不停碎唸:沒事沒事,耳鳴很快就會好的,痛一下就過去了。撐一下,他們怒氣散了就沒事了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三、假面</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">花上許多年去掩埋傷痛,若談及家庭記憶總以玩笑輕鬆帶過,無法承認這些遭遇其實悲慘,我告訴自己我長大了,都過去了,沒那麼多好難過。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">沒有,它根深柢固,烙印在自己的身體裡,那些掌印衣架或藤條的暴力,我不想記得,但身體記得。我告訴自己父母親是身不由己,但身體還是記得。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「你的憤怒沒有被釋放。」治療師說。我躲進廁所,卻發現身體頹喪,這麼多年來,我連憤怒都不允許。我不敢,彷彿我釋放了就譴責了我的父母一樣,我不想譴責誰,我譴責我自己。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">做一個乖巧優秀的好女孩,我讓我的一部分死去。這個乖巧優秀的好女孩,怎麼會憤怒呢?她不應該有憤怒。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">事實上,我不記得十七歲那個黃昏的故事是怎麼結束的了。記憶停留在我撫著熱辣辣的臉頰,以及至終我的父親遺忘了這件事。他真的不記得了──為了愛我,他必須遺忘。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">好像明白了,為什麼我會害怕在黃昏時突然醒來。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我該交給這個世界怎麼樣的成績單呢?我要多擅長考核呢?你告訴我。需要什麼樣的評語才夠格被愛?需要多嚴格的評量才能通過一關又一關的生存測驗?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我的童年與青少年,泰半在這種氛圍中渡過。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">四、真實</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「現在可以許願,你想要做什麼?可以說任何你想做的事。」治療師鼓勵我。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">蛤?我不想許願,我最討厭許願。可以不要嗎?我好累,連許願都覺得費力。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「為什麼不想許願?」治療師問。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">因為許願都不會實現,為此我感到絕望。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">才意識到我為自己設下一個圈套:只要不符要求,我必然成為受害者。自始至終我不曾理解,我就是自己真正的加害者;就像自始至終我也不曾想過,我可以為自己解套,我可以是自己的醫師、自己的薩滿、自己的治療師。而我也已茁壯成熟到,作自己的父母了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">頭箍可以拿下來了,把這個長年鑲在腦袋裡的金箍圈摘掉,請讓我擁有自己的意志,擁有基本的尊重。我多想學會尊重我自己啊。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">閉上眼,作一場夢,把那片最常挨打的背撕了薄薄一片下來,新敷上一層白色的光,她的背生出翅膀,沒有振翅飛翔,歛起羽翼蹲低身子,她需要休息,等待機會。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「呃,她的羽毛是白色的!」我說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「是嗎?」治療師說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「是一隻白色的鳳凰……浴火白鳳凰……」我說。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我在胡言亂語什麼?這是什麼奇怪的景象?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「浴火白鳳凰……這是妳嗎?」治療師盯著我。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我困惑不解,這是我嗎?那一個瞬間,我不太能接受將自己置入這個圖像。意識卻清楚知曉這就是我,但我不敢是我。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">又不敢!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">對於真實的東西,我總有許多遲疑。我不敢,因為真的話語、真的事實總讓我受傷──我還會被打嗎?還會遭審判嗎?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「不會,妳長大了,不會有審判,不會有人打妳了。」</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我得深呼吸,一再對自己保證,才敢睜開眼,說:對,浴火白鳳凰。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">說真話讓我恐懼。沒關係喔,就偷偷地說、悄悄地講,被發現也沒問題的,女孩已經安全了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">五、許願</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那一個我,長年躲在心門後,不敢出來。我喚她:小鳳鳳。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小鳳鳳年紀很小,單純天真,在心門後默默養了一座花園,不大,但萬紫千紅。我想小鳳鳳知道怎麼玩耍和遊戲,我不會玩,只會考試和領獎,長年來一直受挫於和不受控的孩子共處,我不明白為什麼他們不聽話,但也許小鳳鳳懂得,她會教我怎麼做自己,養一座屬於自己的花園,花開有時,沒有花為誰而開。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">那麼,我便會鬆手複製我父親母親的控制,鬆手對自己的控制,緊箍咒會消失。而,每當臨暗時刻甦醒,我感到恐慌憂懼時,就抱抱自己,說,沒關係,小鳳鳳,不管你做得如何,都不會影響我對你的愛。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">帶我去花園裡遊戲好嗎?一起去看浴火白鳳凰。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: red; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"><b></b></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYXZvs6aswtvDBFJtjz2H3nyU9dAZb-43v3jztZGKX4ZJv5WCB5TYcCbnuUAzSeLWFp8O7y9MqMOojHd-PAn18oNSaVzg8kO6s_Ykbe2lhGFJdoDkCQ9xwCp4292EBt_k-p1KE_ZABi8Cw54iqKNry42P5RKFqTUxbzA0uq5n_et5jqY1oeUiUtjUo/s500/S__230334475_0.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="387" height="348" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYXZvs6aswtvDBFJtjz2H3nyU9dAZb-43v3jztZGKX4ZJv5WCB5TYcCbnuUAzSeLWFp8O7y9MqMOojHd-PAn18oNSaVzg8kO6s_Ykbe2lhGFJdoDkCQ9xwCp4292EBt_k-p1KE_ZABi8Cw54iqKNry42P5RKFqTUxbzA0uq5n_et5jqY1oeUiUtjUo/w270-h348/S__230334475_0.jpg" width="270" /></a></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal; text-align: left;"><span lang="EN-US" style="color: red;">[</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal; text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: red; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">註</span><span lang="EN-US" style="color: red;">]</span></b><b style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: red; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">父母親的愛,我未曾懷疑。只因他們有屬於他們的疼痛與侷限,而他們已盡力做到最好。</span></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: red; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: red; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="text-align: left;"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><u>刊載於2023.03 幼獅文藝831期</u></span></span></div><b><br /><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="color: red; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></b><p></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-90977105692575488972023-02-19T19:11:00.004+08:002023-02-19T19:12:51.827+08:00天地之大 (2023插秧之舞)<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitzY3qbF5m7ytQ8Jin8X9cxP0fj2C16mo9znlz2n7tw5NiibLWUNzm3dMfk1_2UdJSQ-D6J4zhvn6dV_C1gUCczCvM-9NoyFkYW9r6_15l2i1Gz_0cG06P2FxFcZNRX2maUJ1vXh--x2pTu8oUqIuPY66wIRlkO0s6SWeWFj3MHaXv-us-E_hJw_T5/s5328/DSC04159.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="5328" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitzY3qbF5m7ytQ8Jin8X9cxP0fj2C16mo9znlz2n7tw5NiibLWUNzm3dMfk1_2UdJSQ-D6J4zhvn6dV_C1gUCczCvM-9NoyFkYW9r6_15l2i1Gz_0cG06P2FxFcZNRX2maUJ1vXh--x2pTu8oUqIuPY66wIRlkO0s6SWeWFj3MHaXv-us-E_hJw_T5/s320/DSC04159.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">有一種頻率,是超乎想像之外的。那種震動就像風吹拂秧苗,秧尖隨風顫動,大片秧苗擺動同頻的時刻,人會突然放空……那是一種,舒服的顫慄。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">路邊的</span><span lang="EN-US">bass</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">聲低沉又寬闊,第一次聽見低頻的</span><span lang="EN-US">bass</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">聲蔓延擴散到整片田的上空,電音如此違和,卻又融合。空氣像波紋一樣化開,我感覺,田變大了。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">小提琴的聲音細緻又高揚,從路的那頭送到田埂這頭,第一次跳舞到一半我躺在草地上,約莫是這奇異的和諧讓我感覺,最舒服的姿勢就是甚麼都不用表現,讓土地承接。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">祥馨在來龍肚以後,就說她不想跳踢躂</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">這是我們跳的第二片田</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,正值生理期經血量最多的一日,最是虛弱,卻也意味著最是敏感與靈動的狀態。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">她的聲音在田間放開來,用像鐮刀一樣的弧度,會勾人的耳朵。我在這片田前第一次高亢地吟唱,不是對天,不是對地,是對平面而視的整個空間,田又變得更寬廣了,彷彿這聲音能拉出幼年甚或集體早年的記憶似地,毫無負擔,好自在,好奇怪。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">田邊有黑狗,農夫飽坐在水圳溝側,近日因疲勞與壓力導致身體不適,樹薯長出樹蔭罩著他,光影在他身上交疊,午後的陽光讓他瞇著眼,保持靜默。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmLIVFSBnjYq-ePdi0ww671bPUBGEfyEr1jQxwQA7B12vxWuAAd8IjScR8SBgW2vGJrgm_zEVx8GqY3MphAB-HAQyLcWQUwk1RlRvLaoXlP2tGSBvR0ej3NGROeaL22NYCe0F_UNk8yhlRaBhqY9gj7QccBuj7mULc_ww_NLPbSzBky3YjqwRWExUA/s1599/DSC04040.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1599" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmLIVFSBnjYq-ePdi0ww671bPUBGEfyEr1jQxwQA7B12vxWuAAd8IjScR8SBgW2vGJrgm_zEVx8GqY3MphAB-HAQyLcWQUwk1RlRvLaoXlP2tGSBvR0ej3NGROeaL22NYCe0F_UNk8yhlRaBhqY9gj7QccBuj7mULc_ww_NLPbSzBky3YjqwRWExUA/s320/DSC04040.JPG" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">每一次有新的表演者到來,我會再說一次這塊田的故事:由鄰近朱家兄弟共有,其么弟的小女居中溝通協調,希望請小飽來顧田,只盼友善耕作,年年朱家與我們購米,地不是我們的,還涉及共有產權,竟是歸返美濃七年來最穩定的一塊地。也是年年祈福與謝天的代表之地。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">約莫是在這些條件的支持中,創作者才有機會在這裡自由發揮。我知道自己的斤兩,文藝心靈時有不接地氣,老往上飄,總也能為務實勞動的農夫帶點活潑與放鬆的可能。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">祥馨與我在舞動中各成一局,擁抱了又分離,腳下的土地都讓我們找到平靜的力量。樂手也是吧……鳳梨說,今天的感受會讓他腦海中浮現新的旋律,我好驚訝,原來與土地連結可以激發人的創作。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj85ou_vmX82pvtws7TasdltCH7PIL1jMFKfk7koA4iu8gM-Fpa7Dv-E4DXgqbPYjs2Lpa6mpvcqpl5_bV4BthpAfYZzPYUfIsll2x9UMV5ziJKdeXtt33uUxXa5y0jdtQ1sn2mDBqMnKzl0oYQJfcOioWeDHa3_zNJV4KtLfhVRXoYyJvnQLcv2OVA/s5328/DSC04041.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="5328" data-original-width="4000" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj85ou_vmX82pvtws7TasdltCH7PIL1jMFKfk7koA4iu8gM-Fpa7Dv-E4DXgqbPYjs2Lpa6mpvcqpl5_bV4BthpAfYZzPYUfIsll2x9UMV5ziJKdeXtt33uUxXa5y0jdtQ1sn2mDBqMnKzl0oYQJfcOioWeDHa3_zNJV4KtLfhVRXoYyJvnQLcv2OVA/s320/DSC04041.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">胸前掛著相機的美辰一直赤腳踩在軟泥的水田中屈膝拍照,有一刻,我看見她站上田埂,兩手斜上高舉,舒服地閉上眼睛,幾乎以為她也要跳起舞來。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">在心照不宣的默契中完成了,幾個人坐在水圳邊繼續閒聊。小飽開金口了,身體不適的他竟邀約大家一起去咕便所喝咖啡</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">天下紅雨</span><span lang="EN-US">~)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,可惜咕便所今天沒開,我對著手機彼端的老闆偉志喊著我不會放棄的</span><span lang="EN-US">(</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">問幾次都沒能去成</span><span lang="EN-US">)</span><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">,聽著彼端「我等你」的回應,感覺某種神祕的共同擁戴鄉里的熱情。</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">臨走前,阿銘跑上前,跟我說,有空時,妳可以對著妳的身體唱歌,就會聽見共鳴。我傻住了,總想對土地對人歌唱,從未想過對自己。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJQ1oN6SvQBflFyi4OYhrHGEBiJVKcsQnzQP7ATOm-xvSgfSkiW_kfs_q-9QJz-MF7bFsE5Xl757Jh5YhQ8wRQzNbhyQP6eI47fOkQERFcuwTFb9kUe13byewfxAgYOUgOD5KXLU3479p4aXqO0_7FIz4SJ_W_Ks6zz6g0ImzOpk8BElq9XkpMMQH4/s5328/DSC04042.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="5328" data-original-width="4000" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJQ1oN6SvQBflFyi4OYhrHGEBiJVKcsQnzQP7ATOm-xvSgfSkiW_kfs_q-9QJz-MF7bFsE5Xl757Jh5YhQ8wRQzNbhyQP6eI47fOkQERFcuwTFb9kUe13byewfxAgYOUgOD5KXLU3479p4aXqO0_7FIz4SJ_W_Ks6zz6g0ImzOpk8BElq9XkpMMQH4/s320/DSC04042.JPG" width="240" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span face=""新細明體",serif" style="mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">就這樣揮手道別,我們的相遇,只為對田演奏與歌舞,只為祝福,連請吃飯的義務也消失了,這純摯的給出。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span face="新細明體, serif"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> ---</o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal">photo/美辰</p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0843台灣高雄市美濃區龍肚22.860289 120.576515-5.4499448361788438 85.420265 51.170522836178847 155.732765tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-65308956407501889072023-02-06T23:03:00.003+08:002023-06-15T18:00:48.046+08:00女兒這件事<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0sRQfaA2WwDz_F6Loij3YOtGSFtorcGt78pmpnyQJQTkLKUzBmlh3iVqrmHuwyo7MgCTKDoasW1S7uudG5Ge7hWCKxklquKobkdP9bgBy-KrpZi8cn7HpW_M-rV9chkVf6wqtsOU39P353sdRc9CGcum8ZZYGTV1xO2icbOBiTC7zA1f3GdkVH03f/s1920/%E7%BE%8E%E6%BF%83%E5%A5%B3%E5%85%92%E7%9A%84%E5%8A%AA%E5%8A%9B.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1920" height="187" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0sRQfaA2WwDz_F6Loij3YOtGSFtorcGt78pmpnyQJQTkLKUzBmlh3iVqrmHuwyo7MgCTKDoasW1S7uudG5Ge7hWCKxklquKobkdP9bgBy-KrpZi8cn7HpW_M-rV9chkVf6wqtsOU39P353sdRc9CGcum8ZZYGTV1xO2icbOBiTC7zA1f3GdkVH03f/w332-h187/%E7%BE%8E%E6%BF%83%E5%A5%B3%E5%85%92%E7%9A%84%E5%8A%AA%E5%8A%9B.jpg" width="332" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: inherit; font-size: 15px; white-space: pre-wrap;">嘿,親愛的夏苹:</span></p><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">我實在太意外不過留言一句話,妳回成了一則短文。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><span style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><a style="animation-name: none; color: #385898; cursor: pointer; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;" tabindex="-1"></a></span>年節滑臉書,幾行字留住了我的眼,久久不能離開:</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">「如果你有女兒,請你平等地愛她。讓她明白她是自由的,也是完整的。她沒有低誰一等,處事不需依附著他人的允許和同意。她可以輕盈地遊走和呼吸。如果她還不能,你要支持她,直到一切發生。」──吳珊珊</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">這是第一年,我開始想,以後過年都要這樣嗎?每年過年都非得回台北不可嗎?別擔心,我的夫家對我非常好,只是之於僵固的「一定」與「必須」,感到輕微不適。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">婚後,不知什麼時候開始別無選擇──是我走入禮俗,我讓自己別無選擇。而且我不說。關於「媳婦」這個角色,太多傳統要背負,而我不知為何我悶不吭聲地,將刻板框架穿套在自己身上。與公婆無關,是我,我唯恐公婆不滿意,將八點檔劇情完全內化。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">不過是揚起過年如果可能有別種選擇……便覺自己「不正確」,而趕快壓抑並遮掩這念頭。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">隨後,我看到妳敘說除夕夜鼓起多大勇氣回自己家過夜的文章。勇氣是會相互滾動的,隔天,我揹起包包說要去逛誠品書店,夫家所有人幫我想最近的書店在哪裡,才明白只要我表達需求,家人會用他們的方式支持。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">年節過後,我接到「公視好好說」的節目邀約。主持人約了三位美濃女兒到場共同座談,以我們自身為經驗,分享新時代傳統農村中的女性意識。我萬萬沒想到,會在節目中被主持人問到「有想過除夕夜妳要在哪裡吃飯嗎?」(原來這是個問題),當下還真是千頭萬緒(是說我到底上了什麼節目)。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">上這節目前我其實挺匆忙,出發前沒多久才趕緊做功課,發現其中一位受訪夥伴毓萍成為紀錄片《廳下火》的被攝者而我渾然不知,倉促中看了《廳下火》的四分鐘預告片,才發現事情大條:這是討論女性在傳統客家習俗祭祀中的缺席。在主流客家儀禮中,祖堂牌位會詳細備載每一世孩子的名字(包含已知生者),但不會有女兒的姓名,只會有媳婦的,因為女兒會嫁出去,女兒的名字該刻在她夫家的神主牌上,不能留在自家。奇怪的是,未出嫁的、離婚的、早夭的女兒、或者女同志,她們的名字也不能留在自家。死後只能被安放在外面的廟宇中如觀音寺,而美濃,是台灣「觀音寺」密度極高的地方。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">紀錄片在討論,沒有夫家可去的女兒們,死後為何不能回家?片中的毓萍對父親提問,不管她嫁不嫁,可不可以讓她的名字安在自家?女兒的名字為何不能落在原生家庭呢?</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">我驀地想起妹妹的二兒子從母姓的事情。我的母親告訴我這該保持低調,彷彿違背傳統法紀不能大聲張揚,她擔心造成親家不適而感歉疚。我不以為如此,但我知道,那源於母親的傳統教育,源自於外婆。於是我尊重母親的恐懼、理解她的禮數,她待人有她的理。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">而我感謝我的妹婿、我的父親、以及我的弟弟,他們不反對,就是最大的支持。只有我們還愣愣地想著:真的可以嗎?女兒的兒子可以作孫子?(應該是外孫)</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">於是當我被問及「除夕夜妳會在哪裡吃飯時?」我承認我沒想過這個問題,乖巧女孩的認知中選擇只有一個,而首要憂慮是我的母親會對親家感到抱歉(她沒把女兒教好)。事實上,我並不會想在娘家吃年夜飯,現實條件是美濃距離高雄很近,而一年到頭我們也沒回幾次台北/彰化,年節回夫家,我很願意。只是突然多了一個選擇,瞬間放鬆了──原來我是自由的,不非得怎麼樣不可啊!</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">「如果你有女兒,請你平等地愛她。讓她明白她是自由的,也是完整的。她沒有低誰一等,處事不需依附著他人的允許和同意。她可以輕盈地遊走和呼吸。如果她還不能,你要支持她,直到一切發生。」──吳珊珊</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">《廳下火》片中當毓萍站出來成為那個叛逆的女性,為自己所想爭取,她的母親慌張不已,家族為此議論紛紛,她更小的17歲堂妹也默默站出來,用囁嚅的聲音喃喃:「為什麼不行?我也想要啊……」我的眼淚冷不防在那一刻滑了下來,終於明白兩性自主的未來,在於為自己挺身而出。重男輕女的文化使得兩性皆受壓制,男人為重而壓力龐大、女人為輕而不平委屈,鑰匙在更年輕的孩子身上,她/他們沒有傳統包袱,而需要我們轉身護持。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">什麼是「正確」呢?歷史在我們身上輾壓著、翻攪著、轉化著。禮俗、祭儀、文化需要我們鞏固與敬重,也需要我們除舊布新,除舊布新的對象並非傳統,而是對自身與集體的探問與關懷,無畏敞開討論與交流,才會步入我們想要的新時代吧。</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">謝謝妳的勇敢。於是妳去逛妳的花市,我去逛我的誠品,於是我們才看見,背後有默許的家人。曾經我以為這話題不好公開談論,可能招來大膽大逆不道的攻擊,然而我所不知道的是,有更多女性早已悄悄開始,走出屬於她們自身的道路。</div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><br /></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">p.s 節目另一受訪人芷筠,最年輕,正是她,撮合了我們三位組合上節目。而主持人彭渰雯老師,早早走在兩性平權的道路上。與妳分享:)</div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"> </div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"> </div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">---</div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;">[連結請直接點選]</div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><br /></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; transition-property: none;"><span face="Segoe UI Historic, Segoe UI, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif">「</span><span face="新細明體, serif">公視好好說」</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: inherit;">_</span><span face="新細明體, serif">美濃女兒的努力</span><span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: inherit;">_</span><span face="新細明體, serif">直播影片:</span></div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><a href="https://www.facebook.com/watch/live/?ref=watch_permalink&v=745855920452517" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/watch/live/?ref=watch_permalink&v=745855920452517</a></span></p><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><span style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><a class="x1i10hfl xjbqb8w x6umtig x1b1mbwd xaqea5y xav7gou x9f619 x1ypdohk xt0psk2 xe8uvvx xdj266r x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x16tdsg8 x1hl2dhg xggy1nq x1a2a7pz xt0b8zv x1fey0fg" href="https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DxRpJttIvorU%26fbclid%3DIwAR2TxE84J24szH3f9NZay9UhaGKeao_qKRYnYPzlgYwAJ-udSFFMDnMIgN4&h=AT2PhK92hegL_SKYa57UDJ_qo3rEFMAfgc0Ob32CJsxdkvhAd-FziVdGvRVYJM1mk5B0PDIS5pvgrlC2KiP-yM2t12KbOcHS7D-wv3h3b_vCDieExuMut0OdlNcltcHziAUf&__tn__=-UK-R]-R&c[0]=AT2t-4n7ylPFgKMs3ol7_X8DpfTdX-n0mXt8eUS5I_9VfiDXXy9XBeFKxI9i1bm-7PCJ0AfyAorrkRc2TDOB908yTkz5bRkAi3f-bswHXoi-2_VmYz5_P5Bmt3rkBqu9wsCsrFckIABbfirEOX99oo5upK3W7Z3E4NTs2lYqx1cLzefTCqq3&c[1]=AT2t-4n7ylPFgKMs3ol7_X8DpfTdX-n0mXt8eUS5I_9VfiDXXy9XBeFKxI9i1bm-7PCJ0AfyAorrkRc2TDOB908yTkz5bRkAi3f-bswHXoi-2_VmYz5_P5Bmt3rkBqu9wsCsrFckIABbfirEOX99oo5upK3W7Z3E4NTs2lYqx1cLzefTCqq3" rel="nofollow noopener" role="link" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; animation-name: none; background-color: transparent; border-color: initial; border-style: initial; border-width: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; display: inline; font-family: inherit; list-style: none; margin: 0px; outline: none; padding: 0px; text-align: inherit; text-decoration-line: none; touch-action: manipulation; transition-property: none;" tabindex="0" target="_blank">《廳下火 Incense Fire》|台灣競賽|2022台灣國際女性影展</a></span></div><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><br /></div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><span style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: transparent; border-color: initial; border-style: initial; box-sizing: border-box; cursor: pointer; list-style: none; outline-color: initial; outline-width: initial; text-align: inherit; touch-action: manipulation; transition-property: none;"><a href="https://thcdc.hakka.gov.tw/....../12259/12260/75231/post" target="_blank">《廳下火 Incense Fire》4分鐘預告片</a></span></span></span></div></div>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"> </span></p>
</div></div><div class="x11i5rnm xat24cr x1mh8g0r x1vvkbs xtlvy1s x126k92a" style="animation-name: none; background-color: white; color: #050505; font-family: "Segoe UI Historic", "Segoe UI", Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 15px; margin: 0.5em 0px 0px; overflow-wrap: break-word; transition-property: none; white-space: pre-wrap;"><div dir="auto" style="animation-name: none; font-family: inherit; transition-property: none;"><br /></div></div>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6333868365899342496.post-62036012792386948672023-02-05T21:40:00.001+08:002023-05-30T21:49:44.185+08:00生生滅滅,歲歲年年 [聯合報|副刊]<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuERts_K2kCrge8IWGKABqvbsxXiDMfqxnjbtZtZkkVy6zkLwZctm6k52277-rxlRyi3_SweHnch37A13L5xEE_Ww8WQhWzrtOOl2IDwj9ovfkSJesZZNGefhsN5ugypvi1KGv6DjON3u2w8gQUYHlMbvyfqbnmS5UHf-tmDAaBC3zek_nqXCe_QLA/s1799/%E9%96%8B%E5%A0%B4%EF%BC%8C%E6%96%BC%E6%B0%91%E5%AE%85%E5%B7%B7%E5%BC%84%E4%B9%8B%E5%85%A7%E3%80%82.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1799" height="231" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuERts_K2kCrge8IWGKABqvbsxXiDMfqxnjbtZtZkkVy6zkLwZctm6k52277-rxlRyi3_SweHnch37A13L5xEE_Ww8WQhWzrtOOl2IDwj9ovfkSJesZZNGefhsN5ugypvi1KGv6DjON3u2w8gQUYHlMbvyfqbnmS5UHf-tmDAaBC3zek_nqXCe_QLA/w347-h231/%E9%96%8B%E5%A0%B4%EF%BC%8C%E6%96%BC%E6%B0%91%E5%AE%85%E5%B7%B7%E5%BC%84%E4%B9%8B%E5%85%A7%E3%80%82.jpeg" width="347" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p>攝影|嶼浵</p><p><br /></p><p class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 24.0pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-para-margin-left: 0gd; text-indent: -24.0pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span lang="EN-US" style="mso-bidi-font-family: 新細明體; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-fareast;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">一、</span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">起</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 走進書店一刻,我不無錯愕──這與印象中的優雅靜謐截然不同。書店前一個偌大的木結構正在成形,幾個年輕人蹲臥其間,或思考或敲打,不知要完成什麼?顯然為了這物事,書店讓出了前庭的空地,讓他們施工。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 小心穿過木造長長的枝架,繞過前庭,書店門口的鞋子如浪一般散逸,形成某種饒富興味的神祕歡迎式。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 沒有任何招呼,書店裡滿滿是人。埋首畫畫、寫書法、刻字、聚首討論、翻找東西、或者漫走。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 呃,這不是書店吧?該是美術社兼起居間之類的工作室才對……「請問要到哪裡排練?」我有禮地詢問其中一人。那人看著我:「你是哪一組?」「儀式組。」那人轉頭,向另一人詢問儀式組所在位置,隨後告訴我要去公園。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 感覺上,那人與另一人也不相識,卻一起工作……我失笑了,走出書店,陽光燦爛,誰創造了這殊異的風景和秩序?不過幾個晚上,各自就定位各自分好組別,想書店前空地施工的人們是木工組吧……「這是轎子嗎?」盯著兩條長長的挑竿,我忍不住開口,一位男子點了點頭,繼續敲打。我瞪大雙眼,他們來真的!朋友曾告訴我儀式中最後會將轎子推到海上燒掉……那麼書店裡那些伏案繪字和結繩者,就是在準備花燈燈車的相關飾物了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> </span><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">驀地感到荒謬,身處其中,見證著這城市某個角落正孕生著一齣夢、或一則神諭。書店友人北漂多年,南返高雄接手書店後,與弟弟和母親聯手規劃,籌辦一場屬於南方的正月慶典,在上元節(元宵)來臨前的周末,要推著手作花燈和轎子上街,祈福拜年,慶賀春臨。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 恍若一個晨鐘,震散了朝霧,才見那古老的傳統儀禮,如山一般矗立在煙嵐中。人說「鬧春」或「春鬧」,我們忘記很久很久了,那些幼年的廟會、戲台、踩高蹺、敲鑼打鼓賀新春,都變成了電視台娛樂節目或百貨公司周年慶鼓勵消費的背景音,是否曾真置身其中?沒有,而我寧可說是忘了,以證明自己沒有缺席過。一個受東方文化教育長大的孩子,卻什麼都失落,走春和夜祭是什麼呢?我只知道塑膠的玩具燈籠,以及笑咪咪財神爺的充氣娃娃。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 順利找到儀式組約定的公園,據說將連續排練好幾個白晝黑夜。一邊笨手笨腳跟上,一邊惶惑著這群舞者從何而來,一如我也不太明白何以自己甘願趕趕來。聽來像是個瘋狂計畫,因離奇而帶有一種莫名的恍惚。我特意前來,為響應家鄉高雄,但外地的你們從四面八方來到這裡,自行處理交通食宿,我就不懂了,這由何而生的動力?齊聚在一間書店內外,如遊子歸鄉,找的是哪個故鄉?糊紙燈籠、打結繩、描圖騰、製衣、以及練舞排陣……我們到底在做什麼?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 警察來了,說附近居民反應鼓聲太大,影響生活。一幫人求情,警察伯伯說,附近有市立文化中心知道嗎?到文化中心去吧。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 無人阻撓過節,那是每個人的心願,無論都會或鄉間,無論年歲為何。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">二、募</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 夜裡,推出大鼓,廣場中央大步跨走,胸口波動起伏,身體微滲出汗水,冬夜晚風襲來,我們大口呼吸大口喝水,咚得隆咚鏘!鼓聲響徹文化中心廣場,紅手絹甩又扭呀,花扇一開氣萬千。向晚滑車的孩子忍不住停步圍觀,阿婆以為是什麼民俗技藝團,殊不知只是一群南北青年集結,只為上元春鬧──港城做夜祭,路上有行燈。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 晚間八點整,廣場中央的我們被婆婆媽媽們包圍,這頭飄來土風舞的音樂、那頭傳出八零年代老歌……鼓手隨音符的節奏擊鼓,跳一跳不覺跟著阿姨們轉圈,一個抬頭,深藍夜空,閃耀萬千燈火輝煌,市民在這裡上演各種各樣的生命力,誰四處發送傳單,告訴了誰,周末有踩街活動喔,我們會跳到深夜,歡迎加入遊街行列。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 夜間九點,揹起包包離開,看著文化中心的招牌,不經意撞見更年輕的自己。廣場曾是十七、八歲的逃學之地,與同窗坐在階梯上風花雪月,琅琅各種詩歌與漫畫,去他的國立大學。多少年後,書店友人南返登高一呼,我為一場節慶回家,莫名拾回學生時代沒日沒夜只為完成一個理想的熱情,全然投入,只盼一個共同的未來……才發現失落的,或許不是習俗本身,而是滾滾紅塵吹迷了眼的分別心。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 做什麼事都要有目的、有經費才有執行、學習計算成本利潤、這一趟還有什麼預期效益……腦袋什麼時候被洗成這樣我不自覺,突然間明白「世故」二字是什麼意思。返家已深夜,撥一通電話給大學閨蜜,與她分享各種見聞,「說慢一點你,嗓子都啞了……」電話彼端的她喃喃,才驚覺自己的興奮。排練一天的小腿深刻痠疼,神智卻極清明,怎麼說呢?像被久違十八歲的自己叫醒了,痴人說夢不是不可能,沒見書店裡的弟弟妹妹們還在為花車製作挑燈夜戰呢,據說一幅窗花都要剪紙一點鐘以上。木工如火如荼地趕工、為點燈變身水電工、服裝組日以繼夜手縫腳鈴、無法出席的支持者相繼捐款……大家是玩真的,已經申請路權,挨家挨戶拜訪說明,我們會把廟會和戲台的熱鬧全搬上街。書店裡那幅長達兩尺的書法,二字「放夜」蒼勁不失節制。古有宵禁,難能夜行,而今燈火通明時代,早忘放夜之可貴──那珍惜是什麼樣子?我不知道,時間走得太快,當元宵燈會一年比一年更盛大喧騰,若不作走馬看花的觀眾,我們還能是什麼存在?</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">若有這個榮幸,讓我歸來,參與與見證一座城市的可能……相識與不相識的朋友都來到,明天、明天繼續去文化中心排練……</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjp4sDGMiry5F2E0daIdPfGmmKfMBHRMc9UVvs4LqfnDX3IV_OxXNs5WtsmA1bgzxM0HWGVSZFxKrJOCkaD1EliH_4vc9zie-wR8p7O0FzA7ENkI1s_va9ebM2leh_RX_3jiO-BmojhdH11drX2U2-sgzIHYGacm_4gFPPyybk1i0eR9eE8zeOmvmj0/s1799/%E8%8B%A5%E6%B2%92%E6%9C%89%E9%BB%91%E6%9A%97%E5%88%B0%E4%BE%86%EF%BC%8C%E6%80%8E%E6%9C%83%E6%9C%89%E5%90%91%E5%85%89%E7%9A%84%E6%B8%B4%E6%9C%9B%E3%80%82.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1799" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjp4sDGMiry5F2E0daIdPfGmmKfMBHRMc9UVvs4LqfnDX3IV_OxXNs5WtsmA1bgzxM0HWGVSZFxKrJOCkaD1EliH_4vc9zie-wR8p7O0FzA7ENkI1s_va9ebM2leh_RX_3jiO-BmojhdH11drX2U2-sgzIHYGacm_4gFPPyybk1i0eR9eE8zeOmvmj0/s320/%E8%8B%A5%E6%B2%92%E6%9C%89%E9%BB%91%E6%9A%97%E5%88%B0%E4%BE%86%EF%BC%8C%E6%80%8E%E6%9C%83%E6%9C%89%E5%90%91%E5%85%89%E7%9A%84%E6%B8%B4%E6%9C%9B%E3%80%82.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><br /> <p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">三、行</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 五福路與中正路,如兩道青春魔幻咒語,我在這兩條馬路上讀書與逃學、壓抑與叛逆。路的盡頭,是大船入港的西子灣,大學聯考前倒數的日子,機車甩尾上柴山追夕陽,只為呼吸一口自由的空氣。海的味道如某種藥引子,藏有遼闊無邊的未來。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 而今,我們一路從市立文化中心彩排到鹽埕區的銀座劇場,劇場在哪?一條窄窄昏暗的舊崛江市場街,秧歌舞陣跨著交叉的花步子,從巷子頭跳到巷子尾,中間還鑽了轎子,惹得兩旁店家和民宅的居民都探頭,從困惑好奇到喝采加油,隔壁飲料店老闆闊氣地請了每位表演者一人一杯冷飲,有阿姨詢問正式演出時間為何?屆時邀請親朋好友一起來看啊。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 哎呀這放夜難控,精準時段還真說不上來,阿姨,妳跟親朋好友儘管在家看電視吧,直聽聞外頭有鼓聲,舞陣就來了!</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"> 唯與在地居民連結時我感到踏實,而不覺這樣的行徑飄忽如夢,一座敲敲打打以造船起家的大城,為島嶼經濟起飛付出一生的長者,他們勞動的身影與盼望的面容,成為我重新呼應這座城市的關鍵鎖匙孔。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">「點──燈──」他宏亮的聲音如鑰匙喀啦一聲旋開寶箱,高高的燈車就亮了。「哇──!」車身花花綠綠的剪紙霎時閃動繽紛的光影,灑落一群人不眠不休的努力。高舉的鼓棒落下,舞者進入,白衣金襟者打頭陣,我等邁開練了無數次的菱形花布子,這麼沿街跳起來,一股奇異的快意自身體底層湧升,是的,無論來自何方,我擁戴我的文化、我的根源,並勇於開創我們的節慶,因為這是我們生活的地方。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">從小到大沒這麼順理成章沿街吆喝過,從巷口跳到大街上,車如流水馬如龍,紅綠燈前你們又叫又笑,大街上瘋跳,像國慶一樣歡騰,某個閉鎖已久的大門自動開啟,才發現根本不需要尋找,傳統不曾離開,只要我們願意。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">愈來愈多人加入遊行隊伍,轎子人力扛、燈車人力推,速度有限,交通警察出動,哨聲響起,斑馬線前機車騎士都停下。「新年快樂!」、「元宵節快樂!」誰拿著扇子不停揮舞,沿街對市民大喊;誰甩著手絹對機車前座的孩子扭腰擺臀,後頭的爸媽笑著擺手;汽車副駕駛座的人搖下車窗,舉起手機按下錄影鍵;哪裡送來的紅酒?哎呀喝就是了!不知哪間店家的招待……原來敲鑼打鼓、載歌載舞,以身體行動播送對城市的祝福,這麼好玩。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">表演不只是藝術,也是常民生活。百貨公司前廣場正舉辦一場說明會,舞者因緣際會溜入串場,逗樂了女主持人,隨即變成群舞鬧春……我跳著跳著,跳出十歲被火燒掉的大統百貨公司、跳出十七歲為升學主義奔逃的五福路、跳出文化沙漠空汙大城的集體卑微、也跳出一個小小市民的暢快與驕傲。歸鄉的孩子帶著遊歷的力量回來,召集開創,饋予養大自己的城。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">挾著這股溫暖強勁的洋流,經過市立警察局,為清冷肅穆的辦公之地潑灑一點光亮,警察先生,謝謝你為我們服務。剛正不阿的臉笑了,這是慶典的力量。長長馬路上,思及友人引述柳宗悅的話:「傳統並非過氣的形式,而是永遠的型態。因此所謂的回歸古代,不是要回到過去,而是要回歸永恆之中。永恆不是指時間,而是超越時間的世界。」有那麼一瞬,我感覺那超越時間的世界,就在警察先生融化的笑顏裡。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">夜間十點,熄燈默行,西子灣前許願,繞港入山。每一個上坡的腳步,都帶著沉靜落定的學習,腳走到僵直發痠,眼前一切卻愈發清明:看不見的,看見了;遺忘的,記住了。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">四、滅</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">轎子推出漁港,一把火燒不盡,岸上的人看著海上的火光歌唱,不知不覺凌晨三點,不知是什麼壯大了我們,竟了無睡意。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">古早的古早,人們也曾這麼熱熱鬧鬧上街、安安靜靜歸返吧。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">散場後回家,天光已泛白,躺在床上我睡不著,心裡有個膨大的東西需要消化,這不是夢,如此真實,一個被東方文化豢養、在城市迷失的孩子如此遇見歸屬,路邊與我擊掌的人有著相似的渴盼,彷彿誰也不曾孤單過。「這樣的活動,明年還會有嗎?」西子灣前有路人詢問。</span><span lang="EN-US"><o:p></o:p></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;">我不知道,但是我會回來,以這座港都高雄為榮。</span></p><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: "新細明體",serif; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family: 新細明體; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-fareast; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiATGvWzd72d2NWZqGfl1kINKP3qjWs1c_ZiBTq4Gb_fSvbdy9ZgmX-IogeouNuqt_-beatIisRcUCleNHdRW32A1UdWvkPT-ligDCjwm4Ac4ekX0hlw6_kL5oCloJIZYdqapCgj8VtEGBtNEsJLYn2-u-Ara3cIg1ZakETIv-sj-vbdZwDV4EnaXQF/s1799/%E7%B4%99%E7%B3%8A%E7%9A%84%E7%87%88%E7%B1%A0%EF%BC%8C%E6%98%AF%E5%90%8D%E5%96%AE%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E5%BF%83%E6%89%8B%E7%9B%B8%E6%98%A0%E3%80%82.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1799" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiATGvWzd72d2NWZqGfl1kINKP3qjWs1c_ZiBTq4Gb_fSvbdy9ZgmX-IogeouNuqt_-beatIisRcUCleNHdRW32A1UdWvkPT-ligDCjwm4Ac4ekX0hlw6_kL5oCloJIZYdqapCgj8VtEGBtNEsJLYn2-u-Ara3cIg1ZakETIv-sj-vbdZwDV4EnaXQF/s320/%E7%B4%99%E7%B3%8A%E7%9A%84%E7%87%88%E7%B1%A0%EF%BC%8C%E6%98%AF%E5%90%8D%E5%96%AE%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E5%BF%83%E6%89%8B%E7%9B%B8%E6%98%A0%E3%80%82.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSHJGH5cuSzRA5p7126cFR4xAWeTJ9eb5r1FrmeT3sD1CMObqiXtbjfFu7VMeBNsGe1cETR1rJQ1cxHQgj8atFNHQANLKloOJy8xImDfQMsrq53huKJ2CCY2EHBeBE0kGbRj3hio6O2ovBySXKXrEq5tm3ypI2irm7q-kffmvI6nNUmgwlvlOYo3qh/s2016/2023%E4%B8%8A%E5%85%83%E6%98%A5%E9%AC%A7%20(2).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1512" data-original-width="2016" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSHJGH5cuSzRA5p7126cFR4xAWeTJ9eb5r1FrmeT3sD1CMObqiXtbjfFu7VMeBNsGe1cETR1rJQ1cxHQgj8atFNHQANLKloOJy8xImDfQMsrq53huKJ2CCY2EHBeBE0kGbRj3hio6O2ovBySXKXrEq5tm3ypI2irm7q-kffmvI6nNUmgwlvlOYo3qh/s320/2023%E4%B8%8A%E5%85%83%E6%98%A5%E9%AC%A7%20(2).jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p></p>崇鳳http://www.blogger.com/profile/11619522728352120891noreply@blogger.com0